I sit here in wanton caloric transgression guys...Due to my weakened state I have taken a box of cookies and eaten several ( at least 5-6) with feelings of temptation to eat more. Have I sinned against the calorie gods ? Will they now feel free to come and smite me in the thighs and buttocks ? Will they unleash the fat fairies with cellulite vengeance and punish me for my skinniness ? Even now I feel their anger and those cookie demons are calling out to me, " Annie...we want you ! You want us ! Come and devour us !! "...Shall I hit the road and jog 3 miles to repent of my cookie sins ? Or should I be enslaved here to my sit ups...and eat low fat for a week ...consuming diet cokes for breakfast lunch and dinner ? Can anyone direst me to a mantra to chant that will free me from this cookie passion ?
2006-08-11 17:24:53 · 17 answers · asked by ? 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
I hear 'ya.
I too have sinned.
Go to bed... tomorrow is another day -- try drinking a ton of water to the point of oblivion and realize you can have cookies again some day, just choose water and more water and more water.... what I think for me is that if I can't have just 1 or 2, which I can't cuz I'll eat the whole bag/box, then don't start with just that one.... too risky, too good, too hard .... better to not go down that slippery slope -- is it worth it?
2006-08-11 17:30:15 · answer #1 · answered by missy_goob 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As an atheist, I am pleased to inform you that there are no calorie gods or cookie demons. (I know some fat fairies, but they wouldn't think of hurting you.) Your guilt is superstitious and totally irrational.
But maybe next time you should eat a real dinner before you get hungry enough to be tempted.
In sugar-free sacrilege, S.
2006-08-11 17:49:18 · answer #2 · answered by Sasha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Drop the cookies and step away from the box!! DO IT NOW!! Okay now just take a couple of deep breaths.... that's it... get control of yourself man, resist the tempting siren's song of the delicious, sweet taste of those delightful cookies... crunching and melting in your mouth into rivers of flavor and wanton ecstacy.
Dammit now I gotta go get some. See what you've done!
2006-08-11 17:35:51 · answer #3 · answered by eggman 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All hail the Great Cookie Monster!
Let the almighty chocolate chips fall where they may!
2006-08-11 17:29:23 · answer #4 · answered by oaksterdamhippiechick 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It does no longer extremely say God instructed him to take the census, it says one incited David to take the census. earlier on God had set down the command that a census of Israel might want to no longer be taken, because of this God's anger grew warm and become David's sin.
2016-11-29 23:15:22 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well cookies do kick ***
and well there are other ways to eat them with out the guilt
try crunchin' two cookies into a bowl
add shreddies
add milk
less cookies
still full
kinda healthy
2006-08-11 17:35:08 · answer #6 · answered by lost 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if they are chocolate chip or peanut butter cookies (unless you are allergic) then i suggest that you eat the whole box of cookies. you can always work off the calories later.
2006-08-12 14:06:03 · answer #7 · answered by Lexi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thought from that picture that your fanny was looking a little wide! Lay off the cookies young lady! God don't like no fat @sses.
2006-08-11 17:34:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Atkins, Atkins, Atkins, Atkins, Atkins.
Thanks for the 2 points.
2006-08-11 17:41:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send me 200$ and I will find you salvation.
At least the calorie gods have real repercussions.
2006-08-11 17:30:18 · answer #10 · answered by whajd 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋