I am a single mother of a beautiful little girl. I have gotten attention from guys with my personality and i have had the ones you cant get rid of. I want to know why a guy runs when he sees a picture or when he finds out you are a mom? I have had this problem for a while now. Dont get me wrong i still date and all im just ready to settle down and share my life with someone. So why are guys so fast to jump the gun when i could be the one?
2006-08-11 14:46:46 · 24 answers · asked by mldwild 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
men our just scared that the " extra baggage " is going to get into the way of the relationship...if he aint man enough to step up and not be a pussy about you having a baby then he aitn worth it hunni....THEY SCARED OF A REAL WOMEN!you doing you and supporting your daugther ma...stay strong
2006-08-11 14:55:18 · answer #1 · answered by Sexy LoVe 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I haven't had a hard time because I make it know before I even start dating someone. I am up front about it. The best way I weeded through the pretenders was by on-line dating. It was my way to research the guy before investing my heart. You need to be honest, up front, and don't hide the fact that you have one of the most important jobs on this planet...Mom. You are a mother first, and some guys do not want to compete with kids. The other issue could be that they may think you are looking for a meal ticket for your family. That will send a guy running right away.
2006-08-11 14:56:42 · answer #2 · answered by Marilyn C 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some men are just not ready to have kids, just like some women aren't. It is unfair to expect someone to just accept a child of yours because they have been attentive to you due to your charming personality. Age and maturity have a lot to do with this, too. For example, at 24, I met someone who was 26, beautiful, and had a wonderful little daughter. The little girl was perfect, but I was not anywhere near ready to take on fatherhood responsibilities and thus didn't let the relationship evolve. It was nothing personal about the woman or her child, and I wish them both the best. I think that was a better decision than pretending that I was ready for something I was not or leading on a woman AND her young daughter selfishly when I was not prepared for a long-term relationship with a ready-made family.
2006-08-11 14:54:46 · answer #3 · answered by LaNell the Relationship Expert 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Single men do not like single mothers because children are expensive and sometimes a nuisance. If I were dating a single mother, I would immediately be concerned about being used by the single mother to provide for her children and herself. And no one really wants to raise someone else's children when they have none of their own. You would have much better luck dating men with children already. Just because a man does not want to jump into a relationship that will be a major burden does not mean he is not a "real man" or that he is selfish or anything. It just means that he is not willing to pay for someone else's indiscretion or irresponsibility. You left out the details of how you became a single mother, but I suspect you are a single mother because you got pregnant out of marriage or your boyfriend deserted you. Either way, it is not the responsibility of the men you are dating now to pick up the slack. But many of us who consider that a problem would mind a widow's children less than children who are raised by a single mother who became single through divorce or desertion or similar means. So if you're a widow, it would be easier for men to accept your children. Anyway, good luck finding someone!
2006-08-11 15:07:53 · answer #4 · answered by anonymous 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Kids are a big part of life, they are expencive and take a lot of time. Don't get me wrong i love kids but there is a time and a place to have them.
Relationships start off unstable, they take time to become solid and well rounded. Then by adding a child to the mix it just seems to unstable for most to try. You'll find someone who is willing to take the risk and it will make it all worth while.
Best of luck.
2006-08-11 14:51:45 · answer #5 · answered by Chris H 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dear, lets be honest: You have a "ready made family", and you should probably be with a man who HAS CHILDREN ALSO. I'm single and childfree--and I DO NOT want to be with a man with children---I have that right. The men who run away from you have the right also. Listen, when you decided to enter into single motherhood (or divorce your husband)--that is the decision that you made--and this is all that goes along with it.
Just be thankful for your daughter--and only date men who also have children.
Peace
2006-08-11 14:52:57 · answer #6 · answered by Plus-Sized &Proud 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
There are guys out there..there just harder to find. I know what you mean...I am a divorced mother of 3. But I got lucky and found a guy that loves my kids like his own. So many fish in that sea...just keep fishin and throw the bad ones back. good luck
2006-08-11 14:50:42 · answer #7 · answered by jessdjnick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe try a single dad?
I've had exactly the same experience like u did.
It's great u r honest and open up to yr guy and let him now u're single mom. Someday someone may just come along... stick to ur faith.
2006-08-11 15:24:41 · answer #8 · answered by ho R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately for most men, they have to gradually be put into the father role. If he sees that you're a mom already, then he's already being thrust into the 'father' role (in his mind). Men just want to have fun and get to know a lady first. If you're with child, it's seen as 'baggage' that most men can't handle. Men have it hard enough just trying to deal with you by yourself, they don't want the hassle of having to do by your schedule and your child's schedule too.
It's bad enough that you have night that you're "washing your hair" but to add "oh, my baby is sick..." that would turn any guy off...
Good luck with dating nonetheless.
2006-08-11 14:55:07 · answer #9 · answered by DarthFangNutts 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think of a few men do no longer go with to ought to attend to human beings's infants. They comprehend in the event that they get right into a dating with you that the youngsters will constantly be there, and that your interest will settle for to the youngsters incredibly than to him now and lower back. men often do no longer go with to share your interest, and that they do no longer seem to be constantly good with infants. additionally, having a duty for infants means which you do no longer constantly have privateness, and which you won't be ready to circulate out as much as women folk without infants. men on your age team nevertheless go with to circulate out and not ought to rigidity approximately something yet having a competent time. given which you're so youthful, you're assembly men on your age team who won't be waiting for that form of duty. Your superb guess is to fulfill men who've their own infants, and who love infants and understand what parenting is already approximately. those men could be above your age team, so shop an open techniques. good success!
2016-12-11 07:13:07 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand where you are coming from. I was a single dad for awhile. Just something about an instant family I guess scares people
2006-08-11 14:49:56 · answer #11 · answered by gunrunner 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋