Money saving tips--we need to do this a.c.a.p. (as cheap as possible)!?

Question

My boyfriend and I (I won't call him my fiance until I get the ring, which means waiting another couple weeks) are having a baby in February. If all goes well I hope to lose most of the weight by the end of Spring and we're aiming for a mid/late summer wedding. With the baby, and us deciding I'm going to stay at home for the first year or so we really need to save money, but we're not putting the wedding off forever to save. Aside from my dress, which is my mother's old wedding dress that I'm having a few alterations done to (wedding present from another friend), we need to cut back on the costs of everything! Our wedding party said they'd each cover their own tux/dress, but we each have so many family members, and friends we don't want to leave out, that we're looking at 150+ guests. We want to find a scenic outdoor place for the wedding, so that should be pretty inexpensive, but what else can we do to save money? I'm mostly concerned about the reception...please help!

I just got off the phone with my cousin who got married last year. She went overboard on spending for decorations and things and wound up having to cut back on things for the reception. All in all we had 175 at her wedding, the food was buffet style, and everything was wonderful. She only spent about 1000 on renting the hall, getting the food plus the cake.

I wish everyone didn't think everything at a wedding was about food and drinking. My friends and family don't drink, or barely drink, and Jacob's are the same way. There will not be an open bar, if someone wants one or two drinks, they'll buy it themselves, because we're not drinking people. Bringing a dish is something we might consider, but I'm going to keep looking at food from local restaurants who will do a buffet for us like my cousin's. Please don't tell me that I CAN'T do this for under $8000, seeing as my budget is a fourth of that, and so far our projected costs are only $600 over that.

The guests won't care about the flowers? What about if I care about the flowers? I'm not going to spend $5 on flowers for an entire wedding just so we can have surf & turf for dinner. Okay, I know how to go about getting some cheaper flowers, because there college I graduated from is an Ag. school, and their greenhouse will give me a major discount, that I hadn't considered.

A DJ for 4 hours is going to cost me $200, I thought that was pretty cheap, but I haven't compared rates yet, so I might just go with a DJ instead of our own CDs, that way I don't have to worry about technical problems all day.

I know that ettiquette wise we are supposed to cover things, but our friends from college (the wedding party of 4) said they wanted to cover it, and everything's under $100 per person anyway, so they said consider it a gift from them.

We may be doing an outdoor wedding but are not planning on an outdoor reception-or will at least find a public place with a pavillion & tables.

Answer 1

From what I recall, etiquette says the "bare minimum" required at a reception is cake and punch. (Regional cultural expectations may be different - I've heard that New England weddings are veritable bacchanalia - but expectations are not etiquette.) If you schedule your wedding for 2:30 pm, that's late enough in the afternoon that folks will want to have eaten lunch before they go, and early enough in the day that folks will be able to attend, mingle, and then go their own ways for dinner.

However, if you go this route, then *definitely* make a note of it on the invitations. Instead of saying "reception to follow", say "cake & punch to follow". That way, people will immediately know what to expect, and will be able to plan accordingly. This is ESPECIALLY important if you have anyone on your guest list with blood sugar problems (diabetes, hypoglycemia, etc.).

I was going to suggest what to do if anyone complains, but honestly anyone who complains probably shouldn't be invited. They're supposed to be coming for the *wedding*, not the free food afterward.

Oh, and I'd still recommend trimming your guest list. If you do a simple cake and punch reception, you'll probably want to go ahead and spring for a professional-looking cake so it doesn't seem so obvious that you're trying to do this on the cheap. Moreover, it may be really hard to find an outdoor venue that can comfortably SEAT 150 people (you did remember to consider seating and shade capacity when looking for your venue, right? Otherwise you're renting chairs and pavilions, which cranks the price right back up).

Answer 2

Unless you can depend on the weather cooperating, sometimes an outdoor wedding is costlier. I don't know where you live.

As far as the reception, as long as you have a place for people to get out of the sun, you can do just about anything you want. You are not going to have alot of time with a baby, so you need to do as mush as you can get done, now, if you plan on table decorations & favors, that sort of thing.

Nothing wrong either with a 'picnic' or potluck reception. What you could do is supply the burgers, hot dogs & vegeburgers, buns, condiments Just make sure you get an idea of what everyone is bringing so you don't have 15 different kinds of baked beans & nothing else. Have a small wedding cake & let others contribute to the dessert as well.

Don't ask for this in lieu of a gift. Under the circumstances, I should think that family & friends would feel good that they contributed to your wedding in such a helpful way & they can show off they're cooking ability as well.

Record music and have someone play the CD's for you. I know one couple who recorded their music on a VHS tape (no I don't understand how) and had 6 hrs.of their own music, non-stop.

Good luck! And take care of yourself.

Answer 3

1. Your've having the baby in February and want to lose it by May? Think again. Become realistic and don't push yourself too hard. You're going to have to deal with a LOT of changes, and you have a c-section you won't be up and moving in an exercise fashion for about a month.

2. Find a park. Usually they require little or no payment, and you can have it in a gazebo. Have a BBQ and have the bridal party bring side dishes.

3. Make your own cake. It can look REALLY amazing if you just make it yourself. Go to a cake decorating class if you want to.

4. For photographs, ask a friend or two to take pictures for you. Don't use the disposable cameras because of the people I've spoken with who used them, of the 100+ pictures taken, only 11 or so will be usable.

5. Grow your own flowers, buy wholesale, or buy fake. Hobby Lobby and Michaels run periodic sales on fake flowers.

6. Ask your guests to bring their own lawn chairs. No shame in that at all!

7. Make your own invitation. It will take time, but it can be done easily.

Answer 4

The easiest way to cut costs is to cut the number of people you're having to entertain. Your reception is around 50% of the total cost of the wedding, so the bulk of your $$ goes there. DON'T do pot luck, it's tacky. You can save $$ by having an afternoon reception, maybe just do cake and punch, rather than a full sit down meal. Or do hor'duerves rather than a meal, or cook the food yourself (or have friends cook it). Remember the more things you can do yourself, rather than pay someone else to do, will save you money. You can buy flowers from Costco and assemble your own bouquets, corsages, centerpieces, etc. I found a good article at Martha Stewart Weddings http://www.marthastewart.com/page.jhtml?type=learn-cat&id=cat247&rsc=topnav about how to save $$ on a wedding, but can't find it on the site now, I'm sure it's still there, just dig around until you find it. The Knot http://www.theknot.com/ and Wedding Channel http://weddingchannel.com/ probably also have articles on $$ saving ideas as well. You're also on the right track by looking for an outdoor location, if there's a pretty public park around, go for it!! Just check and see how much renting tables/chairs, etc will be, and if the company sets them up. Again, you can probably save some dough having the guys do set up of the heavy stuff.

BTW, etiquette wise, your wedding party is supposed to cover the cost of their attire.

Best of luck to you!!! Congratulations!

Answer 5

I can tell you that I totally relate. If you would like ideas I am more than willing to email them to you. I'm getting married this Sept. Despite what some people will tell you, you DO NOT have to go out of the way to provide food and drinks for your guests. They are coming to celebrate your wedding NOT for free dinner.And there is no reason why you can't have no alcohol at your reception either. If you have your wedding in the early afternoon, you can get away w/ just a cake and punch reception. Check this site out, it's great..http://www.ultimatewedding.com/articles/get.php?action=getarticle&articleid=48
also, another way to save, is to make your own invitations. There are many sets that you can get, check out Michaels, Walmart, JoAnn Fabrics. They sell kits for $20-$25 with everything included, you just need a printer. They give you a site to pick out your wording, font, color ink etc. Also, making your bouquets is another way, try using fresh or silk flowers and wrapping the ends together w/ a ribbon and then a bow.
I am getting married in 3 weeks, and I think total only spent $2000 on everything. Also, if you didn't know..but the people you have in the wedding party, they pay for their own items, dress, tux shoes etc. And if you are wanting to give them gifts, you can always do a necklace that they will wear in the ceremony and guys you can give $$ of their tux rental. I am more than willing to share my ideas and give you pictures and stuff. Congrats on the wedding and baby :)

Answer 6

I got married for ::drumroll:: $140.00 - that's it! The first thing you need to do is laugh and plan a wedding that is more fun than formal. If you keep fun in mind you can get away with some pretty crazy things. Large japanese lanterns make beautiful and elegant decorations for pennies. Definatly go to Michael's (or your local large craft store) to start with ideas. If the flowers are a big deal with you try to get just a few and make then very special. For instance my wedding flowers cost $16.78 for two gorgeous dozen roses bouquets from the grocery store. My bridal party and I arranged them - everyone got a flower or butineer... and the rest went to my bridal buoquet which I wrapped in the pretty pink tissue paper it came in and then tied it with some leftover 1-in ribbon I saved from altering my dress a few nights before. Think small - think special. Oh! and the ceapest part of the wedding - the site was free and amazing - it was a pond and tea house on a college campus - no charge

Answer 7

Save money by cutting the Beer...have a alcohol free event- that will save a TON of money!

I have been playing the change game. Instead of using my debt card- I pay with cash. When ever I get pocket change back from breaking a bill- I put that in a jar. When the jar gets full, I empty it and put it in the bank. $300 in just a couple of months.

Do a morning wedding, instead of a huge reception think about service a brunch. Bagels, coffee, etc.- that can save some cash too. I hope this helps

Answer 8

What kind of a wedding do you want?? With over 150 guests, if you want to treat them right, it's going to be difficult to do for under $8000 for the food and drinks alone. That's if you want them to enjoy themselves and not just think, 'great, another wedding with crappy food and no wine'.

If you are unwilling to cut the guest list, you can cut back on decorations, flowers, centerpieces, etc. But again, I strongly recommend not cutting back on food or drink. As a guest, there's nothing worse than being obligated to go to a wedding and getting there and having bad food and no wine (or it costs $7 a glass). Treat your guests right and they will appreciate it. They won't care about the flowers, they won't care about cotton vs. linen tablecloths, they won't care about the pattern on the china, but they will care about if you respected them or not.

Respecting them is not having a BBQ, or a potluck, or costco veggie platters. It's treating them like guests who took time out of their lives to witness your marriage.

The thing is, a big wedding is optional. If you can't afford it, then you shouldn't do it. Instead invite 10 people on each side and have something intimate and small and use the rest of your money on a honeymoon without the baby.

Good luck to you.

Answer 9

Cut on the guest list. Feeding and provding drinks for 150 people will cost you ate least 3000 assuming that ou do a BBQ. Forget about catering.

Dear asker, you are having a baby and when the diaper/formula bill come you will see that there will be not a lot left for a wedding, specially since you will not be working.

My suggestion to you is to do it now, before the baby comes. YOu will have more money and time available.

Congratulations and good luck

Answer 10

Since you jumped the gun and are going to have the baby before the wedding, you should not be having a traditional wedding, so that will keep the costs way down. You should only have something conservative for immediate family and friends, so that keeps the numbers way down. You shouldn't be wearing a traditional wedding dress, so you can just pick up a nice dress or suit cheaply. People don't care much what they eat, they just want a chance to visit. Happy Wedding! Happy baby!