Back story. We met approx 4 years ago. we started out as just friends to talk to and nothing more since she was with someone and i was single. I had no interest. But as time went on i started to really like her and i started to fall in love with her and she started to have the same feelings too. I promised her i would wait for her and not have sex with any other slores. Three months after we met i had sex with some slore. I kinda hid it and she found out after i told her and she heard from a friend as well. She was really hurt and i regretted doing it. At that time i feel with a serious knee injury and had surgery. She was there for me every step of the way through EVERYTHING. I was depressed and she was there even though i hurt her deeply. She hung in there with me and she didnt have to. she had somebody and could have left me alone but she was there for me. time passes and things become good again. were in love. we cant see eachother cuz she didnt want to cheat.
2006-08-09 15:16:31 · 18 answers · asked by link7506 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
so we didnt cheat. i didnt wanna make her do that and she didnt want to either. Things are going great i love her she loves me. time passes and then last year she gets pregnant with her man. this is her second child she had the first before meeting me. i was crushed cuz i always wanted to be the one to have this child with her. After that things changed. i became cold to her and acted like an ******. and i slept with another girl. i hid stuff from her i told lies. i even lied to her face. i was a ******* asshole. i regret it with everything i have. recently there was a few huge problems and she left her man and we are now together. I love her to death. things arent perfect though. she sometimes seems distant and upset about the things that happened in the past. things still haunt her. she doesnt truely believe i love her. she knows i care about her and that i "like" her. but i dont like her i f'ing love her. My past is ******* up my future with her.
2006-08-09 15:20:19 · update #1
I have changed. i told her this before and i still ****** up and lied and hid things from her. i got to experience her pain and her sacrifices that she made for me first hand. she risked everything for me. she went through hell and i made her suffer. AS a man i do not make excuses for what i did and i know i was wrong and she didnt deserve any of it. she is a sweet warm kind gentle intelligent person who deserves the world and i wish i could give it to her. I have tears as i write this cuz i know i did her wrong so very wrong. i know we werent together but i feel like i did infact cheat on her and i did. i was an asshole for no reason. i hurt her for no reason. i lied and hid things that i shouldnt have. i wasnt a man. i didnt act like a man or how i was raised. i was raised better than this and i know im better than this. my problem is now that i have her i dont want to lose her. i need her in my life i love her and i cannot live without her.
2006-08-09 15:23:16 · update #2
i want to prove to her that i love her. how can i show her that i have changed that i really am dedicated to her and that i want to be with her and only her? i want her and i dont want to lose her. i am so very serious about her that its not even funny. theres a lot more things that happened but arent needed in this question. how can i prove to her that i love her and want to be with her till im dead?
2006-08-09 15:24:48 · update #3
p.s i was the reason she left her man. she left him for me and to be with me. i didnt add this in earlier but i am the reason she broke up with him.
2006-08-09 15:31:22 · update #4
You have a very inspiring love story.
Do not lose patience with her when she keeps remembering the past. I know its the past, but when somebody is deeply hurt, it's really hard to forget. What's important is she has forgiven you, afterall, you two are together now.
You say you love her deeply, she is one lucky girl. Make sure you won't cheat or hide something on her again.
Someday, when time passed, even if you recall of the past, you will smile about it thinking that all of those things happened and you still ended up together. That's what we call destined to be for one another.
Have a happy life together!
2006-08-09 15:29:53 · answer #1 · answered by Busy Diyosa 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well hun things do happen that we regret and yes you both have caused each other pain...I understand what you are going thru am pretty much in the same situation but maybe you try just stting down and explaining all you are feeling I know men have a hard time expressing their feelings until it is to late but seriously hun if you love her as much as you sound like you do take her to dinner then go to a quiet park or river front and spill your guts explain to her she is all you live for and that she is your reason for living right now she has so many mixed emotions and so do you so a quiet private gut spill is truely what is needed make sure you tell her everything you have told a billion strangers in yahoo...I know it is hard especially with the pain you both hold deep but you have to let go of the past or it will haunt you forever ask her to please forgive all your transgressions that it was out of stupidity,anger and pain of not having her in your life the way you so desperatly needed and wanted...Hun I hope all works out for the two of you's it truely seems you love this young lady very much and if she loves you the way it sounds she will forgive you and your love will grow stronger everyday...GOOD LUCK
2006-08-09 15:37:16 · answer #2 · answered by shell b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to show her that u r really regretful, give her time to get over it. She is really hurt but when she sees that ure trying to make her happy and that ur truly sorry she'll probably be more understanding and even though u guys are in love, try being just friends for a little while until any negative feelings go away then start again and give being in a serious relationship a chance. Do sweet thoughtful things for her or just try to tell her how much u care about her and that u would never hurt her again (and truly mean it) then see how it goes from there. Good luck.
2006-08-09 15:26:58 · answer #3 · answered by Tina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She left her other man for you. Great. That means that after all those years that she had that man, she still wanted to be with you. In one way, however, no offense meant, that was a form of cheating or dishonesty. Why did she allow him to have his second child with him if she didn't love him too? She could have prevented that. And during all those times that you were trying hard not to sleep with other women, you tried not to but just because you are a man who has physiological needs such as sex, you gave in. Wasn't it unfair on your part then that you were refraining from having sex with others while she was with her man and she could have sex with him for as long as they like? So, don't feel guilty about what you have done against her in the past. Live in the present with the future in your mind, your future of having her by your side for as long as forever.
She may be what you think she is as a woman but for me somehow, she also has some weaknesses. A strong woman will always fight for what is right and will not indulge herself in falling for sins or mistakes. An intelligent woman will not let the 2nd man that she loves to have a child with him because she should have chosen the 1st man in her life (who is you) to be the father of her child. She had her first baby with that man before you met her. Fine. But she had her 2nd child when she was telling you that she loved you so much. Didn't she even think that that would hurt you a lot.? But she let it happen leaving you brokenhearted and helpless.
But you said now you are together. If you believe that despite what I've mentioned above she is still that woman you want to share your whole life with, go ahead and be happy for she is with you. Treasure every moment that you will have with her. Make sure though that she loves you truly even just as half as you love her because her love for you will even grow stronger for as long as she receives so much love and caring from you. Show her your true love for her by being that very understanding, kind, and gentle man that every woman wants in her life. What things she did not see from or experience with her other man that you shower her with will move her heart closer to you. Women love romance. Be romantic every time possible. Give her gifts without any occasion at all. Bring her flowers when you get home to her heart's delight. Have dinner in affordable but cozy places where romance is in the offing.
And the best thing that you can do is summed up in one great maxim that I hold true in my heart: 'GIVE TO THE WORLD THE BEST YOU HAVE, AND THE BEST WILL COME BACK TO YOU."
In love it goes like this: 'GIVE THE BEST LOVE YOU COULD EVER GIVE, AND THE BEST LOVE WOULD COME BACK TO YOU."
Apply that in your life and your relationship with her will never go wrong. The best of luck to both of you.
2006-08-09 16:24:15 · answer #4 · answered by Ruzzo 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well all you can do is kiss her ***!!! and be there no matter what just like she did. and when she is distant thats when she needs the most love. keep at it and prove you love her. as time goes by you will both start to forget the past but it will take a lot of time. always be there for her and show her love any chance you get.
2006-08-09 15:27:13 · answer #5 · answered by FoxyLadyJO 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look lets be honest, if she's not willing to fight for the love that you two have then apparently its not as strong as you both believe. If she truly loved you she would've explained to that other guy how she feels and would've been with you. She's not your girlfriend and seriously all thats going on is that your just sitting on the sidelines looking at her live her life happily with her man while yours just dies and your left alone. If she hasn't dumped her man to be with you then believe me, it isn't worth it. Love is something that both of you should be working on together not just you hoping that one day you'll get your chance. Move on to someone better even if it hurts cause what you have with her isn't a girlfriend/boyfriend situation it's a strongly bonded friendship.
2006-08-09 15:44:22 · answer #6 · answered by maidenis m 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This doesn't sound like a healthy relationship. You shouldn't have cheated on her to begin with. Too much happened and I wouldn't blame her for not trusting you or completely loving you. This whole thing sounds like a mess so you two, or should I say SHE, are better off with other people.
2006-08-09 15:24:39 · answer #7 · answered by ♥iamsleepy♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you stupid???? It sounds to me like SHE doesn't love you. If she loved you as much as she said she did, she would of left her "man" a while back to be with you. You have nothing to feel bad about...yeah, u slept with "slores", but you were single...u had every right to sleep with whomever u wanted to, u were single...she had a boyfriend at the time, whom she had a kid with...look it sounds to me like you'r getting used...I would get out of it now while it's still fresh... don't settle... she's just being selfish... what you did in the past shouldn't affect your "relationship" with her now... but if she wants to start pulling out those cards...u pull out yours... just get out of it now....it'll hurt, but rememeber, whatever doesn't kill you, will only make you stronger. Peace!
2006-08-09 15:30:04 · answer #8 · answered by tweenky1982 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you need to ask her, does she see afuture with the man she is with or with you. she must decided and you must respect her decision. tell her no matter what she chooses you will always be her friend, through evrything. and tell her how much you appriciated her being with you during your knee surgery.
DONT PRESSURE HER
you should love every decision she makes. even if she chooses the other man. love is doing everything to make the other happy.
2006-08-09 15:23:01 · answer #9 · answered by ktluve22 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her u love her.better yet SHOW her u love her.take her somewhere,keep telling her u love her.tell her ur the only one i want and im sorry that i acted like such an asshole in the past.i love u,and always have.nothing will ever change that.
then kiss her deeply.good luck!
2006-08-09 15:27:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋