Help from Mama's.?

Question

I have a 19 month old boy and he is excellent......most of the time. Everytime we go into the store he isnt bad... but wants to run around, play with toys, screams murder if I pick him up. And I have spanked him and he dont care. People said the leash thing well no he aint a dog, I just want ideas to try and get him to behave and stay by mama in the stores.

Answer 1

Definatley No leash I agree with that, I would try a stroller, and I personally am not above bribing,say a small treat,when he starts up bend down to his level and look him in the eye and in a deep voice say NO,then put him in the cart and let him have his fit eventually he will calm down but ignore his behavoir as much as possible he is testing yours and others limits and trying to get a reaction from you, also at this age he is very curious, tell him simply if he can't walk like a big boy he has to ride like a baby.

Answer 2

Without a word - drop your purchases - Pick him up - let him scream - and march him out of that store as soon as he acts up.
strap him in his car seat and go home
Before you do this, and before you go to the store, you explain to him that unless he can stay with you, walk nicely and look but not touch, this will be the consequence.
Children are not stupid, a 19 month old understands everything you say and will understand that you mean business when you follow through.
Do it every time
He'll get the idea soon enough
:)
PS NEVER buy him anything when you are in the store. You can reward him later if he is good with an icecream at home or some little toy or a treat of some sort.

Answer 3

I would agree with the stroller idea. Sometimes a stroller takes some getting used to, especially with an opportunist child like yours (AND MINE!!). Last year both my older sons played baseball, and my 2 yr old would run EVERYWHERE and I didn't get to watch practice or games. Also, of course, he was driving everyone nuts distracting them. At first I started with the car seat. I would strap him in and sit him on the bleachers. And he fought for the first week or so.... that period is tough. Then we moved to the stroller. But parents, they WILL get used to it and learn that's how it's gonna be!! I promise! Then just make sure you're CONSISTENT and you use the stroller every time. Then you will be able to shop with only minor problems like everyone else with a baby! Good luck!

Answer 4

I think you need to try to set realistic expectations for him. He's only 19 months old. The store is an AMAZING place when you're that young. Try to look at it through his eyes.

What does he see when you go to the store? TONS of colors. TONS of shapes. TONS of sounds. TONS of people. LOTS of stimulation all around him. And then.....there are TOYS?! WOW! Let's play!

Will he ride in the cart? Would he let you carry him in a sling? Then you can control when and if you let him down to walk around.

Make a rule......if he wants to walk then he must stay in sight of you. If he goes out of your sight, he goes in the cart. OR......if he wants to walk he has to keep one hand on the cart at all times. If he breaks the rule, he goes in the cart. Remind him that we WALK in stores and RUN on the playground. Remind him that running isn't safe. If he won't walk, he goes in the cart.

YES......he might scream or cry if you put him in the cart. AND THEN, if he doesn't calm down and stop, you might have to LEAVE the store. (Make this clear to him before you even go in. Review what you expect behaviour wise and what the consequences are if he does not behave.) This is going to teach him that you mean business and you're serious about setting these limits for his behaviour in public.

Please don't spank him. It isn't working and it doesn't teach him anything positive. You want to teach him how to behave and spanking really doesn't do that. It teaches "don't get caught" or "it's OK to hit if you're bigger" but NOT the lesson you are looking for here.

You can also bring along a snack for him to eat in the cart or keep a small Ziplock bag in your purse with suckers. You can distract him with a sucker BEFORE his behaviour gets off track.

ALSO.....
You should never refer to your CHILD as "good" or "bad" as mentioned below. You can comment on "good behaviour" or "bad behaviour" but DO NOT label the CHILD as "good" or "bad."

Answer 5

I think its just a phase. I have a 2 1/2 year old and a 4year old and they both went through that stage. Just kinda grin and bear it for right now. If he is good most of the time then he is just being a child. It will get better I promise and even when they get 4 year olds its something else, like my little girl doesn't want to hold my hand anymore she doesn't run off she just wants to walk by herself. He is just a child and thats what they do.

Answer 6

My oldest, now 27, threw one fit in a store at age two. He wanted something, I said not today, and he hit the floor. I let him yell for a few seconds, leaned over him, and as loud as possible said "Good-bye". I walked off. That little man was stunned. I didn't get twenty feet away before he caught me. About five years later, his little brother made the same attempt to get his way. My oldest jumped and told him that was a bad move.

Answer 7

My girl was just the same and i would get so imbarised as every one watched me having ago at my screaming child, then i started to just drop everything and take her straight home, explaining that we had to go home because she was being a bad girl.
Now when ever we go out i tell her if she is good i will get her a treat on the way home.
And she is as good as gold now

Answer 8

I haven't had much of that problem yet. My daughter is two, and has always ridden in the shopping cart. Even if I get only a couple of things, I put her in the cart. She does have a fit once in awhile if she gets mad at me for something, and says she wants to get out, but I just hurry to get what I need and get out.

Answer 9

Put him in a stroller, and if he refuses, then leave the store. Being good is a reward to go out in public. If not, he can go home and play in his room by himself.

Answer 10

DOs and DONTs
DO- take action the first time everytime
immediately leave and go home
when you get home use what ever form of punishment you
use
DONT - bribe, warn, threaten, ignore or otherwise condone the
behavior