This is your BEST-childhood-FRIEND, she makes her announcement about her pregnancy with a man she just met only a few months ago... to HER friends, meaning they are not your friends, but you know of them & they know OF you. For no reason, she also tells them in her closing paraphraph...by the way, "Jane" is looking into adoption because she has medical issue (she gave them every detail of the medical issues).
Would you be mad at you bestfriend if what you told her in confidence about your hopes to adopt since you can't have biological children were splattered all over the net to people you know, but don't speak to???
Oh and this big mouth friend is a R.N. and should know better about leaking medical information!
What would you do????
Also...in this email, she lied about her age, about the father-to-be's occupation & his age. (she's 13+yrs older then he). One of HER friends forwarded the email, is how you found out!
2006-08-11 12:05:58 · 19 answers · asked by DeHuntres 2 in Health ➔ Other - Health
She doesn't sound like a very good friend if you ask me. It also sounds like she has a lot of personal issues and is perhaps trying to make herself feel better by "trashing" you. In my opinion? Find a better, more supportive, friend. I am so sorry she did that to you and I know it must be painful. My first step would be to talk with her one-on-one and let her know how you feel. Gauge her response for sincerity, and if she is lacking, then good riddance! I've had friends who would do stuff like that to me in the past, and a good thing to do is distance yourself from her, if only to protect yourself! Best of luck, hang in there! (Any decent human being would know she's being nasty).
2006-08-11 12:18:55 · answer #1 · answered by natureutt78 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand why you would be upset, not only was a 'confidence broke but it is also a very sensitive situation. THINK what were her motives, as your friend, was she adding you in there cause she felt bad for you making this announcement? OR was it malicious? Ask her and tell her what you are feeling. & tell her why, point out that she would not appreciate the same , and move on. You need to do the last part though..... cause for one she is pregnant now and needs no stress from you, and two- really she is not bothered by this at all you are the only one who is... it will eat you all up if you let it... honest dont let it rent space in your head. There is better things in life that this turmoil... learn from it and move on.
PS if this is a first time offense... you absolutely must forgive , if stuff like this has happened before, well then.... cut your losses, take note& really really MOVE ON.
2006-08-11 12:15:33 · answer #2 · answered by DrVodka 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her how you feel, that while you are "happy" for her news, she had no business discussing your personal info with ANYONE. While your medical issue and adoption desires are NOTHING to be ashamed of, this should not have been discussed w/o your permission. Adoption is such a great and whole-hearted venture. I wish you the best.
Maybe you should consider backing off from her a bit. She may not have meant it maliciously, but distancing yourself wouldn't be wrong. JUST be polite. Even though she wasn't. Yet, if your friendship has lasted this long, there must be enough good for you to overlook some of the bad.....
2006-08-11 12:16:04 · answer #3 · answered by not at home 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you have every right to be upset, angry even. Is this something she has done before, or is this a first time offense? If this is a first time thing then I would approach her with your concerns about her leaking your private information. There is nothing you can do about the lying other than ask why she did it and keep an eye out for more lies. If this is a frequent occurence, then I would re-evaluate the friendship to decide whether this is a relationship you can afford to live without. You don't want to be friends with someone who can't keep private information private.
2006-08-11 12:12:49 · answer #4 · answered by niuforever 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like the lady has some serious self-esteem issues. And, she obviously feels that what you share is less a friendship than a competition.
If it's worth it to you to confront her, forward her own email to her, from you, but don't append a message. Wait and see if she has the decency to give you a call. If she does and if there's a friendship left to salvage, you can get everything out in the open.
I'd be willing to bet you don't hear from her again, however. Given what you now know about her, you're better off without such friends.
2006-08-11 12:13:38 · answer #5 · answered by functionary01 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you didn't want to tell and she did the mistake of telling about your medical problems. She shouldn't have told if you didn't want it to be known. But you won't delete the memories or turn back time with your anger. I also have problems and will never be able to be a biological mother (Turner syndrome to be short) and I always felt something like...if a man wants a family, and knows I can't give him one, he won't love me...but I can be loved for what I am. What is wrong about wanting to adopt a baby? Like my doctor said to me, maternity is not a synonym of pregnancy or chidbirth, mother is the woman who takes care of a child, in good times and bad times. So you can be a mother and it is not the business of those friends how do yo do it.
2016-03-26 22:19:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your friend didn't mean any harm in this. She mentioned you and your baby troubles because she was on the topic of babies.
She subconsciencely told them every detail because she was hoping that perhaps someone would offer help and advice that might help you be able to conceive.
She likes to talk. She didn't mean any harm. Don't even bring it up to her.
The age and occupation thing is weird though. I think I'd ask her about that if the ages are way different. She's probably just embarrased about his occupation, don't smush it in her face. Be her best friend.
2006-08-11 12:11:08 · answer #7 · answered by Genie♥Angel 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have aYahoo email account, click SPAM and the next time she emails you she will get a message that says, "Recipient does not like you!" and she can't email you anymore. She is not your friend. I don't care how long you have known her. People grow apart sometimes as they get older. Stay away from her. Don't argue with her. Shun her. You are better off without her. What do they say....."With friends like that, who needs enemies?" I'm sorry you are hurting. That was very mean hearted.
2006-08-11 12:16:47 · answer #8 · answered by fishermanswife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! That totally tells you she's not a true friend!
she had no business in exposing your situation. Its completly wrong. I know i wouldnt of done this to my friends!
You should tell her off! Damn girl, if i was you i'd tell her off, and wait for her to have her baby then beat the **** out of her..but then again i can be very violent im not sure if thats you but.
my point is yes you really need to handle your business! and speak your mind! tell her off! scam with her man or something...jk but yeah shes dumb for what she did! but dont feel bad keep your head up shes not worth it.!
2006-08-11 12:12:33 · answer #9 · answered by CALI GIRL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't blame you for being upset at her rubbing your infertility in your face to people you don't even know. That was very tasteless of her.
But there's not much you can do about it. Wether she's in the healthcare field or not, she's not bound by HIPAA to protect your confidential history because of the conditions you told it to her under.
Best I can suggest is talk to her, and tell her how you felt about her divulging things that you told her in confidence.
Though, don't involve yourself in mentioning her lying about herself. It's none of your business.
2006-08-11 12:11:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋