My Grandmother is fundamentalist Christian...?

Question

I am not. I spoke to her for the first time in a long time yesterday, and she is planning to visit my family, which I am happy about, but religion always comes up. I have tried reasoning with her about it, to no avail. How can I, being agnostic, deal with this situation without being offensive? Should I take my ordination as an agnostic priest down? Should I hide who I am to make her happy? I just don't know. Any thoughts? To pre-emt all of the "you should convert" statements, No. I am very secure in my "Truth". I just don't want to be offensive to my Grandmother.

Skypilot: Give me an email or something if you want an anwer to your question. I know it seems odd, but the real truth is that no one know.

Answer 1

She's family and she's elderly. I'd just try not to offend her. If the subject comes up change it or find an excuse to leave the room.
It's not fair that you should have to hide yourself but in this circumstance I think it would be the easiest route.

Answer 2

Compromise is not always an evil thing depending on what and who the the compromise is for. If, and I'm not saying you should, take down your ordination certificate (if that is what it is) and she doesn't see it is she likely to bring up the subject of religion? If she won't then that may be a way to keep it off that topic and yes it is a small sacrifice on your part but we all make sacrifices for people we do love even if it isn't always a sacrifice we really agree with.

If she still brings up the subject of religion then you can gently but firmly tell her that you respect her beliefs and her right to them but that you are happy in your beliefs. Perhaps th at would end it right there. A lot of people will 'push' if there are no set limits, if they know where the limits are many will not push past those.

I sincerely wish you the best in this situation.

Answer 3

You don't need to do anything at all. Just enjoy the visit. Say that very nice, i'll think about it when she brings up the religion thing and ask how she has been feeling. This is an opening that few older people can resist.

She is Granny, Just love her. Soon she will be gone and she will understand that all that foolishness about only one correct way to God was all nonsense.

Love and blessings
don

Answer 4

An agnostic is someone who does not reject the possibility of God's existence (as an atheist does) but someone who claims they simply do not know if He exists and wants to see proof. I have two questions:

1) How can you be an 'agnostic' priest?
2) How can you be secure in your 'truth' since you claim you don't know the truth about whether or not God exists?

Just asking, that's all.

Answer 5

I have a cousin who is a fundamentalist Christian. To his face I play along yes cousin Jesus is wonderful. I even learned a little about the Bible so that when he says God smited new orleans because of gay people I could say thats silly Danny look in Genesis chapter 8 verse 21 where God promises not to flood the Earth again. It made him think cause it was something God said in the Bible.

It doesn't make sense to convert people like that or disconvert. Just to play along and say well lets see what does the Bible really say. Jesus is really all about being loving and forgiving, and outside of the worship God part, which no one can really prove you did or didnt do in your head, the rest of it, dont steal dont lie dont murder, you should be doing that stuff already cause your a decent human being.

If the topic comes up about gay marriage, I would just say I don't see what the fuss is about its already illegal in 48 states.

That topic you should avoid, cause according to the BIble Jesus really did hate gay people. Don't listen to those who tell you Jesus loves the sinner but hates the sin, he hated gays. Its in Romans 1 24-27 and 1 corinthians 6:9

nothing is more damaging to the religious right then 1 corinthians where paul states specifically that homosexuals will not see heaven

so, play along, say yes we love jesus,

why argue

behind my cousins back i point out all his hypocrisys and all the flaws with the bible, never to his face, and the people i talk with they know when hes there i play along

Answer 6

It depends on your relationship with her. I've kept my disbelief from some members of my family - mostly because it seems to make them happier, and it's nice to make your family members happy. I tend in these situations just to take the topic away from religion whenever it comes up. But I don't know if she asks pointed questions like 'have you been to Church lately?' as I don't have much of that kind of stuff in my family.

I'm not sure if this is much of an answer...

Answer 7

I had an uncle who used to do the same. I just never answer him or say a word when he started to talk about religion. And that was all the time. Finally, he got the point. Or got tired of talking to a wall/

Answer 8

some people have had to cut ties with family. You should tell your grandmother you disown her for not respecting your beliefs. Ive read through many posts from many ex christians. there are many options, you could talk at length with your mom or dad about how granny is making your life a hell, you could tell granny shes being rude and disrespectful, then you could resort to the final step, telling granny shes no longer welcome where you are because shes being annoying.

Answer 9

I believe was Shakespeare who said "To thine own self be true." No, don't take down your agnostic ordination. You accept your grandmother for who she is, and it is up to her to accept you for who you are. As long as you don't insult her and her beliefs, you are free to state your own. How else will you be able to respect yourself? And no, do not convert. Christianity is a form of insanity. (It's okay for me to to insult her beliefs, she's not my grandmother!)

"A thorough reading and understanding of the Bible is the surest path to atheism." ~ Donald Morgan

"The Bible was written by barbarians in a barbarous, coarse and vulgar age." ~Robert Green Ingersoll

Answer 10

What the hell is wrong with you? Have some damn guts. Her being your grandmother gives her no right to try to force her religion onto you. And you damn well don't have to hide your beliefs to make the old bigot happy. And you're the one worried about being offensive?!! Have some damn courage.