What should i do?

Question

my ex boyfriend is a good friend of my brother-in-law. but since we are no longer together my ex still seems to be going to my family functions or hanging out at my family's homes. it bothers me because we are no longer a couple and i am seeing someone else. how could i bring my new man around my family if my ex is always hanging out? or how do i tell my family not to invite my ex over as much?
my family is really stuck on seeing my ex and i back together. but i dont want that for the fact of him saying we are not compatible. i have finally come to terms with that and would like my family to understand it also.

Answer 1

I don't know how often you have family functions, but if this is too often that it is bothering you, I would show your family that you won't be there when your ex is present (for example when he comes over to hang out, you could hang with your friends or your new man). You can tell them that you don't want to make your ex feel uncomfortable when you bring your new man over, or you could invite them to dinner or pizza and introduce him then. Once you've made introductions it might be easier. Although, I would still mention that you don't want to hurt your ex so it'd be better if they didn't invite him to the upcoming function (I wouldn't do it all the time though, they may be offended - especially if he is a Friend of the family). Good luck!!

Answer 2

Your family retains their right to invite whomever they have a likng to. You have the right to be there and to bring along whomevevr you have a likng to. You cannot stop going to places where the ex will be, that's redundant. The more your folks and friends see you and your new man together the quicker they all will get the message. If you are no longer a couple then it should not bother you, period, at any time. You need to come to terms with the fact that whatever feelings you had for the ex, are now defunct, past history, there should be NO FEELINGS at all, of any kind. Don't worry about what he's feeling or thinking, cocentrate on your new man's feelings and what he's thinking about. Don't avoid talking to your ex either, casual conversation is another good message telling him and everyone else that you are through as a couple. Enjoy your new man, make him feel special and he will do likewise. I've been married for 43 years this month. I treat my wife like a queen, she treats me like a king. The secret ? LOVE !!

Answer 3

Agree with others comments but would add this
not meaning to be "funny" nor disrespectful
Bring the new boy friend, and make sure to kiss him at least twice during each family gathering where everyone can see you doing it - and no I don't mean make out in the living room - just long enough so every gets the idea you like the "new" guy "better"

Worked for me when I had this type of family problems over new girl friends

Answer 4

Unfortunately, he's good friends with your brother-in-law and since your family likes him, I would resign yourself to seeing him at functions. I would not let his presence stop me from bringing my new boyfriend to functions. It's your family and if your ex doesn't like it, then he can leave.

Answer 5

Trouble here is, you can't control your family's friends. They have a right to invite him.

Does he actually do anything to bother you? If not, then ignore him.

You might try explaining to your family members that you are no longer interested in him. Then refuse to discuss it, if they keep bugging you.

Over time, they will give up.

Answer 6

well why dont u try to get along wiv ur ex, then that ways you could still go over there.if he is good friends with wour brother-in-law then you cant break it up. try to be friends with him!
maybe it will help

Answer 7

Well i think you should set down with your family and tell them how you fell make them understand that your relationship with that man is over and that his visits make you uncomfortable.