How could I become a Christian?

Question

I was raised Catholic, (baptised, recieved first communion, and confirmed)....but I was forced into going to church and because of that, I HATE churches. I think my parents' plan really backfired.
BUT I think that I've reached a point in my life that I need to be around more positive people and provide better role models for my kids. I also want to become a "second time virgin" and meet a great Christian guy (I want the best father for my girls). And I want to wait till we get married before we sleep together. I do beleive that it helps prevent a lot of marriage problems. So my question is, how could I meet such a guy, and become Christian without going to church. I really don't like churches.!

Answer 1

You will likely be receiving TONS of advice from this question. . .and with personal agendas. . .so be prepared for this. . .and please have an open mind and quiet heart when sorting through the replies.

As a married father of two small boys. . .and having gone through some religious trials and tribulations myself (as well as having to deal with the aftermath of my parent's nasty divorce when I was only 15. . .and a subsequent distrust of male-female relationships and forced celbacy for nearly 10 years). . .I feel adequately qualifed to answer your question:

1: Read and study the Bible. . .you "may" enjoy Eugene Peterson's "The Message" (the Bible in contemporary American English). . .but there are others as well, including a few that are supported by the Roman Catholic Church. Pay special attention to Proverbs, the Psalms, and the Gospels (first four books in the Christian/New Testament).

2: Take time out each day (or for as many days as you can in an week). . .for personal quiet and meditation. . .to foster and promote your spiritual growth.

3: You will never be a "second time virgin". . .at least biologically. . .but in mind and spirit you can be. . .and, as you well know, women usually set the pace (and standards) regarding physical intimacy in relationships. . .so guys that can or will not respect you this way are. . .yes. . .not worth sticking around for (although. . .beware. . .there "may" be the feeling by one or both of you for an accelerated courtship. . .so that you can put the wedding bands on and begin enjoying each other erotically. . .but for the need to know if you are both compatible outside the bedroom, how you each deal with adversity, whether "he" will truly be an advocate for your children's growth, etc.)

4: It would be a good idea if you at least "attended" church services. . .and this can be Mass as well (knowing that you may be eligible for receiving Holy Communion). . .as it is a good idea that your children are being exposed to religious education OUTSIDE the home. . .and with all of you going to the same church!

But you do not have to become addicted to this church, nor do you have to join it. My sense. . .knowing that you would like to become a "Christian". . .is that you do need to find some peace in finding one suitable religious denomination to "attend" it with some degree of frequency. . .and you should start first with your roots before rejecting it outright. . .but, this time around, you can do it with very different reasons and objectives. (It is quite natural that "Christians" attend church. . .to support and help each other in dealing with this Game of Life!)

Shalom (Peace) to you on your journey. . .and I pray that you will find a great guy in due course as a reward for your courage and faithfulness. Be mindful also that there is a guy out there who deserves you as a reward as well. . .and that G-d will provide the time and means to bring you both together. . .whether directly or indirectly (through the positive influence of others).

Answer 2

For starters get a King James or NIV Bible and starting reading all the passages about Jesus.

You have to put out of your mind what you were indoctrinated into and start leaving about Jesus and how he expects us to think, act and behave.

Sounds like you're already thinking right and on the right track.

Stay away from all the stuff by PEter and Paul and John not related to Jesus -- that's the foundation of the Catholics.

Read some of the parables from the old Testiment. Job, David and Goliath, etc.

Read Jesus again.

Pay close attention to what JEsus did, how he acted towards others, how he answered questions and what he said about how to live.

Then look to God for your direction.

As for finding good Christian men, sadly the best place is a church, but I'm not a believer in churchs either.

Make sure you make it clear up front that you are a Christian live a Christian life and don't fool around and won't be fooling around.

That will scare most of the men away. Guys don't like investing time and money without getting some!

Find a guy who'll help with the kids.

Find a guy who'll help you and work around the house.

I don't even know if you should hug or kiss him!

See if he stays with nothing.

Answer 3

Have you thought about visiting christian churches that aren't Catholic? There are a lot of different types of churches out there and you may find something you'll really love. I was raised southern Baptist and was forced to go also. When I was 18 I moved out and didn't go back to church until I was in my late 20's. I visited several churches and really felt like the pentecostal type churches were best for me. So now I go to Assembly of God. There wouldn't be so many different christian churches if "one size fit all". Look around and don't be afraid to try something new. The pentecostal churches were so different from my old church that there were a few things I wasn't comfortable with at first, but I read my Bible and saw that what they were doing was in the Bible and so I stuck around and now I'm completely comfortable and find other type churches really boring. So, my advice is to try something new.

Answer 4

"CHURCH" you speak of is only one. The body of Christ.
Denominations don't exist in Christ. He was made the word in flesh as well as he has always been in spirit. JOHN chap one.
True Chrisitans (saved souls) need each other. GAL 6:2 the only way to fullfill the Law of God. Carry/share each other's burdens
and LOVE. If you hate CHURCH- you cannot love CHRIST.
If you were raised Catholic and forced-then find out what other
"religions" worship Christ and find a small loving and caring congregation that teaches the Truth. I've never known a truly repent person-who hates CHURCH. Many different "local churches" are self-serving but remember these are man-made building for gathering. Start attending different ones because you need Bible Study to learn knowledge of God's Word. Protestant services offer Bible studies during the week and on-line computer. You can't serve or live for Christ if you don't know him.
You don't choose the time of your salvation-He does. You can choose to buy a car but you can'y purchase salvation- It is a free gift from God. THE GOSPEL. 1 COR 15:1-4 That Christ was born in the flesh -died (crucified) and was resurrected. That is the only GOSPEL that saves if you have the FAITH to BELIEVE.
Besides attending "CHURCH" has it's pluses-Good people and Mr. RIGHT may be there tomorrow morning. Start reading your BIBLE. 1 TIM 2:15 Study to show thyself approved. Good Luck
and may Grace of God shine upon you.

Answer 5

Get over the "I hate churches" thing! First of all, not all churches are like the kind you were forced to attend as a child. There are many good Bible believing churches that you will discover are totally different, with vibrant music and relative messages that will touch your heart. You can even listen to some of them online... try James River Assembly of God in Springfield MO... they have an on line message.... and music too... and you may discover there is another world out there to discover...churches that have life and joy and good Christian guys too. A really good Christian guy won't necessicarly want to marry you though unless you became a Christian yourself. It is important that both of you belive the same thing or pretty close...or you will spend the rest of your lives arguing and fighting over religion and how to raise the kids. You need to find a church in your town where you can really find God, and get to know Him. I suggest the Assemblies of God, or Charismatic churches, or even the Larger non denominational churches such as Joel Osteens church in San Antonio Texas. Try it....you'll like it!

Answer 6

I was brought up a Catholic myself and understand how you feel. I have been to a lot of churches and many are not worth your time. But in order to live a christian life we must find a church that we like. There are all kinds of services and I'm sure you will find one to your liking, but you have to try. Start by listening to local christian radio, and when you hear a preacher that you like then give his church a try. You could ask any christian friends that you might have, about their church.

I'm going to a new church tomorrow, hope I like it, need a church home!!

All this being said, you must be born again to see the kingdom of God. Read the book of JOHN it has the plan of salvation. You are doing a lot of things right, now take this most important step of your life if you haven't already. God Bless!

Answer 7

i'm a catholic too, and i don't go to church that often, not that i don't like to go to church but sometimes i'm a bit lazy. i still think that you should try to go to church, try at least once in a month. But i do believe that a Christian is someone who believes in Jesus not someone who goes to church. so you can be a Christian without going to church, you can read the bible, pray to God, praise God, at home. Though i would suggest that you rethink about what really drives you to be a Christian, because doing nice things and be a role model for your kids is not enough to be a good Christian. Besides going to church can help you meet with a lot of people, you'll make new friends and being in the "same" crowd would help you faith to grow faster.

Answer 8

I am a Christian, I never go to a 'church' in that sense as the church actually means the 'called out' people. The first thing to know is that Jesus gave his life for you. He was raised from the dead by God. In Romans 10:9 and 10 it says that if you confess Jesus as Lord and beleive in your heart God has raised him from the dead you shall absolutely be saved. From that point on you are a Christian and you wil have Christ in you.
Then just ask God to bring some Christian beleivers to you and he will send them. Then you can fellowship with and learn from them.

Answer 9

Part of the Christian beliefs is attending church (several verses in the Bible state that you should gather together with other believers to worship and praise the Lord). If you didn't like the Catholic denomination, try a few others until you find something you like. I attend a contemporary Christian church with a praise and worship band. There are no routines - we sing and dance to the Lord to worship Him, and we learn His teachings from the Bible. I'm sure you'll find a church like that worth while.

Answer 10

The way to become a Christian is to accept that Jesus is the son of God and that he died on the cross to save you from your sins, Ask him to come into your heart and be your Lord and Savior and to forgive you of your sins. Ask that he lead you in a Christian lifestyle and that he guide you to make good choices in your life. As far as church goes, maybe if you found the right church for you, then it wouldn't turn you off so much. As for meeting a great guy, well lots of people have met in church.