my mother in law wants me to do household work which i dont like to rather sometimes not able since i m 2 months pregnant.i want to utilize my time in other valuable works but she doesnt tries to understand.what should i do?
2006-08-10 21:40:50 · 22 answers · asked by rohit k 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
ok lets suppose you are in your mother's house and she askd you to work will you come here and complain on your mother.
well there is not wrong in doing household chores if you cant do all the thing then hire a helper.
I read many ppl telling you to move out that is not an option
cos wont you have to do your own work if you moved out
and who will look after you in your pregency
you may go to your mothers place but how long can you stay in your mother's place just askd this question moving forward 25 years from now
when you will be a mother in law and your DIL will act the same way how will you feel
why dont we learn any thing bout adjusting with our parents in law?
We do adjust with our parents respect them and listen to everything they say and follow them as if they are ....
any ways why doesnt it apply when it comes to your Parents in law.
dont pay heed to those who told you to move out especially the suggestion from the ppl staying outside India ( no hard feeling guys) cos we are Indians and we believe in unity.
think bout his and take your decision
and also you are feeling tired to work at an young age. though you are 2 months pregnant its good for your and your chlds health.
try to understand her
godd luck for your life and congratulations on your pregnancy
take care
2006-08-12 15:32:00 · answer #1 · answered by tannyblr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have nice talk with your husband and try expressing your thoughts to him about you doing something else apart from household work. But one decent suggestion is though you would like to do some other work there is nothing wrong with doing household work too. Since you may be able to do all of the work due to your pregnancy you can contribute a little and make your mother in law also happy which in turn will help you in your future. Giving love and affection to your inlawsis also a valuable work though not material.
However, if you continue to feel that you need to go out and then do some valuable work then you can try speaking with your mother in law with the help opf your husband and convince her to allow you to perform some part time job.
Keeping in mind your pregnancy status, it is better not to get too stressed and not to take new commitments like a job which may be taxing in the later stages of your pregnancy. This could be one reason why your mother in law may not want you to work.
Give it a nice thought first and then speak to your hubby and your mother in law as relationships are too delicate and a small misunderstanding may turn your whole life.
All the best and yes congrats on your pregnancy.
2006-08-11 04:50:13 · answer #2 · answered by its_anoo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How much house work is she trying to get you to do. It is not unreasonable for you to do some house work at 2 months pregnant, but if you can't you can't. Is she really pestering you, are you being lazy, or maybe she does not like you? You need to examine all the variables and decide truthfully what the issue is here. If the mother in law just does not like you, then you should talk to the husband and all get together and work it out. It is very possible that the problem will just go away but it is best to try and fix it, because it could just as easily get worse. If its simpler than that and she really just does not understand that for whatever reason you can not do it then explain the situation to the husband. Now if you honestly examined the situation and decided that the problem is more your fault, then you need to figure out how fix it.
2006-08-11 04:56:08 · answer #3 · answered by devrendo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Treat your mother-in-law as your own mother and respect her behaviour. During pregnancy, one must work so that the delivery is normal. If you are being pressurised unnecessarily, you can talk to your mother-in-law in a polite manner and short out the situation because unwanted tension will effect your child. Please do not put your husband in between otherwise she will think that you are complaining against her. Please don't use your husband's e-mail ID and create your own e-mail ID for personal safety reasons. Be cheerful and willing to obey your mother-in-law. This is a very small issue and I am sure you will be able to handle peacefully. Take care and be in good health.
2006-08-14 03:18:52 · answer #4 · answered by Kunwar Singh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems you haven't bothered to get an identity for yourself either in the household or on the Internet, so it is time you got one. Unless we do that we are liable to pushed around, which you cannot afford to as you are not alone anymore.
So for the sake of your child get up on your feet and start asserting yourself in the household, you are the lady of the household, so stop expecting your husband to fight your fights, you need stand up for your self and your child, rather than waiting for him to show up. Considering you are a smart and educated woman and can do it equally well.
2006-08-11 23:13:51 · answer #5 · answered by Abhishek Joshi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This the problem with any daughter in law in India. ( In other countries, the couple will move out and live separately I think or the daughter in law, who will be earning, does not care her mother in law)
Just talk nicely with your mother in law and remind her she is also a woman and knows the problems of a daughter in law. Make her to see the reason and tell her if she loves her daughter in law, she will also love her.
If she is adamant, tell your husband to quit the place and live separately. Then your mother in law would experience the difficulties of living alone.
If time permits, you can help her in daily house hold matters.
If you are employed, then it is still good. If your husband does not co operate with you, as some one has suggested you can go to your parents or live independently.
2006-08-11 11:44:51 · answer #6 · answered by Electric 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What does your husband say? It's not fair to make her do all of the housework if you're living in her house. And being two months pregnant won't stop you from doing any household chores that I know of, you're not even showing yet.
2006-08-11 04:46:56 · answer #7 · answered by Kanga_tush2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go and live in a tiny room or flat and leave you inlaws. Believe me that there is nothing you can do to satisfy your mother in law. It's human nature. Someday you'll be a mother in law. Good Luck.
2006-08-11 04:48:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let your husband know that when you married him you knew that you had to do household work. Now that you are pregnant you are not able to and that you need to make arrangements for someone to do what you do not feel comfortable doing. Let your husband talk to your mother about it if she refuses to understand you. What is she doing living with you. Or did you marry all his nuclear family? Let her go take care of her own house. Incase the house is her's please move to your own place and enjoy your marriage.
2006-08-11 05:22:21 · answer #9 · answered by Ycul72 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
UR mother-in-law is rite, u should do household work, this ll help u at the time of delivery.. ie natural delivery.. but i u should not strain much.
2006-08-11 04:54:21 · answer #10 · answered by krazy_about_girls 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋