Why does it seem that so many parents have lost their parenting skills today?

Question

Why are parents so afraid to put their foots down with little Festus or Festina today? I see so many little kids out there spitting, smacking, screaming and acting like they are demon posessed wherever we go, it amazes me. Maybe I'm old school or something but even as kids if we thought to act a fool in public my parents would take us to the restroom and give us what we had coming to us. My dad used to say "If you want to embarrass me I can return the favor" and we knew if we didn't stop we'd get a whack on the behind in front of everyone. God forbid our actions made them leave the store or wherever we were, we knew we'd get it when we got home. I'm the same way myself today, I'm not afraid to correct my child if they are acting up no matter who is around. They're my kids and my responsibility. I'm responsible for them growing up and becoming decent citizens and not juvenile delinquents. Thoughts?

Answer 1

I agree 100%! Parents want to be friends not parents. My little girl knows how to behave in public. I dont spank, beat etc, but she still knows that there will be trouble if she misbehaves. I think people feel guilty about punishing their kids and they need to get over that quick.... thats why there are all those damn nanny shows on the tv!

Answer 2

Look, I'm a teenager and yea i do agree that our generation is pretty bad, but i don't blame the parents. My parents taught me and still teach me how to get through life respectively like there parent's taught them. The only problem is, in their time they didn't have anything else to tell them there was any other way to live. I know you don't want to believe it but technology has a lot to do with it. Think about it... there's shows about pregnant teenagers and spoiled brats that get whatever they want. Everyone has a tv, so you know everyone's watching it, and their being influenced by it. These people got FAMOUS because of the things you said were disrespectful. Not to mention our friends are around a lot more then our parents. With phones and computers, were actually communicating a lot more with our friends then our families. This world is easy to be influenced by because we all want to be something (and that's every generation) not everyone will agree with me but that's my opinion.

Answer 3

Good for you! Far too many parents worry about emotionally damaging their children. The fact is if a child is not taught to behave, they will not know how to behave. Babies are not born knowing how to act or react. The one that really gets me is the parent who thinks they will logically speak to a small child in an effort to have the child behave. Children learn at home how to act. If the child is not made to behave at home, why would they somehow magically behave in public?
You are right in your outlook on the responsibilities you have to your children as their parent, to help them become decent citizens. Keep it up. I know your children's teachers will greatly appreciate your parenting. Far too many parents want to consider what is fair to the child. The same child will then have a hard time when life does not treat them with the same fair treatment as mom and dad.
Parents have not lost their skills. The sad truth is that they never took the time to acquire the skills before becoming parents.

Answer 4

The idea of family has been redfined. today divorce is much more common, and financial success is far too important for many, therefore leaving the parenting to either an older sibling, or a teenage babysitter. Also, there are more families (the ones with 2 parents) with both parents out of the house and in the workforce. i am not saying that it is a bad thing--to each his own, however, because work may be a priority over the child (at times), the one who ultimately sufferes is the child---not the parent for having to work late.

Answer 5

There seems to be alot more of what I call "psycho bable" with kids now days. I mean that more and more parents instead of busting their kids rears, like would have been done 100 years ago, they want to "talk about why your so angry" to their 4 year olds. Do they really think that this works? You can not treat a child like an adult and analize why they are acting bad or why they said this or that. Also too many of those "anti-spanking parents" are poking their noses into other parents business and if you scold your kid in public, threaten to spank them, or actually do spank them, they criticize you or report you to CPS. If more kids were raised like kids were in the old days (1800's) then we wouldnt have all the little foul mouthed hoolagins running around.

Answer 6

You said it right. I'm the same way, except that because of today's society I will not spank in public, yes, the overeaction of others concern me. Yet it makes me wonder how they could judge someone for keeping their kids in line and theirs are lying on the floor screaming their lungs out. I like to keep the saying "Spare the rod, spoil the child" Children NEED discipline, they also NEED encouragement and praise for good behavior.

It is a delicate balance that maybe parents are afraid to try to conquer, in fear of screwing their kids up, and yet they don't realize they're giving their kids a view of the world that won't fit when they grow up. They're not going to always get their way, and in the work place, friendships, and marriage they are going to have to comprimise and deal with the consequences of doing something wrong, hurtful, or disrespectful.

Answer 7

I think too many people are selfish and think of themselves first from conceiving a child to raising them. They are lazy and rely on their own "natural" instincts thinking that's enough to raise a child, instead of taking parenting classes or at least reading magazines for advice. They're too lazy to get up off the couch and discipline a child when they need it. Discipline requires consistent repetition for results and too many parents are just too lazy to keep up with that. Easier to let little "Festus" run around than deal with it. Then when Festus is out of control they try meds or just act like there is nothing they can do even though they've "tried everything" when they've really just sat on their *** when he was young and impressionable. It's all self-centered laziness if you ask me and kids require and deserve more than that. If parents are unsure how to handle things then they need to reach out for advice. Even those that are divorced (including me) and have to deal with another household and those rules (and gifts and attitudes) affecting a child, can control what happens in their own home and what those expectations are. I'm not a believer in spanking, but the "naughty chair" works wonders, and with my older boys removing them from their social circle when necessary gets them straightened up real quick, so every kid is different and requires individual upbringing. It's the parent's responsibility to find what works with teaching their children how to act and to keep up with them. A small child will think screaming is okay if no one has taught them different, so it's not the kids fault. I do hold the parents responsible.

Answer 8

That is because the children of today, are being raised by the 80's and 90's generation parents. For them, it seems that they don't know how to discipline their kids. Parents are afraid of their kids and want to be their friends instead of guides and teachers.
I have no problem correcting my kids either in public, but my husband does. So, I have learned to wait until we get home.

Answer 9

Your right, now days we think that there's a way without spanking but it depends on every child because all are different. My kid needs a spank here and there sometimes and when i do it he calms down. U gotta be strict now that they're little and talk to them with a firm voice like u mean it. And i agree society now days thinks different and it's getting worse that's why kids are so out of control because they've been like that since they were little. Us parents need to focus more on their education.

Answer 10

I'm with you all the way...My kids were so well disciplined at a young age that I have no problem with them now that they're pre-teens/teenagers. It's these parents who want their kids to "express themselves" who are out of hand. Self expression is fine but kids need to know their boundaries so that they'll grow up to be decent, responsible, respectable and respectful adults.