I love her with all my heart but what can one do when one is in a relationship with a very moody female?

Question

We went to college together and were friend even before falling in love, we are from the same town back home in Africa. I have let everyone in my life know she is my queen and hopefully want to marry her someday, but she lets her mood soil everything. When she gets moody she says and does anything, not knowing that it hurts or seem to care. It is life she takes out her frustration on me and at one point it seemed like there was nothing I could ever do right. It has gotten to a point where I hate to say it but I started questioning my love for her. I love her with all my heart and just today I said somethings to her I did not mean to say but I told her to get help for her mood or I am leaving. I feel like I hurt her but I am hurt too. I really wished that she could try because I do really want to marry her some day but how can one marry someone that is always going to let their mood control every part of their behavior. She even has admitted to having a mood problem. Please advise

Answer 1

What causes her moodiness? Try to solve it. If she gets moody because you're a pig & leave the house a mess, CLEAN UP YOUR MESS! Or if she gets mad because you do the hitler wave, then stop acting stupid!!! Then she won't be upset. If you can't, then let her go or ignore her when she's moody.

if she's moody for no reason, then maybe she has some sort of mental problem. Some people are angry a lot, and agressive, it's a mood disorder & they need to be treated to live a normal life.

Answer 2

Well I feel that you did what any other person would do in your situation. You told her what was on your mind and it must have been bothering you enough that you said it, so maybe it wasn't in the best way but at least you got it out there on the table. It does sound like she needs a little something to help her get a grip on her emotions...there is nothing wrong with that and you need to tell her that...and tell her that you are also worried about her...you want her to be happy too, and when she is not happy neither are you. But it does not sound like you will make it much longer if she keeps going on the way that she is even if she is the love of your life remember you have to be the love of hers. Help her compromise, talk to her, tell her how it is making you feel.

Answer 3

I think in a serious relationship, and when you are with someone you truly love, you have to have sometimes A LOT of Patience, BUT, if there is love in both sides, each side will do whatever it takes to make your love of your life happy...

If she REALLY have a mood problem, then maybe she could get some help, try to calm down, have patience! And also maybe you can "change" some things or habits that maybe gets her angry, of course without loosing your identity, which makes you YOU!

I mean it's normal that sometimes girls get in a moody situation, maybe because we are going to be on our days, because hormones DO affect our behavior sometimes, BUT if she is like this ALWAYS, then she DOES have a mood problem... and if she really loves you she would be willing to change that... but SHE has to have the will, not you to force her to change...

And if she doesn't want to change, then think about your future, because a marriage is FOREVER! Will you be willing to have enough patience to go through ALL her moods? will you accept her as she is, with qualities and defects?

Don't forget to COMMUNICATE with her! not fighting, of course! tell her how you feel, stay calm if she start to get angry, explain to her things without getting angry... love her very much, but also think of your future life!

Also remember that if you give love, you will receive love...

Good Luck, and think about it!

Answer 4

Oh man I feel for you, I AM that moody female and I really dont mean to be. If she is a GEMINI we are just like that. But, if she is only this way with you then maybe she takes you for granted and is being selfish by taking her agression at the world out on you.
She would benefit from counseling and perhaps if you space yourself you will see her morph into a person who realises she is loosing someone she doesnt deserve and will change to keep you. You sound like a really nice guy and I totally feel for you. Dont be afraid to be brutally honest, she isnt afraid to hurt your feelings and hearing the truth may hurt but it will always be better in the long run.

Answer 5

Has she seen a doctor? There are many prescriptions out there that help with mood swings. I think it is great that she is recognizing it, that is the first step. You are a great guy for sticking by her and letting love conquer all, but don't let yourself be taken advantage of either. She needs to get help or learn to overcome these mood swings in order for her to live a happy life, because if she isn't happy you two will not be happy together.

Answer 6

i totally feel u here my gf is tha same way at times, but if you really love her u gotta stick by her...try to do things for her that will change that...and when there is nothing that pleases her just let her know you love her...ur gf may have things in her past that have really hurt her and made her this way maybe she needs u to be her King..to my her Rock to be that strong man that consoles her when she has her moods...anger, sadness, all these branch from fear..maybe there is something she is afraid of...just try to be all u can and if she doesnt change then just do what is best for you...realize that there has to be boundaries there is only so much u can do as a man to help her or to be there for her when youve done all you can its not ur fault it becomes her problem no longer yalls problem

Answer 7

pretty much all female have their mood swings, men have them too though not as often as us. you guys need to really talk about this and figure out how to deal with it. you should try to help her. since you know she's like this, try to develope a tougher skin and try not to take everything she says seriously when she's in these moods. if you really love her that much, you'll try the best you can to work it out. when you get to the point where you can't do it anymore, you know it's time to go, maybe she'll realise then that she ran you away with her mood swings. all the best man

Answer 8

Hey mate. I had the exact same situation as you. I resolved mine by telling her to grow up and stop acting like a little girl and the usual crap, then she stopped talking to me. I kinda do feel like I've lost a part of me, but it was for the best and feel like a lot is off my shoulders now. Act quickly, the longer you leave it, the worse it will get.

Answer 9

Wait until you and her are both calm and rational and sit down and be honest with her about how you feel and try to be as polite,
genteel as you can sometimes love isn't enough and it aint a good relationhip if you don't got to work at it. If you really love her and want her it is worth it! Don't be too proud for counseling either because it can work for both of you

Answer 10

You're doing the right thing. You want the relationship to work but she also needs to help. She needs to understand that you get hurt when she gets so upset and that it will never work if she continues to act that way. It's good that you value the relationship and the love you have for her, but also your peace of mind. Good Luck.