My boyfriend and i got into a fight because i got up to talk to a guy that i knew. he has also met this person before and the whole nite i introduced him to people as they came up to me. I tried very hard to make him feel appreciated. Once i got back to the table he was mad. Accused me of having my hair messed up which was not true at all. i would never do that to someone i care about. I rarely go out to the bar and some people i have not seen in a long time. my boyfriend is also 10 years younger then me. I am 32. I know i did not do anything wrong. Everyone that knows me, knows that i am with him. I am so tired of trying to watch what i say and do when we are out like this. It is the local hangout for me, People know me and i know them. Its the bar. What did I do that was so bad?
2006-08-12 16:02:29 · 25 answers · asked by two_bratty2004 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
let me add on a little more. I dont usually care if he knows someone and gets up to say hi. All these people that i knew were my friends that i hung out with when i was very single. I now have a boyfriend and dont alway feel i need to hand in the bar now which i dont and neither does. My friends are also people i went to school with, So its ok for him to talk to he knows but not me? I realize he is insecure and he really has no reason to be. I go out of my way to make him not feel this way. I even told him where i was going and who i was talking to and that i would be right back. I was not even there for 5 min. talking to this person or was i drunk. i have also tried to talk to him about this but he say i dont make him feel like a man. what more can i do?
2006-08-12 16:15:15 · update #1
You didn't do anything bad. It sounds like your boyfriend was a little too clingy that night and just needed some attention. Keep in mind he's 10 years younger, may not be used to hanging out with people your age and can possibly be a bit immature. But, if you really love him, talk it over, work out how to spend enough time with each other and what you guys can do to make BOTH of you feel appreciated (like if you're at a party/bar with HIS friends). The key to a relationship is communication. Good luck and wish you two the best.
2006-08-12 16:07:08 · answer #1 · answered by Q&A Chick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am WAY TOO familiar with this scenario.
His insecurities are HIS problem -- not yours. You just have to set boundaries and not get dragged into his games. If he can't grow up, then you need to get out. If you really feel that the relationship is otherwise worth fighting for, then suggest couples counseling.
I invested nearly seven years with a guy like that, and finally had to accept that he wasn't going anywhere, which was also holding me back. But he refused to go to therapy, even though he fully admitted he had these issues! It's too frustrating.
in response to your added details:
My point is that you're doing too much already. He needs to have trust and faith; and if he doesn't, the relationship will never work, because it won't be long before your resentment boils over.
2006-08-12 16:06:06 · answer #2 · answered by HearKat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Is this something you can live with? Because it will not change take it from me. My life has become far too busy to have friends but there was a time when I was in your shoes and my future husband was the way. He never changed but I just became to busy to be that social so it didn't matter. It is very difficult living your life walking on eggshells all the time. Good luck.
2006-08-12 16:09:06 · answer #3 · answered by JENNLUPE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he adores your yet has you on such a high pedestal that it makes him worry when you give attention to 0ther men.
It can understand and sympathize. I am the same way with my wifey...she is 5 years younger though and very beautiful. Guys always want to talk to her.
Thankfully she pretty much stopped hanging out and talking with her guy friends but I still see men checking her out all the time. It is flattering yet intimidating.
2006-08-12 16:15:47 · answer #4 · answered by sshazzam 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's an insecure person who has probably been in a few bad relationships. If he can't trust you anytime you so much as talk to the opposite sex, it's not going to work. You can't be controlled and smothered like that. He needs to deal with his problems.
2006-08-12 16:06:04 · answer #5 · answered by DeadxStar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dump him now he'll be gone in the comming year if he's acting like this he is way to young 22 please what's wrong with you wake up and smell the coffee i'm 34 and i would never try to have a serious commited relationship with no 24 year old already been that age and did all that jeolousy baby crap if you want younger men then just keep them for the booty call otherwise your in for a messed up ride.Goodluck.
2006-08-12 16:09:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you going to a bar if you have a boyfriend? There are better things for a couple to do. Apologize to him, ask him to forgive you and let him give you a good spanking. Then stay out of bars with him - try the movies.
2006-08-12 16:07:55 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honestly, if I were you I would tell your bf to grow up. And if he has no more faith in you than to think you are going to mess around behind his back then what is he doing with you? You have to trust someone in a relationship and if you cannot trust them then you are not with the right person. Best of luck.
2006-08-12 16:06:35 · answer #8 · answered by Mav 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
couples should NEVER hang out in bars together
one or the other gets drunk and starts a fight
you are dating a 22 year old boy who sounds very jealous
DUMP HIM
2006-08-12 16:06:11 · answer #9 · answered by Mopar Muscle Gal 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well sometimes people donot see things the way you will so try to let him know that he is the only one you are worried about and if he does not understand than try to let it go ohterwise the situation will get worse or stop talking to other males
2006-08-12 16:15:16 · answer #10 · answered by Fantasy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋