something happened 2 my cousiin that brought us together. and yah shes 3 years older then me. ok well at first when we started hanging out we had so much fun together and we told jokes and laughed and watched movies and just had fun. well about 2 months later well were still habging out and stuff but now when her friends call she talks to them for like an hour and ignores me. and when shes with my other cousin thats 2 years older then me they are always together and they always talk and leave me out of the conversation. and they whisper things in eachothers ear like its to secret for me to hear.and i get so sad sometimes i cant take beinfg ignored that i want to cry. and i realy love her shes my best friend!! but she treats me like im 7. she says oh sorry ur to young for this...and being excluded like that realy makes me sad. and i dont know what to do anymore because i cant take it....what do i do??
2006-08-10 10:08:33 · 17 answers · asked by [blahh] ™ 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
well you gotta tell your cousin how you feel that way. tell her how much it hurts you. and tell her you have suffer since she left you alone. well i say that if she still ignores you and left you doing nothing. you should cry it out! crying helps you feel better. discuss it to your family who you always believe in.
2006-08-10 10:27:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
even tho she's older..she doesn't sound very mature. if she was, she would be able to see that u felt left out, and would do something to help you feel special too. it's not like she can only be friends w/ one person, or the other person, and not u too! that makes no sense. so, first of all. stop thinking of her as ur best friend. she is ur cousin, and right now that's all she treating u as, and not a very good one at any rate. i'm sure u love and care for her, but can't force her to treat u nice! i suggest u learn to be confident in urself. do u feel happy? do u feel pretty? do u feel smart, fun, good person, great personality? if not, take some time out and work on urself. read some books, spend some time on ur own not depending on anyone. if the answer is Yes, you're Awesome! then just know that u can and will make more and more friends, and u won't need to depend on just one person. also, be there if she ever starts talking to u again, but if u are happy w/ urself and don't care that they ignore you (it's their fault for leaving u out, not urs), then u won't worry about what they do. u worry about ur life, urself, ur happiness, and be a good person. when she sees that she will come around..and if she doesn't see it, why do u waste ur time on someone who's going to treat u badly? that is not a very good friend... i have a feeling it has to do w/ maturity... let things go for awhile, and work on making urself feel good. :)
2006-08-10 10:18:22 · answer #2 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her how you feel. She's family and she should love you and care about you. It's more than friendship. Let her know that you don't appreciate being treated like a kid and tell her what you told us. If she's still purposely excluding you, you should probably back up and give her some space. In the meantime, find some friends to hang out with, friends that are just yours. Maybe you won't be so focused on your cousin and her little "habits" won't get to you as much. And who knows, maybe she'll see that you aren't as "young" as she thinks you are and she'll want to be included with things you and your friends do.
I think there's always that someone in the family that wants to feel "powerful" and she's kind of feeding off your need to cling to her and she likes it. It makes her feel special and wanted and it's not fair to you. It's similiar to that "popular girl" in school.
Just my opinion. Hope everything works out.
2006-08-10 10:29:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Anytime you let the behavior of other people upset you, it is your problem. The only thing you have control of is how you respond. You have control of nothing else.
You must accept the fact that people often relate better to people closer in age. They may have more in common because of shared classmates, events they have in common, a longer history together, or countless things.
In addition, if people see they can upset you. they will often go out of their way to do so. If for no other reason than to experience control. When you stop being upset, people will stop doing that.
Here is the good news. You are in a special category of people that actually is close to their cousins. Make them your allies in life. To make your relationships stronger, make sure you focus on what you can bring to the table. Focus upon mutual aid and support find ways to contribute, to be supportive of your cousins personal growth, make sure your family knows that you are unconditional in your acceptance of them. That you are not easily upset by what they do.
Make your role one of leadership and strength. Avoid acting dependent. Rather be interdependent.
2006-08-10 10:38:17 · answer #4 · answered by donsabe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to stop worrying about this for one. You are family, not just friends, right? So is your other cousin... But you are not the only people in your lives. You need to spend time with other friends and engage in activities and conversation other than with her. It's not healthy to be so "obsessed" for lack of a better word, with one friend. You burn out, she burns out, and you become enemies. expand your horizons for a while, she will come around... and then you can share new things to talk & joke about.
2006-08-10 10:17:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't have any cousins that are my age so I usaully have to hang out with cuzes that are older than me and this happens to me most of the time. You can make some other friends instead of just becoming upset because of her. Make new friends .
2006-08-10 10:25:59 · answer #6 · answered by CB. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you should talk to your cousin and let her know how you feel about all this, and if she tells you that she does not want to be your freind then it's time to let her go and give someone a chance........ and stop worrying about what you guys did in the past start thinking about now....that's the best way to deal with it because yesterday is gone.... tomm is not here yet so think about NOW.... i am sure she's not the ony person that you can be close too.... just look around you....you'll be surprised....
2006-08-10 10:19:21 · answer #7 · answered by VR 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should find something you and your friends all like and when shes around do the same thing and say shes to old for this and she'll feel the same way
2006-08-10 10:23:15 · answer #8 · answered by michael e 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make friends that are your own age.
It's good that you're friendly with your cousin, but you need to be hanging out with YOUR peers, not hers.
See how much fun she's having with friends her own age? You could be doing that, too, if you weren't dedicating so much of your emotional energy to your relationship with her. Let her go be herself, and you go be yourself, with friends your age.
2006-08-10 10:15:24 · answer #9 · answered by abfabmom1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound really young. I am sorry your cousin is hurting your feelings. You really shouldn't let is bother you.
You should also reconsider changing your user name. People will give you more respect, when you respect yourself and stop trying to act cool.
2006-08-10 10:20:56 · answer #10 · answered by Annie R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋