Parents, did you ever hit your children? If so, how do you feel about it?

Question

Do you think it is ever justified as a tool of discipline?

i don't have children yet and am not looking after any children either. i asked this question to learn from your experiences. thanks a lot for all your answers.

Answer 1

I think it can be a discipline if used in the right way. Never hit a child out of anger. Send them to their room for a while and once you calm down you can render a spanking. There IS a difference between a spanking and a beating.

Answer 2

There is a difference between "hitting" and "spanking" - if none other than a psychological/emotional difference. Those who say not to seem to be generalizing or missing the point. It is never okay to hit out of anger or frustration. A spanking, if done correctly, is a method of disciplining, not punishing. It's done to get quick attention and show seriousness with an issue. It should be done calmly. It should be done privately (out of respect for the child, so he/she doesn't get embarrassed). It should be done on the bottom (not the hand, face, etc.). It should always be followed up with a hug and conversation about the reasons, what to do next time, etc. Spankings should be used mostly between the ages of 2-5.

Answer 3

I have swatted my son before, and I think it is a time tested tool for discipline. I think one of the best times to use a swat on the behind is the best way to get their immediate focus. However, it definitely doesn't work with all kids. I know my son doesn't give 2 hoots about his hands or anything else getting smacked. He simply doesn't care so it doesn't grab his attention. But for a lot of kids, it does work. Time-out is a great discipline tool, too, but again, time-out doesn't work with all kids. Discipline methods should be chosen based upon the child's temperament, and spanking is a perefctly viable option. The only parent who absolutely shouldn't use spanking as a punishment is one who has an anger management problem or has lost control before.

Answer 4

Yes, but not abusively. and before you "do-gooders" say that you shouldn't bacause you're bitter about your own parents giving you a smack now and again, grow up.
The world isn't all flowers and bunnies.
And a child that can barely talk isn't going to care about a conversation about moral fibre, or reasons WHY something was right or wrong.
A child that can talk will still think that they are right, no matter how well you reason with them.

A quick, short spank on the bottom drives home that "X" IS wrong and unacceptible, because YOU say so, and that it is not up for argument. It's not abuse, it's raising your children to respect you when all else fails.

Everyone I've spoken to of my generation (and above) that was spanked as a child for disciplinary purposes hated it at the time, and now agree that they're better people for it.
We look at some of the little $hit$ behaviour now and think "I would NEVER have acted like that!" - not because we were just better people, but because there were consequences.
Now we have a country full of chav/ned/whatevers ruining society because they have grown up without fear of any repercussion of their actions until they're old enough to get a panel (which is more likely to send them to Disney than punish them), and before they know it, it's jail.
I don't blame them for this - I blame the way they are raised - without discipline.
I'd rather my child got a smack for extreme misbehaviour, and learned to respect authority figures now, than 10 years from now he's turned into one of the obnoxious brats who shouts abuse at the police and breaks every law in sight.

If you think you can raise a child properly without it, then fine - but in my experience, it's not likely.

Answer 5

there is nothing wrong with a spanking yes i spank my kids but only when they are being totally defiant and disrespectful they also know certain behavior is not tolerated at home or by the law ( i hardly ever have to spank because i have taught them by example on how to behave) my 12 yr old has probably had 5 spankings her whole life my three other children (ages 9 3 4) have been spanked but very few times. and anytime someone makes a comment on their behavior it is always positive they are well behaved respectful kids at home and anywhere they go i can go anywhere with them and not have to worry about any type of tantrum yes spanking is a justifiable tool for discipline

Answer 6

I'm not a parent and I've never hit a kid but I've been hit by a vile woman i am supposed to call mother! i got scarred on the face for not sweeping the house properly and she usesd to put my neck between her legs and work my back with a hosepipe.i thought what she was doing was normal until i went ot a boarding school and discovered how happy other kids were. Pple could sense i was strange but no one really understood and i didnt tell anyone because i was always scared and never confident.

i think it is not justified as a tool of discipline for parents to hit their children it affects them negatively in many ways.

It hurts them more than it builds them so therefore its not right. If you are doing it STOP!find other ways like putting extra chores, grounding or starting a curfew or something.

Answer 7

I have spanked my kids, but I always discussed with them afterwards why I did it and how I wanted them to behave in the future. They are now 12, 10 and 3 and I rarely have to discipline them at all. A stern look is all it takes if they seem to be getting out of line. They're great kids, I'm very proud of them. (and I tell them THAT all the time too) :) I tried timeouts and they just weren't for me because you stick your kid in a corner and abandon them there. Most people who stick their kids in timeout never talk to their kids about it and the kid goes right back to doing what he was doing to get there in the first place!

HOWEVER, I believe each person should discipline in whatever way works for them, personally. No matter what, all children respond to different disciplines in different ways...and you've gotta pick what works best for you and your child.

Answer 8

I have a 1 year old and I have swatted her hand a few times to get my point across to her and I have worked my nephews over with a switch or my belt. In the end I was not the least bit sorry. Children need to know there are boundaries and corporal punishment drives that point home. Not all kids need to be spanked, some only need a firm word to put them in line and others need to have their back sides tanned. If you are prone to losing you temper than I would suggest that you send them to their room until you cool down THEN whip them.

Answer 9

I dont have any kids, I am 26. But my parents spanked me when I was bad, and now that I am grown, I feel that I am a better person because they did. Even growing up I noticed the other kids that werent disciplined, were out of control, or rude and unmanageable. Me and my brother are both for it.

Answer 10

I'm not a parent but I answer because this is something I've been askign a lot of people about. It seems that the current parent generation is all against it, claiming it's child-abuse.

All of the people i've asked in my generation are for hitting of children for discipline.. But never too hard.

I'm for it.... Along with verbal discipline.