my bf has proposed to me, don't you think he would breaking up with me if I turn him down!?
pls help...
2006-08-09 17:00:02 · 27 answers · asked by Missy Jewels 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I wanna continue my studying and don't want an early marriage...he should have known
2006-08-09 17:05:00 · update #1
I don't think that a mature and understanding man would ever break up with his girl if he proposes to her and gets turned down. When you talk to him about your refusal to get married at this time, tell him the disadvantages of being married while studying because you may not be able to give him so much of your time as a wife. Besides, when you get married, the chance of you getting pregnant will be greater and if this happens, you may not be able to continue and finish your studies. Tell him that getting a degree, though it is not a 100% assurance, is a great factor in having a successful career in the future. Your pregrancy will force you to stop studying and when you give birth, your time will be focused on your child which may make it difficult for you to finish schooling.
Assure him, though, that when you are ready to get married, it will be him and him alone whom you will marry.
If after all your explanations, he decides to separate ways with you, you will have to make a wise decision. Will you marry him and not continue your studies? Will you marry him and take the risk but continue your studies? Will you accept his leaving you and continue your studies.
All these questions will have to be answered by you coming from your heart. Do what your heart will dictate. After all, you may just believe in Destiny for whatever happens between you and your boyfriend will have no weight regarding who the right man for you is when Destiny works towards showing him to you. If he breaks up with you, give him time to think about what he has done. If he realizes that it is you whom he really wants to marry, I'm sure he will ask for a reconciliation. If not, as I've mentioned earlier, let Destiny bring to your parth the man you truly deserve. Good luck.
2006-08-09 17:18:29 · answer #1 · answered by Ruzzo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he really loves you why would he break up with you if you turn down the engagment. ??
You also could have a long engagment so that you both get your education.
If you really don't want a proposal or any thought of long term with him, then maybe he shoud 't be your bf.
2006-08-10 00:13:58 · answer #2 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't make a life long mistake. If its not mutual then don't do it. There are already too many divorces because of people getting married just so they won't hurt the other person envoled or they do it thinking they will eventually fall in love with the person and it never happens so they end up cheating or not being happy then divorce
2006-08-10 00:04:08 · answer #3 · answered by LaToya J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, here's the deal. You have a boyfriend and he has asked you to marry him, yet you are going to tell him no but you are afraid he's going to dump you? What you have to think is...why don't you want to marry him? Is it that you don't really love him? Maybe you just like dating and no interest in marriage never? Maybe you do love him but you think you are too young to get married? Maybe it's something else...
Be honest with him, if you never want to get married with him then there's no point for him to stay with you becasue he is already ready for marriage and he would be waisting his time with you. But if you love him and would like to marry him someday, then you could tell him that you would love to marry him yet you think it's too soon and that you could both get engaged and have a long engagement and then get married when both of you are ready, if that is the case he might not dump you. It just depends, good luck!
2006-08-10 00:12:29 · answer #4 · answered by munich13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well he'd be stupid to break up with you JUST cause you turned his proposal down. If you're not ready then don't accept it. Don't let him pressure you into marriage either; otherwise, you may have a bit of a rocky marriage...Best Wishes!
2006-08-10 00:05:19 · answer #5 · answered by sweetzmk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Not if you don't want that. If you love him and think it's sudden, tell him that you need more time or that it's waaaaay
too early for you to make a decision like that.
My boyfriend has been asking me for years to marry him. We
love eachother and it's like we're married. We think we'll get married- but we still have lots of things to iron out.
He shouldn't be offended, you love him and want to wait a while.
As long as you think he has a shot, he should be okay with it.
2006-08-10 00:05:51 · answer #6 · answered by Linda S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably Not.
But you might consider these questions.
Do I have a strong character to resist the spirit of hopelessness?
When life does not go the way I planned, do I question God’s Power
Do I tend to be destroying, to resist to my own desire in stead of trusting God?
Do acknowledge my failure and seek forgiveness?
Do I have the strength of character that equips me with a quite confidence to stand firm in life challenges?
2006-08-10 00:10:24 · answer #7 · answered by J-M SEBA 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends why you are saying no. If you're saying, no, I'll never marry you then yes, he is likely to break up with you. If you're saying not right now, give me a few months to earn more money, finish university etc, then I think he'll stick around.
2006-08-10 00:10:45 · answer #8 · answered by Aussie Chick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I denied my hubby when he first proposed because I thought it was too soon (we had only been dating for about 4 months).....I just told him that it was too soon and I wasn't ready, but I loved him and still wanted to be the only one in his life.......He was patient and waited another 20 months, then we married........
2006-08-10 00:05:04 · answer #9 · answered by mizzzzthang 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he loves you he will understand and wait until you are ready. If he loves you he won't push you into something that you are not ready for. Yall don't want to get married and be unhappy because you rushed into things.
2006-08-10 00:06:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋