How do you deal with family when you convert to another religion?

Question

I converted to Muslim about 5 years ago, right after 9/11. My husband and I both are and I have been at odds with some family members since then. Coming from Seventh Day Adventist, which I have found some interesting details about that cause for questioning, it is seen like an immediate path to hell. I disagree with the SDA faith and how it was founded, on a lie. How do you deal with family who you love dearly, when they treat you as if you are different just because of that? I think it is an over generalization because of the war that causes people to have opinions on things they have no knowledge of. I am an African American Muslim in America, along with many others of the fastest growing religion there is. I am firm on my beliefs and have to constantly argue it, I have the facts and yet they still refuse to listen, instead they ATTEMPT to fill my head with more lies that have facts to them that they are lies!! How hypocritical is that??

Answer 1

Religions tend to be defensive. I turned athiest, and then became agnostic. My dad didn't care, because he was only Christian because he liked the idea of some kind of higher power (and honestly, I don't think he's really a Christian persay, and most of the fundys wouldn't accept him as one). My mom on the other hand was and still is uber Christian, and for a long time was pretty overbearing about it. I've ultimately ended up going to Church with her on Christmas as her Christmas present once or twice: it makes her happy, my beliefs don't change (it's annoying to put up with, but that's not something I can't afford), there we go. Hmmmm...

People are fearful of Islam because the islamic fundamentalists use their religion to attack those that think differently. So let's use a comparison: Christian fundamentalists bomb abortion clinics (sometimes). Is there Christian outrage against these abortion clinic bombers? I'm gonna say no, because we don't identify them as being "Christian" we identify them as being insane. So when the Christian community at large views muslim as being evil and destructive because there's no Muslim outrage at the violence of their fundamentalists. But it's a double standard, because the muslims don't think of the terrorists in terms of being muslim, they think of them as... well, some obviously think they're heroes, but a lot of them think they're just terrorists. I mean, there are plenty of muslim people killed in terrorist attacks too... hmmm...

I guess it's just the difficulty of identifying ones self with violence. We expect it of people so they can notably reject it. But no one really does it...

Answer 2

It is hard, I know. I converted from Christianity to Paganism 10 years ago and I still haven't had the courage to tell some of my family. My mother's been cool about it, as have my sisters, but I am not so sure about the rest of my family. I wish I had some advice, or at least some good stuff, but I'm sure it's especially hard with the rampant bigotry being directed against Muslims nowadays. You just have to let your family know that if they really love you, if they really want to do the Christian thing, then they will accept who you have become and embrace you with love rather than insult your new ways or turn away from you. And if they do...well I really hate to say it, but you are probaly better off without them. Real family and friends accept you for who you are.

Answer 3

I don't know why supposedly being the fastest growing makes it of God.

I know many good peacefull loving Muslims. Muslims have it easy in the US. I have no problem with them.

I just don't want the US to be an Islamic state, google Islam in Iran, it is way different than Islam in the US, for now anyway.

But you have to follow your own path, there is a lot of mis-understanding of the Muslims. At least here in the US you are free to convert to Islam, your brothers and sisters in Iran don't have the option to leave.

By the way, I don't believe what the SDA's believe either, they dislike Catholics as much as Muslims!

Peace, and may Allah be with you!

Answer 4

No matter your beliefs you should always treat and love your family with respect by simply treating them how you would like to be treated. It is useless for either of you to instill new/different beliefs on one another. You have a freewill choice to live your life how you want and no one can alter your path for you. In the end no one is wrong for their beliefs. No one religion is better than another and we will all struggle with or without the faith we have. It's just easier to live life in truth but not everybody is required to do that to live. We are all here for each other and our interactions help make us who we are. Your truth works for you therefore you live by it. You all need to understand that.

When you love someone, you expect the BEST of them, but you see, if you 'expect' something, you're putting restrictions on them. All you are asked to do, by Universal Law, is to SEE the best in them, because if you see it and you acknowledge it, then of course it shall flower forth from them... especially within that presence you give them... that love and encouragement.

Answer 5

Light has no argument with light. If you are right in your decision then what is the problem. If you are in truth, and it is upsetting someone, then either you are deceived or they are. Truth has no argument with truth. It is only darkness that has a difference with light, and lies that have an argument with TRUTH. I would keep seeking until there is agreement in the camp or change camps. If the argument continues when you are elsewhere then it could be the doctern that is wrong.

Answer 6

As an African American Muslim myself I understand your feelings. fortunately for me my family has been supportive. I would ask them to respect your religious views and if they will there is nothing you can do about it but know that God is the best knower of the hearts of people. peace

Answer 7

be strong with your faith you have done a great thing and there's always consiquences to great things!!!! your family will eventually get over it. just make sure you follow what allah tells us about family and how good we must treat them no matter what they do to you. Prophet muhammed was hated by his entire family friends and neighbors and they even tried to kill him many times. what happened later on? they saw the change in him and they loved it and finally converted to muslims.
allah wants you to be good to people no matter how bad they treat you especially blood relatives. it's called in arabic ( selat al rahem ) which means womb relation.

stand strong sister and best wishes!!!!!

Answer 8

I say to know why ~you~ believe what you do and know how to defend your faith. If they will not love you for you and require you to be what they want you to be in order to love you, you don't need that type of love.

BTW, just because something grows really fast doesn't mean that it is good.

Answer 9

I feel sad for you. My family is really important to me and I would feel crushed if they would do that to me. tell your family you love them but its up to you to choose your religion. they should understand right? I mean they are your family. I have older friends who feel that way too, but you'll get through it. just be the good person you are and they will see how Muslims really act.

Answer 10

Hope you are happy with your choice. family members will be just what they are, family members. they love you and think that if you are in the wrong they have to help you. Don't worry as long as you show them love still.