Why is it that we tend to want what we cannot have and not want what is readily available to us?

Question

Is it asking too much to not want to "settle" for what will feel like a consolation prize especially if that prize may lie at least in part on co-dependence?
I try to explain that I'm not looking for "perfection", that's usually a pipe dream anyway, it's just that there are things (that I consider to be of the "non-superficial" variety) which I feel would compromise my personal standards and that's something that would make it hard to live with myself and therefore likely hard on the other person as well so I opt for limited or non-involvement with some people (including [if not especially...] some siblings).
So does that make me a bad person???
"I" don't think so, I just think it's my way of weeding the garden that is my life and freeing it from the bonds of an emotional oppression that would stifle, if not suffocate, that part of me that makes me what I am at my core.
It makes no sense to sow seeds of contention but rather to promote the growth of things more spiritual, ya think?

Answer 1

As you say, we frequently want what we cannot have; sometimes we DO have to 'settle' for what is readily available rather than going after a pipe dream. Dwelling on it will just make a person more unhappy, however, so it's better to make the best of the situation at hand. Having said that, you shouldn't do anything that will compromise your personal standards. After all, if you can't live with yourself, you're going to have a problem. Cutting certain people out of your life is not good either, however, and really only ought to be done in the worst of situations. Isn't there some sort of half-way point? Surely you can strive to find a way to interact and communicate without selling yourself out. Remember that God's command is to love one another, so ask yourself what the most loving response to this situation would be and try to work from there.

Answer 2

so what do you want that you can't have, and what is readily in front of you for the taking? this question is confusing.

not associating with family, will backfire. i don't know how it started with me and one of my relatives, but we didnt talk for so long that me and her arent even the same ppl anymore. we talk now, and we're okay with each other, but it's better to grow with the person, u may have problems with. fighting or not, i would change that if i could so i hope this answers the Q? idk good luck :)