Everytime I ask my 2-year-old son to pick up this toys (or when he doesn't get what he wants), he'll say "no want" and lays down on the floor. When you go to pick him up, he just lets his body go limp. It drives me absolutely crazy! How can I get him to stop doing this?
2006-08-11 06:15:53 · 27 answers · asked by Chewie 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
If he is doing this because he didn't get what he wants just completely ignore him and walk around him as if he isn't even there. He is trying to get attention and being ignored is absolute torture for a child that age. A comment to the effect of "If you act like this you won't get what you want later either" can help. If you are in a store, you scoop him up, put everything that was his back on the shelf (so he can see you do it) and leave.
If he is doing this because he won't pick up his toys, tell him that if he doesn't put his toys away then you will put them away and he can't have them. If he doesn't move (which he probably won't the first time) carry out the threat. Put them away where he can't get them for a while. If he freaks out, the time doesn't start until he calms down. Explain that you told him that this would happen and start ignoring him.
The trick is to be absolutely calm and unemotional. Kids try to mess with your emotions so you need to wall up. Act as if you just don't care that he is upset because he doesn't have a valid reason for being upset.
The idea is the get him to associate "I do bad things" with "bad things happen to me". Later, if you are in a situation where he would normally freak out and he doesn't, reward him for being good. Whenever I take mine to the grocery store, they are allowed to get one thing each (and one thing only) and they only get it if they are good. If at anypoint they misbehave, I simply point out that they won't get their one thing.
Always let him know what you are rewarding or punishing for because he might not make the connection himself. I am not lying, it will be tough and it is a lot of work but in the longrun life will be easier.
2006-08-11 06:32:19 · answer #1 · answered by mrodrx 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You say "Okay, I'll give you 5 minutes (how long can depend on how many toys are on the floor) to pick up your toys. What ever toys are on the ground I'm going to put away for a week." Then walk out of the room and do something else for 5 minutes. Then get a laundry basket and carry it into the room. Pick up all the toys on the ground, place them in the basket, then put them somewhere he can't get it or see it. This should work, he might not do it the first time, but stay true to your words and take them away. If the toy thing doesn't work then say "Every minute that you don't do _____________ is a day away from the Tv or favorite toys or whatever." It's harsh but it will work.
2006-08-12 13:59:34 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore this behavior but go back later and make sure he does what you ask. Sometimes you have to take the limp body through the whole process moving the hands to pick up the toys, carrying him to the toy box, etc. :). Eventually, he'll see that it's just easier to do it the first time since you don't give up. It's a difficult age, the Terrible Twos. Sometimes it seems like we'll never get them civilized doesn't it? Patience and perseverance at this age will pay off in the long run. Hang in there:)
2006-08-11 06:24:59 · answer #3 · answered by R. F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know why, but everytime me and my 2 year old daughter go to Target she doesn't want to look around. She would rather run up and down the aisle then lay on the floor ignoring me as I call her to come to me. Everytime!
So, what I have started is saying, "Bye Isabel! Cya!" She lays there for a moment. She scoots around the floor a little bit and trys my patience, but then she gets up and walks with me.
I feel that at that point, it's time to make a change in your actions. Your baby is frustrated and wants a solution that you just don't get. Sometimes my girl just wants me to stand next to her and listen to what she has to say.
2006-08-11 10:23:30 · answer #4 · answered by Her Mama 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's 2, it's a phase, it'll go away and be replaced by something even more annoying. My 2 yr old does the same thing. She'll lay down on the floor, but if you try to pick her up she screams. At least your son only goes limp. The handbook never said motherhood was going to be all fun and games... lol
2006-08-11 06:23:43 · answer #5 · answered by jeffypuff 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore him. He's just looking for attention. Just tell him you are going in to the other room and when you get back those toys better be picked up. If you come back and they are still all over the floor, then take them away for the rest of the week. Kids need to learn that if they want to play with their toys they need to take care of them.
2006-08-11 06:19:02 · answer #6 · answered by BeeFree 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try this. buy a placemat or small chair or just place a towel on the floor and call it the "naughty spot". when he doesn't listen to you, kneel down on his level and look him right in the eyes. say "mommy told you to do so and so" or whatever and tell him this is warning and if he does it again he'll sit on the naughty spot for 4 minutes (or if he's a really big rascal you may want to try it for less time) if he does it again get down on his level again and tell him you have already given a warning and now he has to sit on the naughty spot. sit him down and tell him why he is there and how long he has to stay. when he repeatedly cries and runs away from it just pick him up and put him back but do not say a word (it is very important to not give him any additional attention after you tell him to sit on the naughty spot). finally, if you are persistent, he will listen and give up and stay there. if you have the patience to implement the naughty spot it will work. just get through the first rough time and it will work.
2006-08-11 07:10:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop reacting to his tantrums. He gets a rise out of you when you get frustrated with his dead-weight behavior. Ignore him when he does this.... walk away. You state your expectations clearly, "I want you to pick these toys up and put them into the box." When he flops down, you turn, with no expression on your face, and walk out of viewing distance. He'll have no audience to play to. When he realizes this, he'll come looking for you to act it out again. Follow through with the same response. "I asked you to put your toys in the box." If he flops again, move again. You are trying to establish that flopping down is not a response you will accept. You asked him to complete a task, and don't give up until he does. When you go back and forth with him in a power struggle, no one wins and you both are frustrated. This is not a magic pill, however, and it will take lots of your patience on your part to make it a routine. Once he gets the idea that you are not budging in your response, he will start modifying his responses to meet your expectations. Don't pick him up, you'll just end up straining your back and continuing with the fight. Walk away and end the confrontation.
2006-08-11 11:26:58 · answer #8 · answered by dolphin mama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are out in public and you don't mind a few glances stomp your feet and throw your own little "fit". Kids don't like to be made fun of! If you are at home you could try to make a game out of picking up the toys. Sing a song about picking up the toys and give your little one a reward of sorts if he picks up! You could try to lie down and throw a fit with him if you're at home too.
2006-08-11 06:21:22 · answer #9 · answered by Kerry S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
walk out of the room. if there is nobody there to put on a show for, he will stop it. ignoring it will make him worse because your still in the room.he doesnt want to pick up his toys,i dont want to do laundry today but i do it without a tantrum,he is only two thats his way of expressing.My son does it too and walking out of the room works for me
2006-08-11 07:20:33 · answer #10 · answered by macshickey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋