Ok look I have this son and he talk back to me I yell at him and everything, I ground him I do alot of things?

Question

It just isnt working plz tell me how I can help my son

Answer 1

If he talks back to you say this calmly without yelling:
"If you choose to talk back to me, you may do so in your room with the door closed in a hushed whisper, otherwise, if you continue this behavior you won't leave your room until you've gotten it all out of you."

good luck

Answer 2

First of all, you are asking parenting advice on Yahoo! answers. That's the first obvious problem. You don't even sound educated so I'm guessing you are a drop out. You need to get the F*ck off the computer then pay attention to your son. He doesn't listen to you because your F@T @SS is planted so firmly to the chair that he doesn't see you doing anything that's going to keep him from doing whatever he wants.. if I was your child I would listen to you either cuz I wouldn't respect someone I was smarter than. Where are you're parents? Why aren't they telling you what to do? and Where's your man? Are you living off of his money?

Answer 3

Never give in. Don't ever say he's grounded without going through with it. Every time he talks back to you don't let it slide. If he is little a few smacks on the butt won't hurt. If he is older take something away, video games, TV, computer, etc. If you don't keep after him it will only get worse

Answer 4

First and formost sit him down and get to the root of things. Find out what is causing him to act out. Once you have accomplished that help him to understand that you love him and that you are willing to help him through his ordeal. If that doesn't help maybe some family therapy could help. Most important keep the lines of communication open so that way he can be comfortable coming to you with his problems. Fighting never solves the problem it only makes it worse. Good luck.

Answer 5

this depends mostly on how old he is. at any age yelling is not good. and a lot of things just makes him thing you cant figure it out. try asking him what you need to do to be his friend, you don't want to fight with him. and perhaps he would rather not fight with you either. perhaps he feels like he is grown enough to be treated like an adult. so deal with him as such. you make the rules but let him assist. if he has a say in the rules perhaps he will find them easier to follow. but make sure he does it in an adult fashon with adult rules. if that does not apply email me please

Answer 6

When you yell at your son and everything, you are teaching him to talk to back to you. You are modeling for him how to express his feelings! and handle his anger!.

When he 'talks back' he's trying to communicate. Right there, that is a good thing. You can evaluate your relationship, and in your frustration, take a moment to be glad he's still talking!

You want to encourage him to communicate more. You want to shut down this talking back because you don't feel respected and you will have to teach him by respectfully sharing with him your feelings and expectations. It is totally a two way street and you are the grownup who is supposed to be leadnig the way.

As you can see, grounding isn't working. SPanking and hitting don't work. Usually, punishment itself does not work. What works is guidance, lots of love in the early years so that you raise a child who wants to please you - a child who is hit, put in day care, shushed up doesn't feel like pleasing you - this child understandably and righteously is angry.

However, everyone must learn to act right. Therefore, you teach your son this by doing it yourself, by expresing your feelings, expectations, and rules in clear, non-abusive, non-blaming, non-put-down language. I highly recommend a book "How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk." There are very clear examples of how to improve your communication with your child, how to get the rules of your house followed (assuming they actually are reasonable), and how to keep people on good terms with each other.

I would say the number one thing to do is to create more positive interactions and times with him where you both enjoy yourself. Create spaces in your relationship where there is no space, no judgement, just you getting to know him, encouraging him to share, spending time doing what he likes to do. Plus, thank him when he helps you, however how small. Give attention to good and desirable behaviors and you will get more of it.

I still wonder what you mean by talking back. Are you mad just because he expressed his opinions after you tell him something? If a parent tries to crush a kid's 'talking back' and create perfect obedience, then a parent has created a child perfect for a non-free society where he will always take orders and never question.

You want a child who questions, challenges, offers his own ideas (yes, you do, as a responsible parent you want him to develop his spine and confidence - too many 'don't talk back' parents want completely crushed kids who are 'easy' to manage - until they explode with rage as teens or self-destruct because they're too afraid to get openly angry!)

You also want a child who expresses his ideas with respect for others. You get that by modeling it all his life, teaching him how to do it. If you have, and he's just testosterone charged, then you gently remind him he must control himself, not get in your face, not be rude. If you haven't, then start now and share with him that it's made you unhappy that you too keep butting heads and you want to do what it takes to make things better.

Then, ask him what that would be and don't interrupt, don't put down a single idea, don't suggest ideas - i'm sure he's heard all yours a million times, get him talking and understand what he's saying.

Good luck! You guys are worth it.

Answer 7

If you yell at him or reprimand him physically he'll do it more just to spite you. Try talking to him first. IF he doesn't stop, you don't really have a choice. My brother talks back to my mother and he and I have talked about it and he insists that if she listened instead of yelling at him he would hold his tongue a bit better. Then again, it does depend on age...

Answer 8

First of all yelling at him is not the answer to anything! Now for a good answer we need to know how old he is. Tell me that and i can tell you what to do. But no yelling. :)

Answer 9

Publi school is probably the reason for his rebelion> I would put him in private school Where he will be taught moral obedience and respect the right way to live life

Answer 10

How old is the child? The discipline sort of depends on the age.