Three year old terror.....?

Question

I have three children. My girls are 9 and 5. My son is 3. I use to say I had good children, til my son was born. He is into everything...we have had to put locks on the fridge, the pantry, his sisters rooms.....everything. I tried spanking him once, he laughed. He sits in time out, gets out and does something else....nothing seems to phase him at all. He is not spoiled and is not allowed to do whatever he wants. I just have no idea what else to do. He has been sent to bed right after dinner, spent a ton of time in his room with no toys or tv...NOTHING BOTHERS HIM!!!!!
Help me!!!!!

no it isn't that he is into the food, he just gets into everything and I got tired of finding old food in his room.....and of him trashing my pantry, dumping milk, etc.....he is a very healthy eater..ie he eats his fruits and veggies and such....loves water....etc.

Answer 1

The way I dealt with my kids when they went through a stage like that (they all had terrible 3's instead of 2's) is I tried to talk to them at a good moment and explain what was expected of them and tell them ahead of time what would happen if they broke a rule. My 2 1/2 year old can recite all the rules before we head into a store. I would also wait until after they calmed down after a punishment to explain why they were in trouble and also explain that if they did it again the same would happen.

I suggest trying to keep your child active. Take him outside regularly to burn some excess energy. When you sense that he is about to act up, maybe try stopping what you are doing and taking him for a relaxing walk.

As for punishments: Time outs worked on one, and taking a toy away worked on another. Try to figure out what he likes and would miss the most and use that as the punishment. For my son, punishing didn't work at first so I found a "hobby" that he loved which was helping me cook. I let him do it for a couple of days and then when he acted up I told him he wasn't being a big boy and only big boys could help me cook. Then later I would remind him if he kept acting up he couldn't help me the next time either. If he doesn't like cooking, try introducing arts and crafts, a special singing and/or dancing time, a regular trip to the park, etc. As long as he is behaving he can enjoy these treats if not then don't let him. It will give him something to miss while in his room.

Remember anything you do, handle out of love not anger. Make sure you remind him that while you don't like what he is doing you still love him. Also, sometimes kids act up for attention. My sis works at a daycare with 2 year-olds. She gives several random hug times every day and said after she started it, she was amazed at how much better the "bad" kids began acting.

Make sure you stay constant with your punishments and don't threaten if you don't intend to follow through. Good luck.

Here's a good site on discipline vs. punishment maybe it can help you. http://www.nncc.org/Prof.Dev/fcc.curriculum/sg.ch2.html

Answer 2

its probably just a phase he is going through. usually during the ages of 2-3 kids try testing the limits of the parents. you need to start teaching him simple things such as manners and respect so that he eventually grows out of this phase and understands what is acceptable and what is not acceptable. Try barney tapes that focus on basic things like manners and respect. seriously this stuff works. and also you have to reinforce it. When he wants something tell him 'say please' or 'use your manners' and if he does something bad tell him he isnt respecting others and he needs to do that. try putting him in timeout in a boring place that he cannot escape such as a corner on a stool where you can keep an eye on him. its all about YOU being the parent and staying in control.

Answer 3

He sounds just like my son. I constantly have to keep my eye on him. He will write on walls and furniture, if he finds a pen. Constantly pulling things out of the fridge. Into all the cabinets (has learned to open the child safety lock). Do you stay home with him during the day? I stay home with my son, and I think my son may be bored. So I have started taking him to the park and going to the library. Doing activities with him to help keep him occupied. It is a lot less stressful to keep him doing productive things, than constantly following him around, fussing and having to clean up the things that were unproductive.

Answer 4

This may sound cheezy but your best bet would be to try to read up on some parenting books or child behavior books. If that doesn't help there may be a deeper root to the problem and you may need to seek some professional help. I believe Dr. Phil has one out on family first, so does Super Nanny as well as try subscribing to a parenting magazine, not only would it give great tips but would have new ideas on activities for the kids and product recalls & things.

Answer 5

I'm sorry to say you have a real boy on your hands. My little boy is the same way. I went crying to my cousin one time. She has 5 boys and told me the same thing, they are just boys being boys. If he's not hurting himself or sombody else just let him be him. If he is hurting himself or somebody else or being destructive you have to discipline him. If you have tried everything and it doesn't work the only thing to do is take things away. Take his toys, take his t.v. time, I hate to say it but if he likes bathtime take that for 2 days. Remember though that the punishment has got to fit the crime. For instance if he is throwing his blocks, take them away for a week. If he is going into his sisters room, take him out and put him in the corner for a while. If he is running in the house make him come back and walk to his destination. Oh and be sure to say things like "remember the no running rule" you should never say "don't or no" always say do whatever it is you want them to do.

Answer 6

You have a very bad three year old on your hands. All children have different personalities. Hang in there, try to be as consistent with disipline as you can be and wait this out.

Answer 7

maybe he is eating food with too much preservative's that can cause behaviour problems

Answer 8

maybe the good lord thought he should show you what its like to have a normal child....lol....hes just looking for attention...give it to him.

Answer 9

so his problem is he eats too much? if it is, let him. he'll regret the fact that he's fat, or has diabeties in the future.