I have been doing little things to push my boyfriend away.(such as not trusting him completely, checking up on him, and being a real ***** to him at times) I love him so much and don't want to lose him, I am just so jealous and I need to get over that or I will lose the best man I have ever had. He is so good to me and I just want to know how I can be better so I can have his heart and make him feel loved. I do love him but he gets so mad when I am jealous or check up on him. I want to make this work- anybody please give me advice, how do I quit my jealousy when it is part of my personality? And how do I learn to completely trust him?
2006-08-12 00:22:06 · 6 answers · asked by sarah 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You know that's just quite simple.. I've been through that - I've done all the things that you've said... But I guess I'm in a worse case - he wasn't my boyfriend. We only had a mutual understanding - but we never was a 'couple'
Anyway, you don't need to feel jealous - why? Because it's YOU he loves and nobody else. Feel confident about your position - being the GIRLFRIEND. A position only one special girl could get. And girl, good news - you're that special girl!!!
Besides, see the bright side - jealousy is just a sign that you love him very much!! That's why you're jealous - because you want him only for yourself. But don't worry, he's all yours. He won't go away.
And mind you, he's getting mad at you when you're jealous because he wants you to understand that it's YOU he loves and no one else. Every time you become jealous becomes an insult to him that makes him feel that his love is not enough.
Show him that his love is very enough, very enough for you to be confident that he's all yours.
You could trust him completely because you love him. Why doubt someone you love?
Right?
Oh well... I'm not sure if everything I said was a good advice, but I just hope it could help.
2006-08-12 00:33:02 · answer #1 · answered by Pseudosophy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know where you're coming from. I used to feel the same way about my exboyfriend. I don't feel that way with my current boyfriend b/c he goes out of his way to make me feel secure.
Sit down and talk to your boyfriend. Tell him that you know that this drives him nuts and you really want to change. The reason you feel that way is just personal insecurity. It may have nothing to do with him. Just let him know that it'd really help if he could tell you sometimes that you're beautiful and you're the only girl for him; make sure he knows that you need reassurance. And the more attention and love he gives you, the more secure you will feel in your relationship.
The problem really is that he hasn't gained your trust yet. Once he does, you'll feel a lot better.
As far as what you can do, make a concentrated effort to not act on the way you feel. When you start having suspicions or doubts, sit down and ask yourself, "Why do I feel this way?" Pinpoint exactly what is causing you to want to check up on him. Has he done or said something suspicious? If not, go out and get yourself busy. If you are occupied doing something, then you won't be sitting around thinking about what he might doing. If he goes out with friends, then you do the same.
Hope I've helped! I know those feelings are hard to deal with.
2006-08-12 07:27:59 · answer #2 · answered by Cy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you love him like you say then you have to trust him also. You have to give a little space for him to breath sometimes and that doesn't mean he is going to run away and cheat with someone and if he ever does then you will have to move on and it want be the end of the world. So just relax and enjoy your relationship with your bf and stop being so jealous of him or he will leave you. Take Care
2006-08-12 07:32:04 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Part of your personality??? I'm not sure about that. Insecure a little?? That's more likely--without TRUST there is no realtionship--Trust is one of the main foundations when in a relationship--if you don't have trust, you have nothing. If you really love this guy you have to take a risk and trust him. Your lack of TRUST is what's going to be your downfall. Trust him until he gives you reason not to--get past your own insecurities--until you do, you will only drive yourself, and him crazy.
2006-08-12 07:28:29 · answer #4 · answered by irish4life 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By correcting your thinking only and making him to know you better of what exactly you are to him.
2006-08-12 07:25:50 · answer #5 · answered by mkm 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to show love to get love-good luck
2006-08-12 07:25:00 · answer #6 · answered by kissie623 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋