I do I make my boys understand they cant play sports?

Question

we live in a very small country town. The nearest school is about 15 miles north of us. I work about 45 miles south of us. Because of our location and the amount of drive time between the places, we cant enroll our boys in any sports or activities. There would be no way to get home in time to get them to games or practice. I dont get home till almost 6:30. They have to stay with a neighbor till me or my husband get home. He is a truck driver so we never know his schedule day to day. Obviously there are not sports or activities besides church in our town that they can be in. None of their school friends live in our town, and we dont even know any of their parents anyways, so having someone else take them and pick them up for games, practice, etc. isnt even an option. It is hard to explain all this to two boys. How do we make them understand that it just isnt possible for my husband and I to work and get them involved in sports also right now?

Sorry I meant to say HOW DO I...

My husband and I bought this house when my son was 6 and his son didnt even live with us.I am not about to up and sell my house and move just for the sake of sports.Also as I said we live in a very small town so we have to drive a long ways to a town with any jobs in our fields.Our kids school district happens to be in a town where no jobs in our fields were available and we have to work to feed our kids, so no I am not being selfish nor do I just simply not want them to play sports I work until 5:15 or so and then have to make it to the daycare 25 minutes away to pick up my youngest and then still drive home, and the town where they go to school would still be another 20-25 minutes furthur.Unless my husband and I get off work at about 3:00 we would never be able to make it to the games or practices during the week.Most of their school friends live in the town with the school and I am never around any of their parents.Should I call some parent out of the blue and ask them to do it ?

Another detail: This may sound odd to some people but my kid have friends at school, but dont go to their houses or have them over to ours. They really dont ask to do either, so that is why I dont know their parents.

Answer 1

Don't listen to all the people telling you you are a bad parent.. My mom was a single mom, with absolutely no help from my dad.. and so she had to work. She worked whenever they told her to.. whether it was nights, weekends, holidays, crazy houred split shifts.. the only activity we had growing up was church. It doesn't make you a bad parent.. it just means that keeping your job and providing for your family is more important then them playing sports.. it's not like you can just live in a box so your kids can play football.. and they will not turn out gay.. to whomever said that.. just because they don't play sports..

However.. maybe you could try to get to know some of their friends parents. Maybe on a day when you weren't working.. you could go over to the town and meet some people.. then it might be possible that you could let them go to sporting events with their friends, and you'd just have to drive the extra 15 miles to pick them up.

Your kids will turn out normal..

Maybe find an activity they each like that you could do together as a family. Then when you get home at night, they can help you with dinner and maybe on tuesday you can do one kid's activity and on thursday you can do the other kid's activity.

I spent every afternoon from 3rd grade on making dinner for my mom so that she could spend more time with us when she came home from work..

Also, try to find a neighbor that can watch them that has kids their age.. that way they will still be outdoors acting like boys, and they can do it right at home.

Answer 2

When I was a kid, we lived the same distance from school. There were other children that lived in the area.. not neighbors by any means. But they were more then willing to let us tag along to games and practice. You could try going to a PTO meeting or parent teacher conference. You will likely meet other parents there that would be willing to help you out. You could also call the coaches of the sports your children would like to play. They may know of other parents in your area. If you don't know the parents of any of the children your kids go to school with, how will you know they wouldn't be willing?
Don't cut sports out of your childrens lives. It could mean a scholarship down the road. And it will teach them to interact with other children. It will teach them teamwork.
I know it seems hard, but there must be a way to work it into your schedule somehow.
Tell your children you will try to work something out, but not to get their hopes up. That it might not turn out like they hope. But that way, at least they will know you tried instead of just giving up. You could also try finding a teenage sitter that drives. They could wait for your children to finish practice and then bring them home. For games, you could let the children stay at school until after the event, and you can pick them up on your way home. Basically, where there is a will, there's a way.

Answer 3

First, not knowing your kids' friends' parents --- not a good idea. Knowing the parents lets you know which kids are a little more trustworthy and which ones aren't. So regardless of the sports issue - LEARN THE PARENTS!

Second, if this is a big deal to them, you should really try to find a way to make this happen. I've coached for 15 years, long before I even had kids on any of my teams, and I can tell you that the lessons boys learn from sports is INVALUABLE.

Make some friends. Contact the directors of the local sports leagues and explain. In our town, we sometimes have parents who can't make it to games that we can accomodate with a little creative carpooling and planning.

MAKE THIS HAPPEN. It is important for your boys, and they will love you for it.

Answer 4

All children need social activities, and sports are a great way to keep kids healthy and active. I suggest you take the time to get to know the other parents. Try to get to know the parents of the other children on the team that your kids want to play on. Arrange for a car pool. Explain that you have to work to be able to get the things they need, and you may not be able to come and watch every game, but you will try to make some time in your work schedual to allow to come to some of them. Also try talking to some of your friends or people in your church and ask if they would be availiable to take them occasionaly.

Answer 5

Is it possible for you to move closer to town. Maybe a town closer to your work so your kids will have more social interaction that with just each other. Also if you move closer to your work you may get home in time to attend some of their games and other school activities.

Answer 6

Maybe set something up in your yard. Let them know that it's just not possible right now. Really, that's about all you can do. But I'd get them some balls or something that they can play with each other. Maybe some kid's martial arts tapes, so when you get home you can all practice martial arts together (more forms and stuff, but it'd be something energetic).

Answer 7

Have you considered hiring someone to drive them to sports? Maybe a local high schooler or young adult? I know you said you live in a small town, but there must be someone looking for a very part-time job. You should be able to advertise cheaply in the local newspaper, or if you live close to a major city try craigslist. Good luck.

Answer 8

I'm a guy who absolutely hates sports as well. Take up a hobby like music or something. Screw sports.

Answer 9

depends on how old they are, if they are old enough for them to ride bikes back and forth i would say do that. or maybe make friends with the coach or other parents. The easiest way is to actually go on a wlak with the or bike ride with them to and from school once and show them how far it actually is and how much energy they would need to do that every day.

Answer 10

Maybe you could talk to their teachers and find parents that are able and willing to take your boys to some of these programs.I mean, if they're going anyway, and because you're a distance gas money would be offered, it can be an option...