Why is sex before marriage religiously forbidden?

Question

If you're engaged or planning to get married, why is it sinful to have sex? Please don’t simply quote scripture unless it actually explains why. I want to hear original thoughts.

To His Divine Shadow: Hey, idiot, did you even read my question? I said “Please don’t simply quote scripture UNLESS IT ACTUALLY EXPLAINS WHY.” You can quote all the scripture you want if it answers my question.

For everyone who said pre-marital sex can lead to single parents: so too can marital sex. Divorce is rampant nowadays, and there are many single parents as a result of it. You can also save yourself for marriage, and then get divorced. How is that any different than breaking off an engagement? In both cases, you assume you’ll be with that person forever, but, sadly, that does not turn out to be the case.

Answer 1

This is only my opinion of course but my belief as to why God doesn't want people to have sex before they marry is because it misleads people.

Think about it. If your focus was not on sex, what is it that you would be looking for in a life partner?

Sex tends to cloud that issue. We get all absorbed in it and it's such a wonderful feeling that we think sex is love and it isn't.

But we are so absorbed in that "courtship sex" let's call it (and let's not mistake it for "honeymoon sex" which is pure rapture followed by soon to be nightly, then weekly/monthly/ or non-existing sex in years to follow!) but the truth is when you base the reason for marrying primarily on sex, or because of the fact that you have had sex you feel you have to marry....you are doing it all for the wrong reason. You are bringing children in to this world who will be raised in either unhappy or broken marriages, etc. etc. etc. which is where we are at in the world today no?

So I think God intended for us not to focus on SEX and put it so high on a pedestal as society has done...so much so that they have warped it into homosexuality and I don't know where it was written that priests should be celebate...perhaps there would be so much less perversion if we had just stuck to the rules God gave us right?

Ultimately I think God wanted man and woman to cultivate respect and love and kindness towards one another, the celebration of which should be sex when you marry. You should love the person you marry as that is what God wanted for us all...to be happy, have a healthy sex life which is an expression of love for your mate.

That's my 2 cents on the issue.

Answer 2

Engaged or 'planning to get married' isn't marriage. N sometimes, for some reasons, just before the wedding, the couple break away. It has happened with many people many times before. If there is sex and a child unintentionally, than the child often has mental problems which dosn't show on the outsent sometimes. Sometimes, the kid starts to think that he is not wanted. Sometimes, the kid starts to think that my biological parents never married becasue of me. I created problems before I was born. The poor kid starts feeling guilty without ever doing a mistake.

Another thing is, there are girls who sometimes, even though they are engaged and everything, have other boyfriends and such. There are such things as 'mistresses' and 'extra-martial' affairs. When these things happen, the mother dosn't know who the father of the child is. That also creates problems. I agree that modern science has proved it otherwise and now, genetically, u can know who the parents are but in many cases, the parents cannot afford it. By the time the poor kid grows up, it is too late. Have u ever wondered why the children of prostitiutes are so metnally unhealthy?????

there are many many many reasons but they cannot be discussed just like that. Almighty, Al-wise, Al-Supreme created us so He should know what is good for us and what is bad for us anyway, right????

Answer 3

I believe it is because of an old saying why buy the cow if you are all ready getting the milk. Maybe because more people will enter matrimony if they don't have sex before the marriage. If you are sampling the product why buy it. But I believe that a piece of paper does not mean commitment anymore. If the commitment to each other is there a piece of paper saying you are married is not going to change things. I also believe it was so you would not have children born out of wedlock. It used to be a black mark against you to have a child if you was not married. People also believe you have lose morals if you had a child out of wedlock. It was the women and children who suffered from this in olden times. It never damaged a mans reputation 100 years or so ago. Basically nowadays the paper entitles you to some rights. It means you make the decision on your spouses medical condition if they are unable to and you get to keep the house if your spouse dies unless there is a will stating something else.

Answer 4

This is one topic where religion and science have very inter-validating, concuring positions that are practical and reasonable.

From being in Catholic school for 12 years I can tell you that there are some very practical reasons that people don't observe today because of some advances in technology and medicine.
Historically, Sexual intercourse spreads disease very fast and there was not the medical technology to fight diseases. STD's are not only physically debilitating, also mentally, as some diseases like Gonorrhea and Syphilis.
Today, the availability of condoms (male & female), IUD (Itra Uterine Device), Birth control and similar devices has done alot to cut down probablity of pregnancy & transmission of STDs, but does NOT eliminate it, abstanance is the only real 100% effective solution.
Adultery is similar, however is not premarital, it was seen as a sin to split a married couple spiritually, and that it corupted the womb and the spirituality of the marrige.
Premarital intercourse is seen a sin because it corupts the bond that makes marrige special. Sexual intercourse is seen as a privialge of legitimately married couples.
Medically, scientifically, sexual intercourse has many results and consequences that are pleasureable, yet still mentally and physically debilitating. There is psychological and psychiatric evidence that irresponsible sexual behavior does affect the mind adversely and compels and individual to other behaviors that are sociologically and psychologically damaging. There is a subconscious bond between individuals that participate sexual intercourse, without public witness (hence an illegitamte bond), that the bond is not sanctioned an individual may experience a psychosis that compels violence if their mate has been "violated" by another individual. As a result any products of sexual intercourse is seen as an illegitmate child. Therefore marrige is a vital spiritual, sociologically, and psychologically validating bond. I hope this helps.

Answer 5

Planning to get married isn't being married. People end engagements for lots of reasons. Having sex is an incredibly powerful experience, the real and intimate joining of a man and a woman. I think people are fools about it. They use it like an amusement park ride, and all sorts of pain can come from it. Rejection, STD's, pregnancy, disappointment, broken relationships, hurt, trust issues, etc. etc. God doesn't give us guidelines in order to "take away" fun. He loves us so much, He wants to protect us from hurt. That is why God intended sexual relations between a man and a woman, partners in a marriage relationship, with love and trust as a foundation.

Answer 6

In the day when the bible was written marriage was usually just when a man and woman started living together. Today we still have the same thing in a common law marriage, although it is not recognized until I believe 7 years. I think once you start living together and as long as you are committed to being with that person and plan on being married what is the difference.

Answer 7

Because marriage was the only way a man could claim the children. Without that bond a man could not prove he was the father which gave women the power of continuing the tribe. Men are very insecure when women have too much power and male dominated religions had to have some way to limit the power of giving birth.

Answer 8

The majority of mental problems are caused because of traumatic experiences in a child's life. If you have sex and this results in a pregnancy is it fair to cause your child so much misery that he/she will be emotionally scared for life? I don't think so. Insisting on only allowing sex after marriage goes someway to ensuring that any child that is produced because of sexual activity will at least have a home with two parents. So the concern is for the children which might be produced having a greater precedence over a momentary selfish act of pleasure.

Answer 9

Because in Christianity ( I cannot speak for other religions) sex is ment to be a unifying act. It is the mutual complete self giving of yourself to your spouse. It is an act that you are doing that can create a new life, and because of that, it is a holy act and doing it sheerley for pleasure out of the context of marraige is selfish, and if you do have a child, you are denying it the security of a loving family. I am not ragging on single parents, I am just stating what I believe.

Answer 10

It's a sin in the eyes of God.

Personally, I'm a sinner. Engaged since December, with my fiance since June of '02, and have had pre-marital sex. God has not smited (smoted? smitten?) me yet.

I just don't think of it as a sin. There are worse things you could do (like kill a man), and still be forgiven for it.