I'm not talking about divorce. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost five years - we've been living together for 3 and a half. Things are kind of rocky, but we are so much in love with each other neither one of us wants to give up. However, that might be the best decision? I just can't imagine my life without him, and I want to work things out.
What's your experience with this?
2006-08-11 08:28:12 · 19 answers · asked by Mrs. Brooks 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i would consider just going and doing something together, try to get the sparks back, i know this sounds corny, but maybe some kind of relationship counseling. i think if you guys are so in love, you shouldnt give up on something so good.
2006-08-11 08:32:17 · answer #1 · answered by missy_t_09 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It doesn't matter what anyone elses experiences are. Whats at the core of YOUR problem. Whats rocky with the relationship? You've got a solid foundation, and thats a good thing, so get back to basics and find out what the problem is.
And why aren't you married yet? living together for 3 and a half years? Might as well be already. make sure you give each other plenty of room to talk to each other about ANYTHING.
Get the problems out in the open so you can work on them.
2006-08-11 15:31:52 · answer #2 · answered by cloaked30m 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've been in a 6 year relationship... and a 3 year relationship... both ended. Breaking up after my 6 year was the best thing I could have ever done. Sometimes a breakup isn't always a bad thing. It opened my world up to so many things. My 3 year... I wish I could have married her... but we are still best friends. She'll always be in my life... but for now... we both get to experience a different way of life. It will be very difficult to concentrate at first... but eventually you will get to know yourself better and solidify you as a person. What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger and better I think.
2006-08-11 15:33:48 · answer #3 · answered by GQ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just got out of a 2years long relationship. I lived with him for a year and we were talking about being together and everything. but in the end, it just didn't work.
i think that no matter how many years you spend with that person, if things do not go well, the relationship will not work. you should not hold on to him just because you guys have been together for long time. but think about the relationship itself.
Good luck,
2006-08-11 15:50:45 · answer #4 · answered by lalala 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have had a couple of these. in fact, i am very blessed to be a father because of my most recent serious relationship. unfortunately, people change and relationships end. it is better to move on and begin the healing process rather than holding on to a destructive relationship. if you know it's not going to work, why fight for it? just realize that it takes time to get over it. It took me half the time my son's mother and I were together until I was finally over it. (So, for a five year relationship, expect up to two and a half years until you are completely over it and ready for a healthy romantic relationship.) that said, again, it is better to start the healing sooner than later.
the best way to determine if it's time to let go and move on is if you spend more time fighting about not fighting than you spend actually being happy.
best of luck.
2006-08-11 15:38:28 · answer #5 · answered by jimvalentinojr 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was with my ex for 7 years. We started dating when I was 17 and he was 21. We loved each other very much and to this day I still love him and would do just about anything for him. We had lived together but we eventually grew apart. He wanted one thing and I another. I don't regret the break up because we were young when we started out and I need to figure out who I was by myself, not who I was trying to be with him. I found that I am really out going and love to be social but when I was with him, I always let him be the one to socialize and I would just sit there and wait. If you guys know what you want and are happy with each other everything will fall into place. No one ever said the road wouldn't be bumpy but eventually it smooths out.
2006-08-11 15:35:46 · answer #6 · answered by Dreamer06 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its tough and it will take time. However, even after a few month of being apart, you might figure out that things weren't as bad as they seem. Often, problems derive from issues that went undiscussed and unresolved. I say talk about it, figure out exactly what's wrong and see what you can do to turn things around. If you do end up single, you won't be completely alone, you will have friends and family to help you out and you can always find some new. Good luck
2006-08-11 15:33:00 · answer #7 · answered by 4eyed zombie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe some councling would be good for ye both. Im just outta relationship after 6 years he finished with me and i was gutted but ur true friends really show when something like this happens Im glad i had good friends to give me advice and just to chat to its only four months but i couldnt imagine my life without him we were always with each other but now im out of my old routine and doing new things now but try counciling and c if it will help in anyway im sure it will Good luck
2006-08-11 15:35:40 · answer #8 · answered by Lisa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
time is the best healer
and love ends up when it is due
a fact of life
you 'll face it and survive it. No worries
it's not the end of the world but just a matter of time before you realize that you CAN really live without him
2006-08-11 15:32:43 · answer #9 · answered by Roland 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well I dated my boyfriend for a year and a half, of course things just didn't work out, but you know that you can always find someone else to love and your love will grow deeper and you may even love you next boyfriend more. it's hard since we just barely broke up but I know I will find someone new that I will love just as much or hopefully even more and more.
2006-08-11 15:32:15 · answer #10 · answered by kimber g 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋