What do you do in a long distance relationship to keep the bond strong?

Question

Me and my boyfriend are both in the military, we were stationed in Germany together then he got orders to go back to the US and I got got deployed, I saw him 4 months ago for 2 weeks and then I had to leave again, it seems like he doesnt really give a crap about me because he hardly ever emails me back and I try to talk to him at least once a week. Is this a sign that he isnt that interested, but yet when ever I tell him I want to just gfo back to being friends he gets upset and says that he doesnt want that, is he trying to keep me on a short leash or what?? I swear he confuses the hell out of me, just when I have had enough he does or says something to pull me back in... Someone please give me some sound advice..

Answer 1

I wouldn't say that his not e-mailing you is a sign of disinterest. Perhaps he is lonely without you and worrying about you being deployed overseas. He may be trying to hide his head in the sand. He may have mixed emotions of where he sees the relationship going. Hey, I don't want it to sound like I'm trying to defend this man or anything but just giving some possible senario's. Communication is the key. Talk with your military man with an open and honest mind and express your concerns. This truly is the only way that your going to learn his intentions, if any, and the possibility on whether your long distance relationship will work out. I have a long distance relationship with a woman and we are very open and honest with each other at all times and are getting married next May. Best of luck to you with your long distance relationship also.

Answer 2

To me it sounds like he doesn't want to put in the time for what is needed in a long distance relationship, but he wants you, as you said on a leash for a back up plan if you guys ever get stationed in the same place again. The fact that he does or says something to pull you back in is a very strong message that he HAS to depend on such childish behavior to get you back. And you, who should be making up your own mind are LETTING him use a situation or words to pull you back when you really don't want to be. Sort of sounds like you are his puppet,, but not a happy one. You guys might not make it if your relationshipdepeds on leashes and confusion.
I say make up your own mind and then do what you need to do. Don't let him control you anymore. A relationship should be happy and fulfilling not draining and confusing.
You have had enough. Ask him what part of that doen't he understand. Stand firm. Who wants to be with somone who has to manilulate you to get you to hang in there with him?

This is a maturing experience for you. You are obviously a strong wonderful woman who functions well in the military. (and thank you for that) Don't let this guy take your power and strength from you. YOu deserve a guy who will adore you whether you are together or a world apart,
You are strong......stand up to him.

Answer 3

My fiance and I were in a long distance relationship in the beginning of our relationship (we are now living together and getting married next summer) and there was never a day that went by, where I didn't recieve an e-mail and at least two phone calls. If he really wanted to be your boyfriend he would make the effort. I think he is toying with your feelings. Get rid of him. You can do better. It takes two to make a relationship and it sounds like he isn't putting in the effort to make it work.

Answer 4

He sounds like a little kid who can't let go of his toy, and when somebody takes it away, he starts crying. This "little boy" needs to grow the hell up! Shoot, I know I'd be pissed if he wasn't sending me emails! If he can't take or make the time to send one little email then that's not boyfriend material. Well, for your sake, dump this idiot once and for all and get out of the confusing heap of BS. Hope this helps and good luck!