I'm in a relationship with a girl I fell for really hard.I truly believe we are great together and she is the strongest person I've ever met.I think the major problem is that she is involved in a huge custody fight with the father of her son and she has been burned so many times by other guys that she won't let herself go and enjoy being with me.Last night she called and told me she wants to end it after 3 months of being together because she can't handle the stress of what's going on in her life combined with the problems of starting a new relationship.I've done all I can do to help her realize how I feel and the lengths I will go to in order to have her in my life.She's very, very depressed right now and I want to help her out but when I offer to do something for her she pushes me away.I'm sure she likes being with me but she just won't let herself enjoy it.There's so much more here but I'm outta room please e-mail me if you need more info.Losing her over this would make me sick.
2006-08-08 07:43:05 · 10 answers · asked by Big Thinker 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It sounds to me like she really just needs some space...let her know that you are there for her, but give her some room...She's frazzled, stressed, and burnt out...keep in touch with her, but as much as it kills you, let her work through it on her own...if she finds that she needs you after all, you will be there...but she's pushing you away for a reason and you should respect that.
2006-08-08 07:49:31 · answer #1 · answered by jillymack06 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you sound like a true Man.. u know what u want, and ur not willing to let it go. you feel the need to fight for it.... if u know it's good, and right, and u can be Positive together, u Want to fight for it.
it may be discouraging, but u need to Help her break that barrier down. but she has to allow that to happen....it's not going to be done by force, or because You think it's better..she has to learn, on her own, that it Will and Can be better with you. sit down, and ask her what she needs, and wants, and expects in her life. then let her know what you expect from urself, as someone in her life, and what u want from her, as a girlfriend, and what u want to work for in ur relationship. tell her u want to build up that trust, and u know it's going to take time, and ur willing to wait until she's ready. that's all u can do, is let her know u truly love her and want what's BEST for her, even if it means u have to let her go. she needs to find something strong enough to lean on, and is scared. if u truly feel u can be that rock for her, do all u can to let her know u are there for her, and find out from her what she needs u to do. pushing her to do something in her vulnerable state is very dangerous, because she will resent u, even if u are trying to help her! get family and friends involved, so she sees that u care more for her than just as a lover. good luck, this seems like a really hard situation..but i am inspired and impressed by ur love for her... hold on to it, and be a great support for her.. if she can see it, and accept it, it can be a wonderful solution for u both.
2006-08-08 14:52:34 · answer #2 · answered by sasmallworld 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ive been in her situation.... If you really care then be there for her.... Without pressuring her into a relationship... If you are really meant to be together she will see that when her life calms down. But if your in a rush rush i wanna be with you mode...she will back off completely! You have to understand what shes going through right now. And she probably doesnt need anyone to add to the drama.....
2006-08-08 14:48:18 · answer #3 · answered by Roxx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would give her the time that she needs. She probably feels like she has nothing to give to you right now. She knows that you care. Try being there for her as a friend at this point in time. It does seem like she's going through a lot right now. I know it sucks right now, but be patient and gentle. When things blow over she will know that you are someone who truely cares and believe me, she will remember that. I'm sorry that it sucks for you right now. But be patient. lol
2006-08-08 14:54:20 · answer #4 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
really, all you can do right now is give her moral support and let her know u will be their for her anytime day or night . then after the custody is settled, then start ur relationship over, fresh
2006-08-08 14:48:47 · answer #5 · answered by Mark 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you cant let some girl like this slip a way you have to say i love you im not like those other guys and i would do any thing to show you that i love you. just be like i dont wanna leave you and stay with her through the good and bad.
2006-08-08 14:52:00 · answer #6 · answered by derek g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
trust me just be there for her. tell her u will wait for her and keep telling her u love her. as a woman who know how this feels i know that there is nothing u can do for her but just hug her when she cries and offer her ur love. that what my guy did for me and i am improving alot now i am not perfect but only time helps someone really.
2006-08-08 14:48:55 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give her the space and time she needs right now.
Maybe when the court battles are over,she will find the strength to be in a relationship.
Just tell her you will be there....
2006-08-08 14:47:36 · answer #8 · answered by MaryBeth 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
give her time let things settle!then if shes ready go for it!
2006-08-08 14:48:13 · answer #9 · answered by shorty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
encourage and help her with a smlie... always remain with her..
2006-08-08 14:47:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋