2006-08-09 19:13:00 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
A husband was always saying sarcastic remarks to his wife. One day while they were riding in the country the husband sees a farm with the barnyard animals outside. He turns to his wife and says. "Your relatives?"
She smiles at him and responds, "Yes, my in-laws."
2006-08-09 19:23:50 · answer #1 · answered by the Goddess Angel 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
A man is walking down the street and he see a woman with the most perfect breasts imaginable.....He stops her and asks her if he can bite them for $100 dollars. She gets mad and refuses so he offers $1,000 dollars. Once again she is angry so he offers $10,000 dollars. She thinks thats a lot of money and says yes, but they should move into the alley so no one can see. She takes off her top and he starts feeling and licking her breasts. She says,"Are you going to bite them?" and he says, "No....it costs too much."
2006-08-09 19:19:34 · answer #2 · answered by Betty Sue 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
2 cannibals were eating a clown. One says to the other "does this taste funny to you?"
2006-08-09 19:17:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
little johnny is sitting in class when his teacher tells him to use the word fascinate in a sentence
johnny replies by saying " My sister's boobs are so big that when she tries to button up her shirt she can only Fasten 8"
hope u like it
2006-08-09 20:24:26 · answer #4 · answered by SeahawkMan 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A GIRL & GUY DECIDE TO HAVE SEX 4 THE 1ST TIME SO THEY MET IN FRONT OF A DRUG STORE.
GUY GOES IN 2 BUY A BOX OF CONDOMS,AS HE IS LOOKING 4 THEM A BEAUTIFUL WOMEN WALKS UP AND ASK HIM "CAN I HELP U" ? WELL THIS IS HIS 1st TIME SO HE IS EMBARESSED. HE LOOKS AROUND AND STUDDERS,YES DO YOU HAVE... UMM...ANY STRAWS.SURE SHE SAID..HE PAYS AND LEAVES
AT THE CAR THE GAL SAID DID U GET THEM? NO WELL THAT GOT HER MAD IF U DON'T GET THEM I AM LEAVING.
HE GOES BACK & THE SAME GIRL COMES UP 2 HIM "WELL CAN I HELP U SIR" AGAIN GET EMBARESSED YES DO U HAVE ANY TWISERS? SURE PAYS AND GOES BACK TO THE CAR..GAL ASKED" DID U GET THEM "NO NO!? WELL THATS IT I AM GOING HOME ...NO WAIT I WILL GO GET THEM THIS TIME PLEASE DON'T GO....O.K. 1 LAST CHANCE THEM I'M GONE....SO HE GOES BACK IN AND GUESS WHAT? THE SAME KNOCK OUT COMES UP ...YES SIR CAN I HEPL U AGAIN....WELL WITH ALL THE GUTS HE CAN MUSTER HE ASKED YES DO YOU HAVE ANY (IN A LOW WISPER)CONDOMS?......SURE WE DO ........................BUT SIR WILL U MAKE UP U MIND DO U WANT 2 SUCKER HER..PLUCKER HER...OR FUC*ER HER...LOL..I THINK THAT 1 IS SO CUTE...........SORRY SPELL CHECK IS DOWN SO IF I HAVE ANY TYPO ....SORRY
2006-08-09 19:36:38 · answer #5 · answered by meemeemee40 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Mom : Jane, my dear girl, if someone touch your breasts,
you must say, "Don't!" and if someone touch your p ussy,
you must say, "Stop!" so that he will stop doing it!
Jane : But, mom, yesterday a stranger came and touched
my breasts followed by my p ussy and I say, "Don't Stop!"
but the stranger did not stop touching it.
Mom : Oh, My God. You understand it in the other way, my
dear little girl!
2006-08-09 19:17:21 · answer #6 · answered by arifin ceper 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Teacher: Stop making V-signs, you naughty boy!
Boy: I'm only trying to count to two!
2006-08-09 23:51:09 · answer #7 · answered by Robert C 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Here is some reading that should keep you busy and make you smile
http://home.mindspring.com/~niton/taglines.htm
2006-08-09 19:19:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
" if i wanted to hear someone talk s*** behind my back, i would fart"
made me laugh anyway
2006-08-09 19:18:37 · answer #9 · answered by §ЕЖ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You got a D*ickfore on your head there!
2006-08-09 19:16:51 · answer #10 · answered by T 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋