I like this guy I play music with, but he is sending mixed signals. He is friendly and kind, but I once mentioned having been in love in the past & he got a look of fear and trembling in his eyes. Also, he looks afraid when I have mentioned that I was doing something with people on Friday--as if he was afraid to hear I was on a date. Also, I mentioned having gotten a little tired of people talking shop, and he said nervously that he does that sometimes. He was flirty when we first met, but now he tends to be much more serious around me. Sometimes I think he is shy, but sometimes, he just seems plain terrified. I do not think I am doing anything so horrible, other than being friendly and open, but not pushy. Yesterday, I used "sexy" as an adjective, and he just about fell off his seat. I want to break the tension somehow, but I don't know what to do. While I have gotten to know him and he had never once mentioned a gf, but I just found out he has one. Any decoders out there?
2006-08-12 18:35:53 · 9 answers · asked by calliope 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He is most likely falling for you but is afraid, and yes, even terrified. He doesn't really know how you feel about him, Your saying that you have other plans makes him insecure. I think he probably wants to be with you but he isn't ready to dump the old gf because he doesn't know where, if indeed anywhere at all, the two of you are heading. Kind of a "bird in the hand vs you in the bush" deal. Give the dude a little time to figure things out but if you don't want him for a bf then let him know asap! Just be honest and out of the blue just tell him how much you value his friendship and how glad you are that you two never went the bf/gf route since it is the best way to lose a friend and that while bf's are a "dime a dozen" true friends are priceless!
2006-08-12 18:47:38 · answer #1 · answered by old dude 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-02 00:31:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you answered your own question. He has a girl friend, that obviously he would like to keep. If he seems a bit interested in you, I would just kind of just open up a discussion in that realm. Tell him that you'd like to hang out sometime...socially, that you'd like to get to know him better. He may jump at the chance, or he may say I'd like to, but I have a girl friend. You then could say, oh that's right, is it serious? If he says yes. Then you know where you stand, and can now count this guy as a friend.
2006-08-12 18:42:31 · answer #3 · answered by sleepless in the ATL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
act normal!!! if being friendly and slightly flirtatious is just in your nature then carry on. He'll eventually get the point that you aren't trying to jump on his jock. Maybe then he'll calm down too and not be so paranoid and maybe you can build a friendship and see what happens....if you really like him it sucks to have to wait but it will be worth it in long run.
2006-08-12 18:41:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he has a girlfriend, back away. He's obviously just trying to be friends with the opposite sex, with no strings attached.
2006-08-12 18:40:11 · answer #5 · answered by *zz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey yell at him lol j/k ask him whats bothering him!! why is he being the way he is n tell him that he can tell u bout w/e it is n try to make him feel comfortable around u by sayin these stuff.
2006-08-12 18:40:37 · answer #6 · answered by green day chick. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not much to decode. He is taken. Until he or she or they decide otherwise.
2006-08-12 18:38:44 · answer #7 · answered by yowhatsup2day 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is afraid his girl will find out and kick his wimpy butt..........LOL
2006-08-12 18:38:10 · answer #8 · answered by mizzzzthang 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont go out w/ him??? he has a gf?? i think that shoulld drop a hint
2006-08-12 18:40:41 · answer #9 · answered by relayruntoday 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋