Is it harder to date when you are 30 something?

Question

I feel so depressed right now that I am sitting here with tears in my eyes. I feel like everyone in the world is in love and has a man but me. I can't understand for the life of me why I don't attract anyone. I've been single for over a year, I'm 32, I have a good job, nice home, nice car, nice shape and a pretty face but no man. I go out to night clubs, libraries, grocery stores, book stores, and different venues to meet men but I still don't meet anyone and it is driving me crazy. When I was single and 25, I had no problems attracting men and I had them lined up, but now that I am 32, it seems everyone has someone or they are married. Is it harder to get someone when you are 30 something or is it just me?

Answer 1

hi, I'm also thirty something and single. It sounds like things are going well for you other than being happy in the dating dept. I would be pretty damn proud of all that you have accomplished, that's great.

as far as dating, don't be in a hurry, go out with your girl friends and have a good time, that's what I do. Some of the men you meet.... might be a guy to go out with but they can add alot of drama to your life, might not be as together with their life as you are. I'm enjoying my single life. A great guy will probably come along when you don't even realize it.

Answer 2

the problem is you DON'T want to be with someone, it not hard at all to find a guy.. nightclubs is not the place, guys only want one thing there, you and they both know it. I know women just like you, they have an innate fear of commitment, they afaird of losing all that they have gained so hard for.. oddly enough it's the same thing they fear, they work hard to get all they got and in the end they do not want to share not only what they have but there hearts. the will hook up, form way too fast bonds, and then over pressure the prospective mate.. and then the prospective mate freaks out with the sense of desperation that women can come to te table with, and it scares men. a long term relationship cannot be rushed, divorce rates back me up on that one. unfortunately for women today, the rules have changed, there is no longer a benefit for men to marry, what when he can be challanged at every turn by a women, he realize his value economically now is also been marginalized, therefore his need in a given relationship is questionable, and thus why commit? reports are coming out that men are better off financially. most women will not commit in a unmarried relationship for a long term relationship, the want that contract ( what marriage really is as the law see is ) so in case of failure they have economic reporcussion to bear against the man, it's rare that you hear fair and equitable dissolutions. as women age their value to men drops, once child bearing age passes even more so. we have the highest amount of singles in any time in US history, a sure signal of the climate change in dating. men are no longer allowed to be men, and are often the worse off out of a divorce. it's no wonder a few men will pat another on the back and congradulate him when he marry, if anything he waits for the day when he gets the phone call from his friend annoucing the inevitable seperation.
no doubt you have either unrealstic standards for men or you used them as you say since you had them lined up, and therefore have forgotten how to be a appelaing ( feminine ) and a women, and thus your outcome

Answer 3

Could you be trying to hard now? Divorce lowers
self esteem. Thats just a natural part of it,even
for the one who wanted the divorce.
You have to allow some time for your hope
and your confidence to come back,& you can't
rush things like that. It may look like everyone
has someone,but thats not really true.
There are so many lonely people looking for
love. It's not easy to find someone special at
any age they say,so don't be harsh on your
self!!!
Take time and enjoy your freedom and your
life!!! Gurl is all about you now! have a coming
out party so to speak!!! Some people even
celebrate their divorce and throw a party!
Yes,and they even have cards available that
really say things like, "Congrats on your -
Divorce' !!!!
Divorce doesn't have to leave you feeling
alone and desperate,or like you must hurry
and find someone else.
Like yourself and others will too.
It's hard at first,but you'll see.ok?
Just hang on awhile longer,and let things flow
naturally.
I hear this site called,: www.lovehappens.com
is a good place to meet other people.
I hope you cheer up and meet a great man
very soon!

Answer 4

First of all, stop your crying. In my situation, I had been single from 18 years up to 35 years old with no man in site. I used to wonder, what was wrong with me? I was smart, attractive, had a good job but no man wanted me. I was desperate then you know what happened? I stopped, whining when I was told I would find love when I least expect it. You know what? At the age of 36 years I am dating a wonderful, kind man beyond all of my expectations. If this could happen to me, it too will happen to you when you least expect it. So cheer up--life does begin after 30!

Answer 5

Don't feel bad for yourself. I might not be the best person to give you advice. I am an over 50 divorced male. I do not understand why a woman needs a man. I do not need a woman. I have enjoyed relationships since my divorce 15 years ago. I have found that women come to me as needy. They need me to fulfill a perception that there is something lacking in their life. My advice is to love yourself first. You are the best.

Answer 6

HAve you tried to ask a guy out. you only been single 1 yr whats the problem. I have been single for 10 yrs. Yes most people in our age groups are married so what. You just might have to take control of your life and ask some one out. Don't let get you down time is on your side you have plenty left

Answer 7

not at all. but then again it all comes down to what sort of man your looking for... i know alot of people about your age that have had some great luck with this site....

www.plentyoffish.com

its a totaly free site so you have nothing at all to lose. other than that the only advice i can give you is be yourself and the right man will show up. keep your chin up and smile once in a while no man wants to be with a depressing woman. lol so sweety good luck out there and i wish you all the best in your search for love.

xoxoxo

Answer 8

The more you try the more they will avoid you. It's really strange but I am 39 divorced, bitter, but actually don't mind being by myself... The funny part is...The more I don't really care about men, the more they try to get with me. It is actually hilarious! I especially have all these young guys trying to pick up on me and for the life of me I cannot understand why!!! The only thing i can think of is maybe they can see my confidence. Maybe when a woman is strong and does'nt NEED a man..maybe that appeals to them?? However it took a while to get the I don't give a crap additude.... Good luck to you

Answer 9

You've got to be kidding us. You'rre an attractive woman who goes out and doesn't hook up?

I think you have a pigeon hole idea about the exact man you want. Just go out and get some girl! The right thing will happen that way. You pick and choose- get the ball rolling.

Just be social and brush your hair.

Answer 10

i'm 38 and performance no issues looking dates.......and under no circumstances with youthful adult men. i think that i look extra effective now then I did at the same time as i become youthful, i'm particular contained in the heck smarter and that i dont ever experience in competition with young women human beings. One, because i'm extra mature and comprehend what i favor in existence and in an significant different. There aren't any if ands or buts about that one.