this is for single parents or maybe parents period?

Question

I am a single mom and everything is on me. I have to pay all the bills and everything else. It'sss back to school time and I had to not pay a bill in order to get my kids the stuff they need for school. The bill that did'nt get paid was the rent. I wrote a check thinking my bank would cover it but they did'nt. I just got the rest of the money from my retirement account but i'm still short cause of the bounce check fees. I don't know what to till my landlord and i'm afraid they might throw me out for writing a bounce check. I'm tried and stress to the max. I want to know if anyother parent out their goes through this. I feel alone and i'm tried.

Any good advice will be appriciated. Thanks

Answer 1

Hang in there I am a single parent of two sons.. and I daily weigh each bill to see which gets paid..but to be honest rent always come first.. then utilties. because we have no where else to take them providing a safe place comes first.. clothes can be obtained from gently used places, I buy school supplies from a dollar store.. everything a dollar. the only luxory i have is cable.. and i will drop that first before I let the rent go or the lights.. you know It is easy to buy into new school drama but depending on the kids they will need to learn to do with less. My kids know what comes first.. speak to your landlord.. tell them in writing when you can replace the balance and pay any late fees. When that happen too me.. I was removed from giving checks to only giving money orders? but once was enough I paid . hope this helps love to chat more if interested be blessed

Answer 2

Yes- actually, I'm married and we face the same problems- always having to rob Peter to pay Paul. If you don't make a habit of doing this, I'm sure a simple explanation with the truth will suffice, if your landlord is a halfway decent person. They are human too, and they know that things like this come up sometimes. Just be honest- at this point, there's not much you can do, so you have nothing to lose by telling the truth. Single moms encounter these problems a lot, and people tend to cut them a little slack because it's hard to raise kids on your own (or even with another person, for that matter!). Don't worry- it's just a moment in time that will quickly pass, and things will get back on track and be OK again. I would file for child support though- there's no excuse for the father not to step up and do his part too. It shouldn't all be on your shoulders.

Answer 3

Well...luckily for you they (per laws and such) cannot just evict you and throw you out. Their is a process and you could probably live their rent free for another 3 or 4 months till all the court crap is done. HOWEVER....I do not advise this. If you have been living in this apartment for a long time you may find that honesty is your best policy here. If you at least show that you intend to make rent in some way and are really upset by what happened that may be enough for you to get a couple days till pay day.

Working, and working hard...saving....and spending appropriately will help. For instance...I'm not one for last minute stuff but lets face it, you could have made your rent priority and bought the school stuff in a week or so. School isn't starting for at least a couple of weeks. You could have avoided this whole mess by just spending at the appropriate time and setting priorities for bills.

Answer 4

You are not alone! Every month it is stress figuring out which bill to put off or to pay on- I learned quick to pay rent and utilities first because usually the other companies(phone, cable, internet)will let you make payments. I also talked to a local church and they helped out one time. Call your local Salvation Army for a list of agency that will help get you through this rough month. Consider trying to get a child support order, whether he sees the child/ren or not-THEY still have a right to be supported by him.
Good Luck, I hope every thing gets better. Another thing, I try to look ahead a do lay away for Christmas, and school clothes. Really any occasion where alot of money at one time will be needed.

Answer 5

Ok hun, I was a single mom of 3 for 9 years. Now they are 11, 15 and 16. Its hard sooooo hard. We made it though with alot of faith and a ton of prayers. I wish I could tell you what to do or something. Maybe check with family services in your area there are alot of good resources there and please don't have too much pride it is ok to ask for help sometimes. I would be honest with the landlord maybe he will appreiciate your honesty and give you a break or a couple more weeks to get him the rent. I know the feeling of robbing Peter to pay Paul I did it for years. Best of luck to you. Sounds like you are a very good mother with your children coming first in your life. They will see it and love you for it. IS there father involed maybe he could help. I know I wasn't that lucky.

Answer 6

You have to do what you have to do but you picked the wrong bill to F with. You could skip the water bill every once in awhile or the cable bill as long as you catch up. But you don't F with where you live. You keep a roof over your heads. Also since you are alone, you need to learn to trim the fat off of bills. Carpool, turn offf cable or switch to basic, basic phone, turn down cell phone minutes. Reduce reduce reduce. Live within your means. Move to a house or partment you can afford. Your kids don't need name brand crap either. Get them what they need not what they want. See what government help you qualify for ad do whatever you HAVE to to get ahead at your job. It can wear you down but the other choice is to continue on the same path. Oh and no more kids.

Answer 7

I used to go through that... when I was a single mom. They are NOT going to through you out! They want their money, not to have to search for a new tenant. Don't worry, honey. Talk to your landlord and be truthful... my landlord used to let me pay the rent in two payments monthly instead of one and it helped me not feel so stretched. Maybe that could work for you. You don't beat yourself up. You did what you had to do for your kids and it is working out! Keep being a good mommy and don't worry... your home is not going anywhere darling. Turn on some music and have a dance party with your babies. That always cheers ME up.

Answer 8

This is only what I would do if I were a single mom interested in dating. I'd keep my dating life separate from my home life until I was in a serious committed marriage bound relationship, or dating for at least a year before introducing them to my child. I wouldn't hide that I was seeing someone from my child, I just wouldn't bring that someone into my child's life from the word go. Yes I am happily married to the father of my child but I grew up in a single parent household and my mom did NOTHING to shelter us from her many dating relationships. Off the top of my head I can name 5 guys from the time I was 7 until I was 11 that she dated casually and had no problem allowing them into our home from the moment they met. Unfortunately my older sister learned by example and when she became a single mom at 23 she put her son, who's now 13, through a never ending revolving door of men. Violent men, manboys, cheaters...etc etc. She'd start dating them, immediately introduce them to her son and either move them in or move in with them only to have it end TERRIBLY and put my nephew through emotional turmoil that most adults can't handle. She married, her 2nd husband, after only knowing him 6 months (and having broken up with him twice so he could go back to his baby's mother). He's kicked her and my nephew out onto the streets twice since they married in '07. I wouldn't wish that life on anyone! So I know you didn't ask for my life's story and who am I to tell anyone how to live, date or love. I just know there's a healthy way and a not so healthy way to be a single dating parent. I have no doubt your son is your priority and you always make decisions based on what is in his best interest. Lord help me I wish my sister could have done that for my nephew! I love that kid like he is my own!

Answer 9

I agree with Sleek (great answer by the way hon you have my vote already lol) Anyway she's right just go to your Landlord and be honest and maybe next time your feeling stretched like this either try paying a little extra in the months you have nothing special or let them know ahead of time

Answer 10

Every month cuz I'm still paying the all the bills of my ex that he was supposed to pay but doesn't, plus no child support and I make decent money but there is never enough, and I am sick of it. But I never write bad checks cuz it only makes it worse. My ex did steal my retirment and now I'm paying the IRS for that, so it could be worse...