i have lived with this man for 5 years and i just cant stand him no more. when we started i was madly in love with him but he has a herion addicttion that has destroyed everything that i felt for him i have teied to help him but he will stop for a couple of weeks but hell come right back to the same thing. he tells me that he would stop and then hell be right back to the same **** . but then hes always been there when i have needed him i have thrown him out of my home 4 times but then i feel bad cause when i have needed him he has been there but i just dont know what to do cause i think he would chance if i gave him another chance please help
2006-08-11 06:24:47 · 13 answers · asked by oh my 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Throw him out again. Change the locks. Call a lawyer about a restraining order to keep him away. Then shop for another home somewhere else to get you some safe distance. Winning the lottery has better odds. Some bright guy once said his definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over while expecting different results--so, are you crazy?
2006-08-11 06:32:56 · answer #1 · answered by Rabbit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A heroin addiction? Sorry to say, that will not go away easily. I suggest that you leave him now before you totally resent him. He needs to go to theropy on his own. Only he can fix himself. You can't change him. You have given him enough chances to know that. I'm sure he believes himself when he says that he'll stop, but he can't quit something like that cold turkey. It's a long process. Promise him that you will be happy to give things another go AFTER he gets better and not until. Then stick to your words. Yes it WILL hurt you for a while, but once you move ahead in your life, the hurting will ease up and you can get on with YOUR life. Life is too short to worry and stress about other people who don't want to help themselves. Good luck!
2006-08-11 13:36:17 · answer #2 · answered by Babs 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
May I suggest you think about your situation. You say you can't stand living with him in one breath and say he's always been there for you in the next. That doesn't compute from where I sit.
You are getting something out of the relationship or you would have ended it. What is it that you get? Looks from here as though you are as addicted as he is and you need to get your head on straight. In other words, take care of you. Take a look at this site: http://rational.org/index.html Scroll down to where it talks about the voice of The Beast and see if that's the voice that tells you to stay with him.
2006-08-11 13:37:26 · answer #3 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can't stand him anymore, and he has a major issue like that to deal with, sounds like you'd be better off without him. You said you have kicked him out before, which makes me think the home you live in is yours, so you don't have to worry about someplace to go.
Get rid of him once and for all, break all contact with him, and imagine how HAPPY you'd be with someone nicer who you CAN stand that has no addiction like that. That's a VERY dangerous and deadly addiction, I'd avoid him at all costs...
Good luck and best wishes to you!
2006-08-11 13:31:51 · answer #4 · answered by Information Scavenger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't help him, I'm a RN and i use to work rehab/substance abuse...He can only help himself.
but do not be fooled they are great manipulators, I know I have a brother that is the same way.
Just leave and don't try and explain why trust me he already knows....relationships are about helping each other you have and so has he. Now it is time to go...
2006-08-11 13:43:23 · answer #5 · answered by jazzygirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's never going to change. Five years is a long time!!! You're just his enabler.. everytime something goes wrong he's back on the smack again.... give up he's just a junkie.
2006-08-11 13:31:20 · answer #6 · answered by Sorcha 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can only give someone so many chances. Your best bet is give him a choice. Check into a drug rehab or get out.
2006-08-11 13:57:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i say let him read this then tell him that you don`t want to see him unless he gets off the s**t ron is bad stuff seen it destroy many close friends he wont change untill he wants too even then it`s hard i had one friend die in my arms i never want something like that to happen agine
been their done that never agine
2006-08-11 13:36:39 · answer #8 · answered by steamroller98439 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can't change a man hun, he's going to do what he wants to do with or without you. it's time for you to go on with your own life and find a different man that isn't hooked on anything.
2006-08-11 14:18:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
either you get out or get him out,when you think he make you sick,then better sooner on place of waiting.
2006-08-11 13:33:42 · answer #10 · answered by lucky s 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋