OK, I've given her no reason to think I'm not OK but this morning?

Question

I wake up to two missed calls asking me to please let her know I am okay. Supposedly some of our mutual friends have been talking to her saying I'm not doing so good. I'm not. But I'ts not like I'm going to kill myself. I love this girl and want to marry her and she knows that. She has said it doesn't look good. Ok that sucks for me but with time I'm sure I'll be fine. FYI she wanted to marry me too and I just took about two weeks longer to say it than she was willing to give me. We were together two years and she moved back to her hometown. Last week she finally told me it was over and I sent her my goodbye email and never intended to talk to her again. Then this morning happened. Our mutual friends couldn't have said anything that serious because all they know is I'm sad and I'm trying to get through this. Why would she contact me?? She has supposedly moved on (in one month I might add) and told me to do the same. Sorry if I can't do it in a couple of weeks. I love her

Answer 1

I agree with DAC. However, if it's really over let her know you are ok, and that you aren't going to do anything stupid, but also let her know that her contacting you is not helping you heal faster. Maybe after you talk to her for a few minutes you can say something like "I appreciate you calling and checking on me but that's not making things easier on me, if you know what I mean". Hopefully she will understand and you both can move on with your life. Unless she is really contacting you to see if there is still anything there. Perhaps she didn't think you really loved her and now hearing this is making her realize that you did. You can never tell with people.

Answer 2

She might be concerned about you, even if you did break up. Or she might wish that you hadn't broken up. If I were you, I would think long and hard about how much you want to marry this woman. If you said that you wanted to marry her because you really meant it and not because she was making you feel pressured, then perhaps you should try to get back with her by making a serious move toward marriage.

On the other hand, your hesitation to ask her to marry you may indicate that deep down you know this won't work. And if you are thinking about getting back with her, it may be because you are not over her and miss those two years of companionship.

If you would like to get back with her, I think the best thing to do is to contact her and suggest that you have a few sessions of pre-marital counseling with a professional therapist. I know this might sound wacky, but it can really help you work through these issues and not make a life-changing mistake. Offering to do this will also show her that you are serious about getting married and doing things right.

But if the thought of doing this seems like too much to you, then I would guess that perhaps, deep down, you really don't want to get married.

Sorry there are no easy answers. Best of luck.

Answer 3

It is hard when you really love someone and you try to pick up the pieces and try to get back to being who you are but over time you will trust me i know it is easy to say and hard to do but it will get easier.You are on the right road sending her a goodbye e mail that helps you out when you do that and she moved on does not mean you have to take your time stay busy spend time with your friends or family even try something new a new hobby maybe. 2 years is a long time so it will take time to mend your broken heart and I think some times it is harder when someone leaves and moves away and tell you week later rather than telling you up front but there i someone else out there for you when your ready you seem like a really great guy because you intend to ask her to marry you most guys will not do that.hope this helps you out it hurts I know but you will be just fine over some time.Take Care God Bless and try talking with someone you are really close to that it will you .

Answer 4

Something similar happended to me. I was with this guy for three months, but I have known him forever. I was the happiest woman on the earth with him and having him in my life made me complete. One day he said he just needed some time and he broke up with me. Two months later I tell him that if he still needs more time and he says yes. I kept waiting for him and one day I find that he is going out with someone else. That completely broke my heart. I didn't eat, I didn't sleep and I even stopped going to college the last two weeks of the semester. I have an incomplete in one of my classes because I didn't go to one of my last term exams. My advice to you is, if you trully think that it is over, do no, I repeat do not talk to her or anything. Talking to her will only give you hope of one day hooking up again with her. If you truly feel that you can do something to get her back, do it. Love is one of the most beautiful feelings in the world and it is worth fighting for .Sometime you win and sometimes you loose but at least you tried. Remember that not everyone is wise enough to see what they have. One day she will regret having done this to you. The best thing you can do now, like I am still doing, because I still love the man that broke my heart, is just hang out with your friends and distracting yourself with other thing. Do not talk to her or tell her how you are. She is not an idiot and obviously she knows that you are not okay. I mean, she broke your heart. If she didn't care about breaking your heart, don't let her know how you are. If she truly wants to know how you are, she is feeling guilty for what she did. Let her live with the guilt. You, like I will survive this.We will each find someone who will truly love us the way we deserve. Only time will heal our deep cuts.I know it still hurts because I still hurt. Having a broken heart is the worst feeling in the world. . With time it stops hurting. You will get through this, I promise.

Answer 5

she's lonely and questioning her actions, feels bad for hurting you. I've seen this a million times.
She wants to know you're okay to help her own fears at bay, which isn't necessarily a bad thing.
I've gone through this not too long ago it's def. a hard time, but you'll heal we did :)

Answer 6

who knows y she called u. she probably is worried b/c she still cares 4 u. but tell her ur cool and leave it at that.

Answer 7

the pain will lessen my man and if you need help [e-mail]