Parents, how do YOU get YOUR kids to pitch in around the house?

Question

Okay other than threatening to punish what are some things you do to get your kids to help? My kids are; 6, 9 & 11. I have tried taking things from them and grounding them but it hasn't worked. When my husband gets involved, he gets frustrated and gives in. I never do give in and I am always the 'bad' one. Sometimes it gets pretty old. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

keep it all positive
write a chart listing all the jobs you would like them to help with...
to start, tell them THEY have to pick the jobs THEY want to do
6 year old... picks 3 jobs
9 year old... picks 5 jobs
11 year old... picks 7 jobs

keep the task short and simple and failure proof... explain the task well and make it so achievable

make a big deal about how great a job they did and how importnat it was for the house and family that they also helped

after doign this for 3 consecutive weeks successfully increase the work load minimally so they cant really notice... but it shouldnt be a problem as they are now into the habit

they hsould have a few personal tasks as well which they have to do every day but also family tasks

if they complain about a job then explain that they picked that particular job so they are responsible for it... tell them that they can pick something different the next week

remember that they will not do things perfect as we do but you have to accept it... unless it is obvious that they did not clean something on purpose

you will have to push yourself to be firm with this if it is to work

Answer 2

Don't nag them anym. It isn't working.
Write up a list of chores that need to be done, daily, weekly, monthly etc. Get real organized. Then write down next to each one what it's worth in real money. If it's washing the dishes, then that can be worth $2.50, or whatever. Next list the chores you expect each kid to do every day. Make up a roster. Here's the catch: If you have to ask the kid to do what's on their roster, then they don't get the wage for the tasks. They have to do it all on their own in order to qualify for the money reward.
And if they don't start doing the chores at all, then tell them this: I will strip your world. And mean it. Take their things away, one at a time, until they have nothing left. They will figure it out, especially when you also stop washing their clothes.
This is not cruel. It is kind, because you are preparing your children to live and survive in the real world. If you stick with this, it will work, and your kids will learn how to work to earn money.

Answer 3

I'm confident that if I nonetheless lived with my mom and dad, I could be doing the identical factor I've been doing whilst I first got here to reside with them: placed the blank dishes away, preserve my room blank, take out the trash whilst it is complete, and ensure the catbox is blank. That's all I was once ever requested to do at my dad and stepmom's condo. So should you imply "pitching in" as in paying hire or stuff like that, then sure, they could nonetheless allow me reside there, they could nonetheless purchase me requirements (garments, lady stuff). But in the event that they did, I normally would not have moved out and acquired a task. There's no experience of accountability if mom and dad do just the whole lot for you.

Answer 4

I give my kids tokens for each job they do and at the end of the week they can use them for a minimum of 30 minutes video game time or they can cash them in for a few dollars.
i make small jobs like trash, cat box, feeding animals, things like that are worth 2 tokens. Bigger jobs are worth 5 tokens. You can figure out the game time amount they are worth or money worth for the age of your children.
My kids love doing this. also on Saturday, if their room is nice and clean, they get to pick a prize or treat at the store.
This is the first time i have gotten them to do their chores. I also took away TV privileges until their jobs are done.
I have 5 around the same age as yours.
Hope this helps give you some ideas.

Answer 5

When they run out of clean clothes and their friends stop coming around because they can't stand the smell they will learn to do their own laundry. Don't let them do ANYTHING. No TV, DVD, Phone, Video games AT ALL. They need to learn what being an adult is like. It is an on-going process and not something that happens when they wake up on their 18th birthday. Tell them that since you are so busy taking care of everything for them there will be no vacations either, and stick to it. Right are earned, not given, and they can be taken away and they need to learn that.

Answer 6

I have a five kids ages 12,9,7 ,5 and almost 8 mths. What i do is tell them each job you do I'll give you a few dollars or do something special and it usally works but I still get a hard time with my 12 and 7 yr old . so i just take what they really like away. when they start helping give it back. I hope this helps towards your question.

Answer 7

Depends on what you watnt them to pitch in with? I mean cleaning their own room is not pitching in, it's their duty. When my daughter did not clean her room, and refused to when she was 2, i threw them away, we haven't had the problem since. As far as other stuff... she wants to do it. she asks if she can wash the car or the bathroom for like 5 bucks.. SURE go ahead but she has to do it right. I can come home from work and she'd done the whole kitchen ..... She's NINE.... good girl! Well mainly because I yelled at her and told her that she's too old not to be cleaning up her own mess in the kitchen and it's not that dificult to put her dishes in the dishwasher, i guess after doing that she took it upon herself to wipe the counters down, as she heard me rant to her dad about cleaning the "whole" kitchen... HAHAHAHAHA... I am NOT the maid!

Answer 8

Just say, if you keep pitching in around the house when i ask, we will have more time to go do fun things, such as go out for icecream or see a movie.
Them helping out will result in you having more free time.
Try rewarding them if they do their jobs rather than to punish them if they do not do their jobs.

Answer 9

Well allowance is a good way and it also gives them a sense of what they will have to do in life. It really works. My brother in law and sister in law wouldn't do ANY THING before. Now they look for other things to do to earn extra money lol.

Answer 10

set up a allowance like 5.00 for doing laundry a week something like that