Guys help me understand what he really means?

Question

I lived w/my ex for over a year.we broke up 2 months and2 weeks ago.he says he still loves me but just wants to be single.there are times where he shows me he still loves me and is so sweet and then others when he is so cold.he's had lil 1 nite stands but not me.he only comes around when he needs me in some way or a few times a week just to check up on me(make sure i havent moved on)I know the best thing is let him go but how? and how can I tell if he really just needs some space and wait for him?

Answer 1

it sounds like the best thing to do is let him go but believe me i no its not always that simple so you have to ask yourself do you really love him if no then problem solved but if yes and you really do love him then i don't think you can stop waiting for him but give it time and you will realize if after a few more weeks hes still not ready to commit then you have to ask yourself is it worth it as to me it sounds like he has you wrapped round his finger but anyway best of luck
from tom 13

Answer 2

I think it's clear from what you've said that he isn't certain what he wants, either. Your dedication to him is admirable, but he doesn't have the same dedication to you. If he truly loves you, he would not be running around having one-night stands and such. It seems like you are a "safe zone" for him. He knows you'll always be there to catch him when he screws up or a different relationship doesn't work out. That isn't what lovers are for, that's what friends are for. I suggest you accept your losses and turn him away the next time he comes around. It's time for him to stand on his own two feet. He's had plenty of time to prove he's serious. He isn't. Let him go and move on. Someone so sweet as to be so forgiving of a man like this deserves someone better - and I'm certain you'll find Mr. Right eventually. Sometimes the best way to do it is to just stop looking. Fate has a way of making things work out.

Answer 3

There is a difference when a man wants his "space" and when he is just being a playa. Don't be fooled. It sounds like he's keeping you in his pocket by playing with your emotions. He knows you love him and that you are willing to "settle" for this type of relationship.

But what about you? Don't you want to be in ln a relationship that's equal? Where you love someone and thaey love you back? Life is tough enough without all these games. Think about yourself for a moment. If he wants some space then give it to him. But don't be a fool and put your happiness on hold. Find someone that will treat you the way you want to be treated.

"nuff said"

Answer 4

Honey your wasting your time with him. He is just playing you. Of course he wants to move on, but he doesn't wants you to forget him. You need to show him you have self respect and pride in yourself. Don't ever let any guy use you like that only when they want something or if they are lonely. You need to find a better guy one that will cherish you and respect you for who you are (not a user) I guarantee you once you put a stop to this you will feel much better, You may be hurt for a while but don't you rather be hurt in that way in forgetting him then him always using you and you can't forget him? He will regret it in the long run once he realizes he lost a good girl. To late for him right? Best if luck but I truly hope you end it with him!

Answer 5

Not all men are like this. I, for one undoubtedly would not do this to any individual. This appears to be a giant natural concern within the American tradition. That "Girls Gone Wild" mentality has given boys the impact that ALL ladies only a few beverages clear of beginning themselves as much as any individual who is within the field. It's very unlucky that those men (whom you have got been in touch with) do not look to fully grasp how impolite and flawed it's to contact anyone in that approach. I surprise how they would consider if men and women who they weren't taken with did that to them?

Answer 6

Well, I think that u should leave him alone because if he really loved u then he wouldn't be having 1 nite stands. Plus he might have AIDS from all those women that he had sex with. So I don't think u want that. But u should really let him go.

Answer 7

Don't wait for him. Do your own thing for awhile. Hang out with your girls. I know it hurts, we've all been there and it is soooo hard to just not think about it. Your friends should be keeping you busy. Once you've had a little time to yourself and he's had time to himself, maybe you two can try again. But don't play games, I know this from experience, it just makes things worse.

Answer 8

He's dumped you and he's sleeping with other girls...when he said he needed space he meant he wanted to sleep with other woman. If you move on he might realize he wants you but by than it'll b to late. He only visits if he wants something and to make sure you have no new bf... Girl you deserve better....he's playing he's looking and he's doing others....U go get yourself a nice guy unattached single wants you only guy and keep him.

Answer 9

He wants to have his cake and eat it too. Hes hoping to have fun with all these other women and when he hits a dry spell he will come to you. He also doesnt want you to hook up so he keeps on checking in with you. He's a mess. Let him go and tell him to stop bothering you.

Answer 10

He really loves you. Just wait for him. It sounds like true love. He just wants to make sure that, you're the one. So, while he's off bangin' other broads...you can sit there and wait like the dullard he took you for.

hope that helps.

If that doesn't work...a couple chugs of bleach or ammonia will do you good.