I cheated with him, took him an now he is back with her.?

Question

this stuff went on for awhile. He went back an forth between us. Made us hate each other. Well she messaged me today an said that when she broke up with him it opened his eyes up an now they had a chance at a new beginning, do you guys think he will treat her right or is this part of the game? When he first started talking to me he was cheating with a ex gf. An alot of the stuff he is telling her now he told me. So is he for real or is he just playing more of his games. She told me while he was with me he was still sleeping with her, an I know that while he was with her we were sleeping together. He has been going back an forth for about 2 months now. We all work together what should I do? Help me save face. She an I both look stupid. I e-mailed her an told her everything that I could think of that he did behind her back so he will be pissed an stay away from me. But I still feel foolish what should I do? Get even or leave it alone?

Answer 1

There is no "getting even" with this one. He is playing you and every other woman he is dealing with. I say that instead of taking the childish way out by emailing her and trying to get her to hate him, stand up for yourself and not let him do this to you.

I am a firm believer that if you get a man through cheating ways, he will leave you in cheating ways. Your health is way too important to just throw it around like that. What if her revenge on him was to catch a STD and then you catch it? That wouldnt be nice at all.

Just dont respond to text messages, calls, emails or anything. Wipe him out of your life. Whatever she chooses to deal with is her business, but you should be above it all.

Answer 2

Leave it alone and let her end up being totally screwed over. You're wasting your time, he's just a player! I agree that both of you girls are stupid. This man is continuously cheating on both of you, with no consequences for him! And if you all work together, all three of you probably appear pretty unprofessional right now. If you're the one that walks away, you will get more respect. Get a hotter boyfriend and show him off. Chances are, the guy who's using you both won't give a ****, and the girl will probably realize that she's stuck with a loser. And then he'll probably find someone else to cheat on her with, and the games can begin again. But hey--at least it won't be you that looks bad! Hope this helps!

Answer 3

The best way to get even is to not let him back into your life or your bed ever again. Find a man that is better than him in every way. You may want to start looking for another job too. the best way to stay out of it is to move on and make a better life for yourself. You and the wife should become friends. That would really get back at him. Because it's like as long as the two of you hate each other, he's going to continue this game. As long as the two of you keep letting him back in he's going to continue disrespecting you both.

Answer 4

If you have a relationship with someone that is an affair, do not expect that it will not happen to you. You are dealing with someone with the emotional intelligence of a 3 year old. The fact that you are asking this question states that you have been fooled before and are seemingly willing to be fooled again. Do the smart thing, stand up for yourself, tell him you don't want to see him again, and move on with your life. And be more careful about who you get involved with in the future. If you think you deserve better than that, then make sure that is what you recieve.

Answer 5

Do you want him to be with you or with her?

If you want him to stay with her and leave you alone, it's easy enough to push him away. If you want him to be with you, then lead your life as you have been before and he'll come knocking if he wants you.

Imo he's just playing a game, sort of like trying to dribble several basketballs at once. He feels underchallenged by just one girl, so he juggles them and when they hit each other and bounce away, he goes after the one that went further first and brings it back. For that short time he pays more attention to that ball, but when they are both secure, he'll go back to dribbling both.

The one thing you should not do is ever accept an apology from him, ever. He is not sorry. He just isn't. Whatever he did, he wanted to do it.

Answer 6

I think your best bet would be to just leave it all behind you. Try and avoid talking with him and her as best you can at work. You did the best you could to tell her what he was doing and now it's time to let her make her own decisions. If they decide to stay in a repeat cycle that is there life and you just have to remember to stay out of it. Maybe even try and find a new job - no one needs this much drama in their life!!! You'll probably be much happier and peaceful in an environment without some bizarre love triangle. Try and remember what it was like to find out he was cheating on you too and next time you find a guy you like make sure he is actually single before dating.

Answer 7

There's no honest way that you can save face. All you can do is be honest with yourself: what you did was disgusting. Why sleep with someone who is already taken? By your action, you've already lost face by lowering yourself by sleeping with someone who already sleeps with at least two other people.

If you are smart, you will accept your failure as experience and learn to find a person that is superior than this weak person who does not even have a face to save to begin with.

His only face is you worrying about these events that have occurred.

Forget about him and her. Focus on making yourself better in the future. If you make the same mistake, you will become emotionally diseased, like that man you slept with.

Save your face by not losing your face completely like that guy you slept with.

Answer 8

You are playing right into his hand by telling her anything. Just one brief warning like "That is what I used to think" is sufficient enough to warn her to be on the look out. Anything more comes across desperation and jealousy. It seems like a sad attempt to get him back in temporarily. This guy is never going to change. Why would he. He has two women that are willing to fight over him and take him back no matter what he does. He doesn't respect either of you because you are not respecting yourselves. You are worth a whole lot more than that.

Answer 9

You do look stupid (as does she) and you have no one to blame but yourself. You hooked up with an untrustworthy man. DUH. Did you think that you could change him and make him faithful to you? You can't control the weather, either. Both of you have rewarded his lack of integrity with your continued attention and consideration. Meet with her and discuss the both of you having nothing to do with him in the future. He has taught you both what kind of guy to avoid and given you experience and wisdom. Thank him for that, and forgive him for his shortcomings. Take the high road and move on. She should, too. You might gain a friend out of all of this....
Should she want to hang on to him, tell her "Ok, he's YOUR problem now, and I can do better". Then, feel sorry for her knowing she will always be wondering and worrying.....
In the future, avoid work relationships. It's always a bad idea.

Answer 10

Sounds like a tough situation, I wouldnt bother with any of them and move on.

No matter what you say to her about what he did wrong, he will tell her that you are just jelious. The other girl hates you for stealing her man (even if you didnt) she feels that you did, and she will take him back no matter what.....

It wont work between them, trust me. Just move on...do you really want a b/f who cheats? I'm a guy and I have guy friends that cheat, and one of my friends in college had 5 girl friends, and cheated on ALL of them....he told them he loved them and such, and was so nice to them....Move on....