I think my husband should stop smoking not only for health reason's but because we need the money he is spending to help reduce our debt and take care of things that need replacing or repairing in our home. He says what he spends on cigarette's is not causing us any financial problems and since he did it before he met me he should be able to continue to do so. I think he is being unfair to all of us and lying to himself too about how much his smoking really is costing us.
2006-08-12 06:47:47 · 21 answers · asked by ParaUnNormal 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I think that if he really loves his family, I think that he should quit...My parents smoke and they spend a lot a month on cigeretts. You should really talk to him and tell him what he needs to do. If he wants to keep his family and his life, he should quit...
2006-08-12 06:51:53 · answer #1 · answered by Justine 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That's a difficult answer, I do love my family, but stopping smoking is harder then some people think. I've tried a couple times, but I failed, yes it's because of my own fault, but I'll get agitated & cranky & go out and smoke & calm my nerves. I don't think he's lying. It's honestly really hard to stop. It's not jus willpower, though I've known people who quit cold turkey, but for some of us, it's hard. I've quit drug's, and a whole lot of things in my past life that SHOULD be harder than quitting smoking cigarettes, but this is the one thing that I'm fighting my hardest ever on.
2006-08-12 06:53:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you are being a judgemental unreasonable person. If you married a smoker, and you knew he smoked BEFORE you married him then you are acting like most women do after the New and Shiny wears off of their marriage, now you are trying to CHANGE him. I don't blame him for sticking with it, I am sure the constant nagging does not make the reason to quit seem more appealing to him. Try this truth on for size: THE ONLY WAY TO CHANGE A GROWN MAN IS IF HE IS WEARING DIAPERS!
Put a sock in it sister, you're trying to control him, and now picking at him for something that YOU KNOW he did/and does ever since before you married him!
How about if he goes through your likes and says we can no longer to afford to buy your favorite soap or new clothes for you anymore because that is keeping us from getting out of debt, from now on, NO MORE NEW CLOTHES you MUST SHOP ONLY AT THE DAY OLD BAKERY OUTLET AND THE THRIFT STORES! Maybe you have some expensive tastes that he would like to see you give up...Marriage is NOT all about what YOU want, whiner. Get over yourself, and let the poor man have a cigarette if he wants it, just think if he dies from smoking you can collect his life insurance and then you won't have him to kick around anymore. You will have BOTH of your problems solved at one time!
Maybe if you would let up on him and not NAG at the poor man, he would have more incentive to cut back if you also agree to cut back on something that YOU spend on that is ONLY about you?
I think you sound really sellfish, you married a man who enjoys smoking, you KNEW THAT WHEN YOU MARRIED HIM, so what are you really saying, would you really rather be divorced or married to the smoker that you accepted as your husband? I think you have gotten to the nit picking stage, and while my views may not be popular with the women here, many of us are guilty of the SAME THINGS! We marry someone then try to change him. If it's so repulsive to you WHY DID YOU MARRY HIM AT ALL?
I hate whiners, and I think your husband could deal with you if he even wants to try to quit, and THAT DECISION IS UP TO HIM! NOT YOU! LIVE WITH IT OR LEAVE IT.
2006-08-12 07:06:02 · answer #3 · answered by ruthie_msw 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband did in Feb. Our son had some health problems and even though my husband doesn't smoke in the house it was on his clothes and when our baby would get around him he would start to wheeze.
My husband had been smoking since he was 17 and he turned 31 in Feb.
But the sad truth is you can't stop smoking if you don't truly want to.
2006-08-12 07:00:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
YOU can't make a smoker stop smoking or a drinker stop drinking. They have to decide for themselves to stop. No amount of nagging, begging or pleading will work. Just point out the health aspects of stopping, the money part never seems to phase smokers.
2006-08-12 06:56:23 · answer #5 · answered by Chatty 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Smoking can give lung cancer, which causes more serious hospital bills. And second hand smoke is even worse than first hand smoke, so if he really cares about the family, he would give a shot at quitting.
2006-08-12 06:53:33 · answer #6 · answered by musicrazy 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yes I agree. it cost a lot of money. people who smoke do not realize it. Once I told someone to give me 30-40 dollars a week to throw away on myself and they said that it was not the same thing. I know it's hard to be hooked on nicotine. But the people on it do not understand the problem. good luck. I know how you feel.
2006-08-12 06:51:47 · answer #7 · answered by Ginnykitty 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have been smoking for more than 10 years and my new boyfriend has asma so i stopped bout 4 weeks ago for him. But he never asked me. it was my own choice so think that makes the difference whether it works or not.
2006-08-12 06:56:05 · answer #8 · answered by string_bean_jean13 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is a smoker not a criminal..he is addicted. His addiction has nothing to do with his feelings for his family. I smoke as well and my hubby never complains. He knows I love him. He refuses to pay for my smokes, which is fair. I smoked before we married so it wasn't a surprise to him. Your hubby will have to quit on his own, your pleading for him to quit will do nothing except make him continue to do so. He will, if her ever chooses to, quit for himself
2006-08-12 06:52:28 · answer #9 · answered by hipergirl22 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I no if they smoke they say its hard to stop try to point out gum or something. Remember the 1st week or so is the hardest the rest is pie.
2006-08-12 07:10:47 · answer #10 · answered by Emo Chick 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋