I just want to learn to relax and not let it bug me so much!! I feel like i cannot even go 2 weeks without getting mad or annoyed with him about something, so it is my goal that starting today that no matter what, I will not get mad at him for 2 weeks. Can anyone help me or give me any advise on how to do this sucessfully? like things to think about or even reasons why i keep getting so annoyed when i dont want to? thanks so much!!
2006-08-10 15:05:14 · 32 answers · asked by katie l 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Do you know for sure that he is joking or is there an element of truth to his "jokes"? Maybe you are being too sensitive, but maybe you are really insecure about the way he feels about you and it is showing. Try to laugh it off and tease back. See if he can take it as well as he dishes it out.
2006-08-10 15:17:34 · answer #1 · answered by mab5096 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Communication is key. It's not a bad idea to try to lighten up a little if you think you've been a little too serious on certain issues. That said, if he does something that bothers you, let him know. If you can't get past it with the lighten up method, then you have to tell him that what he is doing bothers you. If the two of you can't come to some sort of compromise (one that you are both happy with), then you have to evaluate whether you want to be with someone who casually insults you even after you let him know how much it bothers you. Keep in mind, you may do something that makes him feel the same way, so remember to be open to his feelings if/when the tables are turned. Good luck!
2006-08-10 15:15:12 · answer #2 · answered by Jessica H 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He doesn't respect you. Anyone that insults someone doesn't like them for one reason or another. I would never stay with someone that insulted me. If he didn't love me for 100%, for the exact person that I am, then I would leave him. Love should not hurt, even just a little, or even jokingly. Tell him how you feel and if he doesn't listen. Then move on to the next guy. There are nice guys still out there and they will NOT insult you. Good luck!
2006-08-10 15:22:40 · answer #3 · answered by dtammyus♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait a minute. He's hurting your feelings. If he's so insensitive as to not listen to you when you tell him it hurts your feelings, then he's willfully disrespectinig you. AKA being a jerk.
There's no reason in the world why you have to stay with him. If
he doesn't shape up- tell him to ship off! Find someone who values your feelings. I wouldn't want to spend time with a guy who constantly insulted me.
The reason why you are fighting with him so often is because he keeps on picking on you. He's the one who should just stop doing it. If he doesn't, leave him. You should have someone who
cherished you. Read "A Woman's Worth" by Marianne Williamson. It will remind you that you should be cherished.
Give him one last chance- tell him that you have no more tolerance toward his mean behaviour- if he crosses the line, Dump him on the spot. Walk away and don't look back.
2006-08-10 15:12:24 · answer #4 · answered by Linda S 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you trying to say here that you're going to let your boyfriend continue with the "joking" insults, without telling him how much it hurts your feelings!? WAKE UP!! A relationship is based on understanding, trust, and communication. You should be telling him how you are feeling and why his joking insults bother you. You are letting him walk all over you, because you are not telling him what he needs to hear from you: your feelings. No woman deserves to be disrespected. Speak up! And if he continues with his insults, no matter how much you have talked with him about it, he doesn't care about how you feel and he is worth nothing. Leave him if all else fails. Good luck!
2006-08-10 15:31:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My spouse does the same thing to me all the time, I even had to start going to therapy and take medication because of it... I have now decided I don't need this in my life so I have decided to get a divorce. I believe there is some truth to constant joking and if someone can't respect your wishes or constantly annoys you then they should find someone else that can tolerate it. Get out while you can....I'm SERIOUS!
2006-08-10 15:11:01 · answer #6 · answered by billyboysblue 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you're being disrespected. it extremely is a sort of emotional abuse. a individual would not could hit you to abuse you. could you tolerate this form of conduct, it is going to maximum efficient worsen. This individual has emotional problems and likes to exert his skill over you. You, on the different hand, could have self nicely worth subject concerns in case you have been tolerating it. i does no longer, no longer for one minute. Why do you think you adore him if he treats you so poorly? can not you get one greater boyfriend with a purpose to handle you effectively? do no longer you deserve respectable healing? each and every 3 hundred and sixty 5 days huge parts of girls such as you enable this to proceed to the factor that they are murdered with the help of their 'boyfriends'. don't be stupid. positioned a stop to this NOW.
2016-12-17 08:49:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys bond with each other through insults and competition. That's how they establish the pecking order.
Girls bond through sharing feelings and support. Girls form relationships through sharing.
Your guy is young, and needs to get a clue. Tell him that you are not one of the guys, and you would feel better if he traded the insults for compliments. "Attract flies with a little honey...."
Guys are trained not to show feelings or they will be considered "weak". They don't realize how much courage sharing feelings actually takes.....think about it, how hard is it to run and hide?
You have to get on the same page with each other. Learn what does it for each of you.
If he is not down with that, or will not listen, move on. You won't change him, so don't waste your time...you can probably do better, anyway.
Hang out with a guy that is so good to you, and makes you feel so special, that you find yourself bragging about him to your friends all the time.....not trying to figure out on "Answers"...
2006-08-10 15:26:31 · answer #8 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The only thing you can do, do to him what he does to you.
Last women I spent some time with started that with me. I warned her that if she didn't stop, I would show her what it feels like.
Of course she didn't stop.
So when the opportunity showed itself, I did a turnaround on her.
WOW. She sent me an email, that she had never been hurt like that before, even by her ex who she'd been married to for 29 years before she ditched him.
I just laughed and told her, since I don't want to hurt anybody, we better stop seeing each other. BIG SHOCK.
She wanted to back pedal, but I closed that door permanently. Life is TOO short for that kind of bull.
For someone like that, I'd rather be by myself. I am better company. ;-)
2006-08-10 15:15:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's ok to be mad sometimes. Maybe he crosses the line. Or maybe you're right. Maybe you just need to learn to chill. I don't think you should set such a black and white goal for yourself such as "I won't get mad at him for two weeks". It's ok to be mad when there's a good reason. Just try not to be so sensitive to the light hearted insults/jokes.
2006-08-10 15:09:29 · answer #10 · answered by Olivia B 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋