well i m a second daughter in my family.now the problem is i don't know but i feel ignored from my parents. after a long time i started acting different from my family.here no one understands me.i sometimes fell like suciding.idon't know what to do.they give more attention to my sisty(my sisty loves me).
the problem is with my family.i feel like i m a adopted child.please help me.
2006-08-11 07:25:29 · 29 answers · asked by jass 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Hello dear dont panic and do something like suicide that is not the solution .Some parents forget about expressing love for their children although they love their children very much .The very fact that they are feeding you and living under one roof means a lot to the parents and a misunderstanding creeps in and the child usually the second one start to feel neglected although the parents still love her and forget to say it in words. The very fact that your sister loves you means that the parents also love you and has good things to say about you and are not saying it directly to you. If you talk directly to your parents and tell them they dont love you anymore at all you will get a surprise when they hug you and will clear your impression that they dont love you to be totally wrong .
2006-08-18 22:16:26 · answer #1 · answered by sumant b 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am the oldest of 4 and I felt like you when I was younger. My sibs pretty much got all the attention. I was supposed to be the authoritarian of the bunch. I was supposed to help with the kids. I felt as though I was the outsider. But you know what, if you talk to your sister and tell her your thoughts and fears, she will help you out. I would recommend you speak to someone you trust, but most of all, speak to your family. They are "the problem" and they should help you resolve your issues.
Don't kill yourself. Answer this, what would you and your family accomplish with this act. The only thing that would happen is 1) you didn't get the problem addressed and possibly resolved and 2) your family wouldn't know why and probably would say why didn't she say anything. We could have helped.
If after having told your family and no change, then depending on your age and your financial situation, you may want to take leave of them for a while.
Good Luck.
2006-08-17 06:09:40 · answer #2 · answered by geminigirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi there ya no it's crazy cause I feel the same way sometimes I'm 26 now and not married have a child but when I was growing up I had several people in my family ask my parents if I were adopted Of course I new that I wasn't I look just like my dad and mom both but it's the difference in the way they treat me other then my sister I love her deeply and never have blamed her, but she does constantly try for there love ever now she is older and has 2 kids - she is married - but I've always been considered the black sheep are you? I don't know what to tell you, other then stop worrying about it just live your life and do the best you can and soon they will see that you don't need anyone you can do it on your on I don't know how old you are and if your young I no it's hard to feel that way about you most secure place ( in your home) . I do want to help you but if you could tell me a little bit more about your situation and I'll try to help you as much as I can I'm not a Doctor but I'll do my best to help you through this cause you are a beautiful human being and you deserve as much love and affection as your sister - if you have to sit down with your family and tell them how they make you feel about yourself when they treat you like this. You need to it just might help, be sincere about the way you feel, and show emothions like they really are so thst they realize what they are putting you through it's not fare especially when they brought you into this world and for you to feel like taking your life because they arn't take there time out for you as they do for your - it's just not right let them now that - I'm here for you girl I know how you feel and my parents are still like that I've moved away and hardly ever see them my sister lives rt. next to them and see's them everyday - but I'm okay I love not worring about it, when they are old and need me I'll stilll be there but I'm not going where I'm not wanted or don't feel comfortable- girl I LOVE YA and I'm here for ya - your friend my email address is babybluz430@yahoo.com if you need anything -
2006-08-19 07:32:13 · answer #3 · answered by Kittin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now that is no reason to commit suicide. I know how it is to have family problems, I to am sometimes taunted by thoughts of just ending it all, but guess what? I'm not going to give them the satisfaction that they've won. I am better and stronger than that and so are u. You are who you are and if you're different it's because you've decided to be unique and nothing is wrong with being unique. Hey you're just one of a kind, a rare diamond.
Do like me, learn to love yourself, once you are comfortable with who you are you won't give a damn what others think, not even your family. Remember your life is what you make it, so make it worthwhile, live and make a difference in the world, don't be afraid to be bold, strong and brave. Think about that next time you're feeling down and out.
2006-08-18 15:19:21 · answer #4 · answered by Firebird 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This must be a "normal" phase of growing up. I remember feeling this way when I was young too. I always thought (hoped) I was adopted (though I looked like both parents). I just thought I needed more attention from them, but my brothers seemed to get most of the attention. I now realize that they got more attention because they required more than I did. They were always getting into trouble for something, but I was such a good girl that my parents didn't have to keep after me all the time. It wasn't because they loved my brothers more than they did me. Many times I've heard my own children arguing "Mom likes you better". At that moment, mom couldn't stand either one of them, but I loved both of them the same. Mom's spend their time nurturing where nurturing is needed most, I assume dads are the same way. They probably don't even realize that you're feeling neglected. Your best bet is to mention it to them. I'm sure you'll find that they love you just as much as the other kids. Suicide is a cowards way out. You don't have to face your problems, and you hurt the ones who love you.Is it that they don't understand you, or is it that you're not getting your way, so you're not talking?
2006-08-17 16:59:18 · answer #5 · answered by smommeee 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes when you have a different type of personality from your family, it is hard to feel as if you "fit in." I know how you feel.
Don't consider suicide honey. You have a lot of offer the world.
You won't always be at home with your family, so just try to hang in there. Make some good friends who appreciate you.
Can you talk to your sister about this?
Good luck, I hope things get better soon.
2006-08-17 03:52:23 · answer #6 · answered by Patti C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it makes you feel any better, im the first daughter. my life was so hard, i look at it that iwas my parents test child. my sis get everything she wants but better. just realize, they probally think that you are more mature and independant than she is.
Suicide I believe is just the easy way out. It shows that you are not willing to try anymore and saying such a thing whether your serious or not will actually cause more pain to your family members than you think.
Sweetie I think you should keep on truckin, finish school, go to college, get a job, be yourself, and hangout with friends. Eventually, the older you get, you realize you never needed all that attention you thought you wanted.
Keep your head up, there are people who wish they at least had a family at all.
2006-08-17 16:59:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sweetie , all my life my mom told me that I was the unwanted chile but that didnt stop me from living yet .. I want to commit suicide sometimes but I always think maybe one day down the road someone would love me too ..
Parents do this sometimes but you are not gonna live with them forever . You gonna find love of your life one day and live them so just tolerate them for the time being and always think about future because one day you gonna walk out of that home and would never go back again
2006-08-17 14:51:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem happens sometimes in families that forget about the youngest or middle child. They're focusing on the 1st born and don't look beyond that...
You need to sit your parents down...ALONE and tell them how you're feeling. If you don't communicate your feelings to them then how will you get them to know that you need ME time with your MOM OR DAD?
Maybe you could suggest to your MOM to do lunch or go shopping with you and only you. Same for your DAD. OPEN your parents eyes to see they have another child besides your sister!
2006-08-18 23:08:17 · answer #9 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i know how you feel. im the middle child. my older sister got more attention. and my little brother was the baby. so sometimes i felt like an outsider. but never thought of killing myself and you should never think like that ever again. life is a gift. live it and enjoy it. even if humans here on earth hurt your feelings, dont worry. tomorrow is another day and each day is different. maybe now you might not notice that each day is diffferent but just you wait.
you should have a talk with your parents. you need to tell them what hurts you. tell them you dont feel loved. dont tell them that you want to kill yourself cus then they will think you are weird. just have talks with them. if no one gives you attention, make yourself the center of attention. just dont over react.
spend more time with your sister and tell her also that you dont feel loved by the family. maybe she will have a talk with them and let them know how you feel.
i hope everything goes well. take care of yourself. god bless you.
2006-08-11 07:58:12 · answer #10 · answered by All4Christ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋