I need to move on with my life. My ex-boyfriend cheated on me and now has a child. As much as he says he loves me and is sorry, my decision is to end the relationship because other than that I don't feel he really respects and cares for me and that is something I need from a serious relationship. He still has contact with her and to be honest I think they have a secret relationship. I still love him but will not go back
2006-08-08 00:12:13 · 13 answers · asked by shynshai 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Good for you! Don't go back........though it is hard on the heart when you still love that person. However, in the long run you don't need all that added drama in a relationship. He has behaved selfishly by going outside of your relationship and created a fourth innocent person. You are more deserving than that, you need a man that will love and value you for all that you are worth. Your intuition is speaking clearly, most guys do continue to have a sleep over with the baby's mother.
Don't turn back to misery, move forward into happiness. You are what matters and you won't find it with him. He has to juggle his life to accommodate the baby's needs along with the nagging girlfriend. You don't need extra drama nor chaos in your life.
I suggest you get plenty of rest, workout, eat healthy and do get some counseling. This experience of loving, and the letting go is hard on the heart and mind. Sometimes it takes a year, but in the long run you will be a stronger person.
Good luck!
2006-08-08 00:30:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree that you need to move on with your life...without him. even if you still love him, a relationship is more about trust than it is about love. he has broken your trust a great deal, if i may say. and a mistake like that--it just isnt worth having him back. he has a responsibility already to the child and especially to the mother of his child. and whatever he says, its not going to change that a child is there.
i agree that he doesnt love, respect, and care about you not one bit. just the fact that he impregnated another girl while you two are together is more than enough pain to bear.
the best thing you can do right now is to find it in your heart to forgive him for what he has done....even if he doesn't mean his "sorries"..it doesnt matter. what matters is that you learn to forgive him because this is the first step to healing. in very painful situations, sometimes we try to deny that someone has really done something to us. but as hard as it may be, it is best if you accept the truth because the truth will set you free. this is your first step and the most essential. you cannot move on if you have not forgiven someone because if you havent forgiven, that will always come to haunt your mind and your memory as long as you dont give it away.
then you can confide in a bestfriend (preferably the same gender as you. because a guy might take advantage of the situation and the weakness you are in and this is not the right path to recovery). go out with your girl friends and enjoy yourself again. i know this is hard, but it isn't impossible to do. and yes...time does heal all emotional wounds. and only God can completely heal your broken heart---but only if you give HIM all the pieces. do it.
2006-08-08 00:28:03 · answer #2 · answered by Jacqueline 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh God, just run away! When a child is in the game everything changes- he will always have a special relationship with this other woman because they have a child together. Even if she didn't got pregnant, he's not worth of your attention because he cheated on you. I'm not just talking r u b b i s h, because I recently had a nasty break-up (I cancelled up my wedding) and I feel terrible, but with time it will go away. There are a lot of good single men out there - I'm sure you will find someone who will love you... Trust me.
2006-08-08 00:28:33 · answer #3 · answered by charlie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Partners come and partners go. That's the way it is in dating. It hurts to let someone go but then you cant have someone who does not want to be with you for ever.
You will have to start a new relationship with someone else. That would draw your attention away from your ex. You will find new love and then time will start to play tricks on old memories.
2006-08-08 00:23:08 · answer #4 · answered by Bachelor boy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do need to move on. Time will heal this, but it doesn't mean there won't be scars. You deserve someone who is willing to respect you and care for you. So move on! You'll be okay! Good luck!
2006-08-08 00:20:19 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the whole situation is non ending especially w/ a child and if u can't handle it now what makes u will in the future? U know what u can "put up w/" ur the deciding factor!
2006-08-08 00:20:37 · answer #6 · answered by ~Niecee~ âË» âË» ♂ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree with most of these other answers, you need to move on, start over, move if need be, change in your routines might help. go to a gym , meet new people, that sort of thing. Good luck it will get better with time.
2006-08-08 00:23:13 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont go back. move on with your life. dont put yourself in a position to be hurt again. u deserve to be loved and respected. he made his choice and now u need to make urs.
2006-08-08 00:17:28 · answer #8 · answered by blackqueen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont go back to him if he cheated on you once he'll do it again, i know its hard to get over someone u liked very much, but u should not waste anymore time on a cheater.
2006-08-08 00:23:23 · answer #9 · answered by its all about me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u fool move on. Ur sad if u still saying you love him
2006-08-08 00:17:36 · answer #10 · answered by Emiliana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋