is it normal for and child too act like this?

Question

my best friends lil boy sents he was able to sit up he rocks. he is 4 now and he get mad he sits down and rock back and forth pulling his hair. and sometime he just sit and hard rocks he even dose it in the car going some were. he dosen't get along with other kid he was way hurts them. he slam's my lil girl in the floor i ahve hard wood floors, he has scrached her leaving and big scar on her leg. he said she done something to him like hit him and she in the other room not around him. the other day the were watching tv my lil girl was sitting in the floor he was on the couch he got up and bit her to the point of drowing blood. my friend said it just the way and lil boy acts. is this true or dose he have and problem. she tell him not to this any more that my lil girl is and baby and he can hart her.

i stop her from playing with him as much and i watch ever move he make ween there around one another. i stoped watch him for my friend to work i told her i was looking for and job and i didn't have the time. but i feel sorry for him if you ask her if something wrong with him she get pissed off. i think he needs help he go's to preK this year. well the school make her have him tested?

i dont think it cause of attion he not getting ween his mom or grandma try to hug on him he push them alway. he has bit his grandma for trying to kiss him and his bit his mom too. and his mom told me ween they went out of town to see her aunt he bit her too. this child is 4 years old and i just think there something going on. that his kid need some tape of help. they came back to day about 30 mins ago she just called me.

Answer 1

This type of behaviour indicates that there is some serious issue(s) that need professional assessment - immediately!! Rocking back and forth can possibly mean that there is a psycological problem, as this is a sort of self-comforting thing usually. The fact that he is very agressive is another indication that something is not as it should be. Please try to get your friend to take her little boy in to see a doctor/child psychologist and get him assessed. It sounds like your friend does not want to face the fact that there could be a serious problem that needs a child psychologist's intervention. The earlier this issue is addressed, the better the chances are that he will overcome whatever the problem is. Your friend also needs to know how to handle him and help him. Regardless of what the Dr. says, this agressive behaviour is not acceptible, and she needs to be very firm with her little boy and make him realize that she won't tolerate his biting and hitting. She should take a leaf out of the "Super Nanny" series and give him a time out every time he does this, so that he learns to control his aggression. In the meantime, my suggestion is that you ask her to control his behaviour around your little girl, and that if she is unwilling to do that, then you will have to take your little one and leave. If that doesn't work, then perhaps you should reconsider if you should let them play together at all. You have to take care of your child's safety first. She should not be subjected to this.
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Answer 2

I think he has some type or disorder. But i know it will probably be pretty hard to tell this to your friend. Parents don't like to hear that something is wrong with their kids. My little brother and I have tourette syndrome and my parents still don't like to hear it. My mom completely denies the fact that my brother has it. And the only reason she admits that i have it is because i knew something was wrong and made her take me to the doctor.

Maybe he had OCD. That is the first thing that came to my mind when i read that he hurt your daughter while he was sitting on the couch and she was sitting on the floor. Because she may have been sitting in one spot and he got used to her sitting there then she got up and sat down maybe a couple feet from where she was before. This would have irritated him if he had OCD. That would lead to him getting mad, and a 4 year old would know nothing better than to blame her.

Rocking back and forth may be a cause of him trying to hold in his frustration because he knows that he gets in trouble when he gets mad and bits or yells or whatever.

I don't really know alot about these disorders, i have done some research when i was trying to figure out what i have. But maybe you should do some research. I am still not quite sure how you can get your friend to listen to you. But this is something important and no matter how much she doesn't want to hear it, it is her son's health that you are talking about and it is very important

Answer 3

I have two lil boys and they are different. But, to answer yes the rocking is normal. The pulling of the hair isn't. He has his own way of dealing with things. Now, The reason for doing these things is, he doesn't quite know how to voice his objections to whats going on around him. He may be classified ADHD or ADD like my five year old. He did the same thing. But until your friend helps him express himself in a more positive way things may get worse. I'd keep a close eye on your lil girl when he is around, jealousy hurts!!!!

Answer 4

This is not normal. He sounds like he could have several disorders, Autism,Aspergers, ADHD and possible bi-polar. This child needs to be diagnosis soon. The mother is in denial. The sooner she knows what is wrong the sooner he can get help. I am a nurse and a foster mom for children with therapeutic disorders and the sooner he can be helped the better for everyone involved. She will need lots of support, but watch him around your daughter.

Answer 5

These are not normal responses. Sensory stimulation like rocking and hair-pulling should be evaluated by a professional. Especially with the agression levels he is showing towards your daughter. As much as the other mom wants to avoid it, she should have him evaluated by the local school district. Once he starts kindergarten, they can't make him be evaluated, but I bet his teacher will request that he be. They can't test children for any problems without the parent's consent. The other mom is probably in denial (who wants to believe that there is something wrong with their child), but she is not helping by not getting an evaluation. I'm glad you took your daughter out of the situation for now- she'll just become a target. Let your friend know that you are concerned... not just for your daughter, but for her son- and that you feel it is important for him to be tested by the school district.

Answer 6

Rocking can be a form of self stimulation and aggression towards others without cause, which can be seen in mentally retarded individuals. How old is the little boy? If he is old enough to know better and doesn't....then keep your daughter in your sight whenever he is around for her own safety. Your friend will have to deal with her son and his possible disabilities when he gets in school. This will be very difficult for her and she will need good friends.

Answer 7

It is very hard to tell of course, but I think it would be wise for your friend to have a check up on her little boy. The hard part is how to suggest that to her without hurting her feelings. Perhaps you could lend her a magazine article or book on 'problem' children - or get the child's school/nursery/playgroup teacher/grandma to speak to her. In the meantime, I would not leave the little girl alone with him - just in case.

Answer 8

Your friend's son sounds rather anti-social. As other users above mentioned, someone should have him tested for Autism. Keep your daughter away from him and if they have to be together, NEVER leave them unsupervised. He's a danger to your daughter and things can get worse. Your friend also needs a reality check. It seems to me that she is blissfully ignorant and is incapable of supervising the children.

Answer 9

My little guy is Autistic...and it sounds like so is your friends little guy.
It would be in the best interest of her child to get him an appointment with a specialist (pediatrician can diagnose it)....it takes a lot of care and love to get through the first hurdles. Keep your little girl at a distance and never leave them unsupervised. Worsed case scenerio, call the local health unit or children's aid and ask what can be done to get the little guy help. It is not fair to punish him for something he can't help.

Answer 10

The truth is I'm not a doctor and I can't give you medical advice but for the safety of your own child, I would not allow the children to play together. It sounds like autism or something. Your daughter deserves your protection.