I am in college and feel like I don't want to finish. I just want to get out and get married and get a job

Question

I am going into my 3rd year of college, and seriously, all I do is go to classes, then do what I want to do and never even really do anything because I always end up in an awkward situation whenever I do. I have no problem just doing what I want to do myself and not talking unless it is necessary, but I just feel like it affects the way other people think about me when I am around them if I am just around them and not talking. In the beginning I did try to go to activities, but I always found that so few people were in attendance, which made me feel awkward because I knew it was more likely that attention would be drawn towards me. I really don't even mind just going to classes, then doing what I want to do without other people. But I just feel like I just want to get out of college and do what I want to do. It would be so easy to just get out and get married and get a job. Because all I do is go to class, then do things myself. Just like having a job, then going home and doing things.

If I had a job I would just go to the job, and then go home and do things. This is basically just the same as going to my classes at college, then going to the dorm room or doing what I want to do. Because like most students can probably drive, or they probably do other things like have money to go out and stuff. But I am not like that. I can't drive, and I can't afford to go out or buy things. So I am pretty much just on campus 24/7 when I am there. It doesn't help that there are so few people at Bowie State, and on the weekends it is literally a ghost town. What is the point of me even being there? I should just not even be there. I could be doing so many other things. Getting a job, getting my own house, learning to drive...and I am 20 now. I don't want to waste any more of my life away like that in colleg. Life is too short.

Answer 1

i've been there before... in my case, i have been on the 10 yr plan FOREVER! it wasn't until a couple of years ago i realized working as a "paper pusher" (of course this may not be your choice) is never going to get any better. sure $1-2 raises here and there, but never the feeling of true achievement. i also realized that i am making someone else's dreams come true by working for them and raking in the money for their fortune. after you've been in school for a while and working at the same time... you easily lust for more money. money does bring happiness without a doubt, but by having that education under your belt will afford you better opportunities to have a more stable financial future. sure, it's a fact that not all college grads end up in the field they worked their butts off in, but it does happen.

perhaps you are going to school for all the wrong reasons. that was my problem. in the beginning of my college career, i did it because my parents wanted to see me do it, i picked a major because it sounded "successful"..but my heart wasn't into it, some of my friends who i compared my academic success to was doing it, it made me feel like i had something to identify with.. just being around peers after HS. now 11 yrs after HS i want to finish college more than anything and i am about 75% there.

education is one thing that no one can take away from you. it is yours, solely your success. people get married and sometimes the marriage doesn't work.. your education will always be with you no matter what. another way to look at it, you may get a job if you drop out of school, but that job may not exist forever. as a result, you'll be forced to find "a better job". after a while... you'll wish you had your degree to find something better than the average job.

i don't know how old you are, but someone once told me: "after you turn 26 (females), you start realizing what you really want in life... before you turn 26 you should be getting educated and prepping yourself for your future (career) and family". i've found that to be some solid piece of advice.

i agree life is too short, but wouldn't you rather know you accomplished something HUGE in life? stay in school hun. see a counselor and honestly choose a major that really interest you. when you take classes because you just have to without any personal goals behind it... you'll get bored and "want to move on". persevere!

**a couple of others things i want to add. you mentioned getting your own house. if you don't have any credit established (good credit that is), it will be hard to purchase a house if you don't have the type of income that will allow you to do so.

the other thing about getting married... my belief is that you should be independent as an individual first, before "becoming one" with another person. as expensive as life can be, it is more common nowadays that both spouses have to work to make ends meet. if you just have an "average" job, it will be a struggle.

finish school... it's your best bet!

Answer 2

Hi again - we were here this morning! This sounds very familiar. I felt the same way very often but my parents nagged and nagged until I finally graduated.

It sounds like you're just sick of all the requirements and the stuff that doesn't fit with your personality. Please stick it out. Years from now you'll know that you accomplished something even if you end up not using the actual degree. The married/job routine can get boring too especially if you have no decent education so the job is dull.

I was shy and alone a lot in school - never really fit with the crowd and had a very strict home life so there wasn't much to do. My boyfriend was at school in another state so my social life was the pits. But over the years I've really changed. Things that seemed to take forever when I was young now seem to have flown by. I've also found that people respect me now, often because I seem to have a unique perspective on things.

If you're going into your third year you should be starting in you major classes. This should be better than all those general credits.

One of the most hopeful things I ever heard was said by my mother in law years ago when she told me that being in your 50s is the best time of your life. Now that I'm there I can tell you that she was right. At least for us late-blooming types, things just get better. Hang in there. In a couple of years you won't remember the names and faces of your fellow students but you will have that knowledge that you faced a challenge and stuck it out.

Answer 3

i understand what you mean
i am going through the same thing
if you're in your third year, then you might as well finish it and get the degree
i'd suggest you come up with a plan of what you want to do after you graduate
then while you're still taking classes, you can take part time jobs that can provide great experience to the career you want
if it doesn't match then at least you have money saved up
good luck
I'm actually going to look for a job after my exams are done

Answer 4

Having a college education can enhace your carrer seeking a great deal. So I say, then focus on your studies harder to get college over with as soon as possible. I didn't go to college, tried to go back, dropped out due to money issues, and now I'm trying to find a job with just a GED. I wish that I had a college education so that I could support my family more than I am now.

Answer 5

you should finish college while you are young. with a college degree you can get higher paying jobs and better working conditions.