Help with Parents...?

Question

I am fifteen. I decided to sing a song in Chruch sometime ago. I perfected it as best I could over three weeks. Many arguments were spawned over criticism of my performance. They insist that you can't believe what you hear or read but use hearsay to justify what they tell.They are Christians but use the excuse "reading scripture doesn't get you to heaven" for not reading the Bible. They discuss how bad other parents are and say that they know better than that. If I say anything slightly loudly they insist that I am yelling. If I don't jump as soon as a command had been given I am scolded and told that I am being disrespectful. I can't speak my mind if it contradicts what is said, especially if its during a heated debate. My father insists that we are a team yet is almost hypocratic on what her says. They insist that sheltering all my life helped me grow. Such as I didn't have decent knowledge about sexual prcoess until late sixth grade and that was through friends not parents. Advice.

Answer 1

yeah, I went through something similar. Not quite as dramatic though. I was criticized from many things and I was made to believe that what I did was either stupid or just not good enough.
Yeah, I learned a lot of what I know by watching others and I feel blessed and fortunate that those people had crossed my path.

I was always accused of being a bad and disrespectful girl.

there are good things that come from it. I am definately independent. I am a much wiser person. I am a very compassionate person.

Good things can come from anything, we just have to look for it
I had to turn to others for help and for counseling
The bad thing is, I did not too much about asking for help.
When I did, social services almost took me away and I asked that they did not, I regretted it because the remainder of my childhood sucked.

You are a better person that what your parents believe. You don't have to prove ANYTHING to them or to anyone else. If you are confident in what it is you are doing, then it is a very good thing.
Know this, people cross our paths for a reason. if you treat others right and help others, that help is going to come to you too.

Hang in there, I know it's tough. Are there relatives that you can try living with for a while or something? I had to do that.
I think that after I did that, my parents gained a better appreciation for me.

Answer 2

I feel your pain. I am about to turn 18 in a few days and am highly considering moving out when that day comes because I grew up in a home very similar to yours. My parents were extremely controlling as well as hypocritical, and things only got worse once I entered a relationship (which caused major problems after three months... now it's been three and a half years.) I have done the screaming at parents thing, and as much as I know you want to, and I know how hard it is, just do your best to let it roll off of you. What I found is that often the best thing to do is to just "yes" them to death. Make them believe you agree and then just ignore it. I wish I could give you more specific advice because I know how extremely frustrating this must be for you. The criticism and oppression of my family at one point had me in a deep depression that I'm lucky to have come out of alive. Friends, parents of friends, and teachers will be your best friends during this time in your life. Unfortunately verbal abuse (which is what you are experiencing) is very hard to prove to child services (and if your parents are like mine, they are excellent at faking being perfect angels in public), so most likely you are going to have to stay put for a while. Find a few people you can trust and take refuge in them. Good luck.

Answer 3

You are obviously in a church with a tremendous amount of Satanic influence. These people call themselves Christians but are really worshiping the devil. He can appear as an angel of light, but God gives us the knowledge to realize when we are being deceived if we listen. It is easier to go with the devil than God. Many churches are following Satan and going along with it because every one else in that church is. And I'm sure they present a sanctimonious attitude.
I am not a Jehovah's Witness, but am a pentecostal.
I suggest your parents quit sitting on their heads and get with a real Christian church.

Answer 4

Unfortunately, there's not much you can do. Keep in mind that no one's perfect, including your parents. The best thing to do is be patient, very very patient. When you're in an argument with them, keep cool, but don't get stiff with them. Just say this is how you feel about ______ and why you feel that way. You and your parents will start to understand each other better as you get older. I did with my parents.

Answer 5

first off parents are parents are parents. they all have their own way of dealing with how the house is run. i would say the grown up thing to do would be to talk to them about how u feel. dont just argue or yell, or anything. explain how u feel, in a calm rational manner, and perhaps they will allow u the freedom to express urself in a more adult way with them. once parents see u r being a responsible person, they usually ease up a little.

Answer 6

being 15 is hard, especially when your parents try to shelter you. sadly, you have at least 3 more years under their roof. do the best you can to tolerate them. then RUN! i know it's hard, but hang in there! you sound very intellgent and capable. good luck!

Answer 7

Chin up! You'll be 18 soon enough, then they will be old.