I met this girl 4 months ago in ballroom.She doesn’t have car.I accepted to give her ride.After 3 weeks I asked her out. She didn’t accept. she was seeing someone.Few days later, she called me and said they had broken up and she wanted to see if I still want to be with her.Since then she has been swinging between me and the ex.One day she says she wants to be with me the next day she says she has feeling for the ex.10 minutes later, she feels she is not getting the attention she needs, she picks her cell and calls the ex(to make me jealous!)(I do my best, but she is extremely sensitive/selfish she wants attention and everything else, 24/7 in her way).I’m very calm. Even if I get jealous, she would not be able to see that in my face or my acts.That drives her worse.I know she wants to make sure I care about her but I’m sick of being tested every 10 min.Could such a relationship go anywhere good, or I should get out of it? And if I really want to be with her (I love her)what should I do?
2006-08-09 12:46:39 · 20 answers · asked by Eric L 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
yal sound like me and my ex!
but difference was that he is so openly jelaous! i think by pretending you dont care might drive her to do the next to worse thing since she thinks the first isnt working. Im not advising you to throw a jealous-guy fit, but jsut calmly let her know whats "crossing the line" she needs boundaries... and if she continues.. well you know what to do.
any situation where the ex is still in the picture is dangerous. are you sure shes over him? I would still be careful. let her know what youre cool with and whats just not right. be blunt and no need to be a jerk, you can never go worng with the truth
2006-08-09 12:54:56 · answer #1 · answered by Bella 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You need to let her know in a kind calm way that you are not a doormat. Let her know that you care for her, but that you have needs, desires and feelings too. I have been in several relationships that were similiar. If she has no respect for you now, she probably never will. If you allow this to continue, it will only get worse. You are not her ex, and you never will be. Everyone has a right to be loved and respected. I think if she really and truly loved you, she wouldn't do these things to you. It might do you some good to take a break from each other and get your perspectives back in order. Maybe set the rule to date other people, and see if the relationship you have with each other is really what you both want. And remember, you are not a doormat for her to wipe her feet on as she pleases, and when she pleases. Take care of yourself, and you will see positive things again.
2006-08-09 13:06:19 · answer #2 · answered by Rayna D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This Girl with all the Red Flags she is raising is not the right person for you. Since you have seen and mention her being sensitive/ selfish and wants attention 24/7. If she is not getting enough attention from you she will call her ex on her cell phone, to make you feel jealous.
This is not a relationship, but a battle field on your feelings and well being as an individual. After life is already hard out there to have a girlfriend like this is a quagmire. You have already wrote of being sick of being tested every 10 minutes of showing you care about her.
Stop having this girl getting sick pleasure at the expense of your well being and peace of mind, by seeing you ready to drive up the wall over her.
The choice is yours to lose your health and peace of mind over some woman who don't love you after all as she is treating you badly. After she is tired of you she can and will move over to some one else and may be have his baby who she may treat differently.
2006-08-09 13:26:00 · answer #3 · answered by Premio 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her you need to just be friends until she figures out what she wants THEN treat her as you would a friend... no lovey-dovey type stuff. If she can't enjoy being with you as a friend, how can a relationship develop into something lasting to your old age when the friendship is the most important thing?
2006-08-09 12:51:54 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's a psycho. Lose that crazy girl! Don't let any woman treat you like that! She's getting a major kick out of watching you pine over her- let some other guy be the pawn in her game. I don't even know you, but I guarantee you can do much better.
2006-08-09 12:51:04 · answer #5 · answered by ?princesshousewife? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are just needing about 40 people to tell you what you already know. This relationship is going nowhere fast, and you are the one doing all the work and getting no reward. You deserve better!
2006-08-09 12:54:45 · answer #6 · answered by Kelli C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her strait up..."I love you and I care about you so much...BUT (yeah she's gonna know theres something wrong)---I'm tired of you playing around with my heart...I'm tired of my heart breaking everytime you call your ex. Yeah, i get jelous...but that's because i love and care about you so much...why can't you just see that. And i need to know, who do you want to be with...me or him?"...and she'll know your seriouse. I know this is going to be hard to do...but you can't just sit around and let her play with your heart like it's monopoly...take control...don't let her walk all over you no more...and if she picks you...then say..."R u sure?" and if she says Yes quickly then she's sure...but if she thinks about it for a lil bit..even more than 2 sec...then she's just useing you for attention...and you shouldn't have to put up with that. I know this would break your heart for you to break up with her...but it's what's best for your heart...She's ripping every piece of your heart one bit at a time...soon you won't have a heart no more...and what will you do then. Don't let her play with your heart like it's a game...Good Luck! Sorry that you have to go through this. God Bless!!!
2006-08-09 12:58:33 · answer #7 · answered by Nanner♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't see how the relationship could be healthy if she is triing to play both of you. I would get out while the relationship is still young. Tell her you need someone who is mature and doesn't play games.
2006-08-09 12:54:02 · answer #8 · answered by raindrop_33 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is not a sign of respect and thats what you need in your life,right?Just go with the flow and make sure she keeps her ex and see where you wind up in the end.
2006-08-09 12:52:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ummm i think you should let her go she doesn't really want you she is just using you as a rebound she wants her ex back so she's using you to make him jealous so my advice to you is find someone else
2006-08-09 13:01:27 · answer #10 · answered by brownskindime 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋