Need advice on whether I was right or wrong.?

Question

My son has been living with the "woman" who is twice his size in weight.Recently found out she slaps him around when shes drunk.I try to stay out of their problems.On a visit to their house,my son couldnt fix her car himself but he got his fixed,he has an old camaro and hers is an import.After I gave her $300 to get her car fixed,she made the statement to my son that he will never be the mechanic that a friend of theirs is.My son was raised with myself and daughter,No men to teach him to work on cars but I taught them the basic maintence.So when I found out she said that I told my son shes a F*****ng B***h.I wasnt happy with myself, but my son is paying all the bills and her money goes to partying with her friends without my son and to her car.She hasnt talked to me since.Should I have kept my mouth shut?Thanks from a trying not to interfere MOM.

Answer 1

I fully understand your concern. If your son is over 18 then there isn't really much you can do. Assuming he is over 18 you can still voice your opinion, and in my opinion, you have not only a right to do so but you have an obligation to your son to do so. However, be sure that you tell your son exactly how you feel about the woman and be sure to always be completely truthful with him. You must not create a wedge between them because that may be worse then staying out of it completely. I guess you have to walk a fine line here. When you are around the woman or the both of them you must try your best to remain neutral. What you tell your son when you are alone with him is up to you. I agree with you, it sounds as if she is what you say. Good Luck to you both!!!!!

Answer 2

The most unreported crime in the world....female abuse. The courts look the other way (even charge the guy for getting beat-up). I hope he wasn't brought up with an inferiority complex to females. It's hard to find any positive role models for white males in this society so without a fair homelife it's hard to stand-up for himself. Enough ot that, what you did was right. In fact, you should take it farther and help him get out of that relationship. It won't be easy because of the police funding that only comes when the male is the perpetrator but try to get it documented. It will also be hard because society will tell him to take it like a man...he will need your support. He needs self-respect and dignity and he's never going to get that in that relationship. GET HIM OUT!!!

Answer 3

you just called it as you saw it. But appearantly your son is (still) in love with this woman, so that will put you on the side line, no matter how right you are. He'll have to figure out for himself if she's the right person for him. But he will also have to learn to stand up for himself, because it sounds like he doesn't do that too often.

Answer 4

you're slightly the two (superb suited and incorrect): enable me to describe. You had an expectation of your companion to respond on your crises an identical way you spoke back to his; that is large, regardless of if it rather is in basic terms a reasonable expectation in case you totally communicated this certainty to him. anticipating reciprocity is okay, yet anticipating same reciprocity is slightly unreasonable by using fact human beings react to various stimuli in yet in a distinctive way. the certainty that he made an attempt in any respect ought to have been noteworthy. (So, in case you land up arguing approximately this, probability is nice he will make even much less of an attempt in destiny crises, by using fact in his ideas, no good deed is going unpunished and "you're in no way happy".) on the different hand, you do not desire to cheer for the main minuscule token gestures after having given a lion's share your self. that's why I pronounced conversing is fundamental: as quickly as you have set a sparkling parameter for what's and is not suited on your relationship, that's incumbent upon him to the two comply with it, argue the factor, or pass directly to greener pastures.

Answer 5

You need to stay out of their relatioship. You can speak to him about your worries but if he chooses to stay with her there is nothing you can do about it. Don't run the risk of alienating your son by asking him to choose. She does sound like a Witch with a B. Don't give them anymore money and she will come around especially if she knows she needs you. Be respectful to her but you don't have to pretend you like her.

Answer 6

Don't worry, I'm sure your son agrees with what you said.

Answer 7

yOu actually did the right thong cO'z the girl was really really bad yOu knOw... but i think yOu shouldn't say f****** b***h...cO'z,,, i dOn't i think its wrOng... yOu should had said it a polite way..

Answer 8

I agree w/ mia.......