At what age should a brother and sister stop bathing together?

Question

I am sure I will get some snide remarks... so my eyes are already rolling in response, but that aside... just wondering at what age should I stop my kids from bathing together? The boy just turned 5 and the girl is 2. Thanks for the imput.

I am surprised at the number of responses that said I should never let them take a bath together.

Let me attempt to explain. I want for my son and daughter to not have any sexual hang ups. I don't want them to think that being naked is always a sexual thing. I want them to understand that each sex has his or her own private parts. Private means that those parts belong to that person and should only be touched by that person - I want them to be comfortable in their skin and now ashamed of what God has given them, after all isn't that what God wanted for us to begin with?

Personally, I think that those of you who think they should never take a bath together are a little off. It two babies in a tub together naked make you feel uncomfortable maybe it is "you" that has the problem.

I am proud of how I raise my two and even prouder of the fact that I was able to let go of all the sexual junk I was fed as a child and raise mine junk free.

One more thing - I am also proud of the fact that my son knows the correct name for his body parts and won't be walking around calling it a peepee. My two year old also knows hers. This was not easy for me because I was not use to using those words, but in teaching my own children I have also taught myself and we all have more confidence for it.

I have been weening them from taking bath time together, but I think now is the right time to give my boy some more privacy - thank you all for your comments, the good and the bad.

Very tough to pick a fav. Some of you touched me with your responses and sensitivity while others shocked me with their response - I guess that is what makes live so interesting - we all have different views - it would be boring if we all lived the same. Thanks people.

Answer 1

As a strict conservative church going Lutheran mother of four I gotta say that they'll pretty much tell you when they're too old for it! Here are some possible signs that it's time to stop.

1. He or she becomes concerned with the physical differences between them and wants to touch the others privates--this is a great opportunity to discuss good touch and bad touch.

2. He starts to become shy about undressing in front of Mom or her.

My daughter at 4 tried to tell the girls in the neighborhood that her brother 5 1/2 had different privates than them and they all just laughed at her for saying such ridiculous things! These girls were all older than her by 1-2 years and have no close male siblings. Boy are they in for a shock! I took this as an indication that it was time to start bathing separately. I didn't do it suddenly I just stopped bathing them together most of the time, kind of weening them slowly telling them they were getting kind of old to bathe with someone.

My neighbor lets her 10 year old son and 4 year old daughter bathe together but I think he wears his swimsuit! They are very normal children. Not sexual or anything.

I kind of think it's good that children do not automatically link nudity and sexuality it makes them a little more even keeled when it comes time for sex ed and stuff. People spend so much time sexualizing children it is no wonder that kids are so messed up now a days.

Besides you're saving water!

Good Luck!

Answer 2

1

Answer 3

I'm not reading the other posts but from the sound of your comments they weren't very responsive...

It's okay to bathe them together as long as a few things...

1) You are supervising to ensure that there isn't any grabbing. Not perverted grabbing but exploratory grabbing.

2) They understand that if anybody touches their privates, including each other, they are to tell mommy right away.

They live in the same house and at times don't have modesty... they will see each other naked every once and a while. They shouldn't be ashamed of their own bodies of other's bodies. On that same note, they should understand that there are certain times when it is okay to be naked in front of other people and times when it isn't okay. Like in the bath, it's okay to be naked. When you are... playing video games, it's not okay. You know what I mean?

My son has a half sister and they bathed together until she pulled on his penis. That was the end of bath time for the two of them... I think he was 5 or 6 and she was 2 or 3.

Answer 4

My son is 7, daughter 4. My son developed a sense of modesty around 5 1/2 or 6 years-old. He is very private now, and does not change in front of sis. I only bathed them together until he seemed even SLIGHTLY uneasy about it, at which time, I made no statements, didn't embarrass anyone, and when they asked what we were doing, I just said, "we're going to start taking turns in the bathroom so everyone has privacy"
Based on my experience, I think you are right at the time when it's appropriate to separate their bath time, and if you haven't already, teach him where his "private" areas are, and when it's appropriate for others to be in the room while he bathes. I really encourage the modesty, because I feel like it protects my kids.
I hope this helps.

Answer 5

I grew up as the only son with 4 sisters in an "open" house - we weren't overly concerned with clothing and closing doors and the whole "privacy" thing. We stopped taking baths together when we got too big to fit into the bathtub together. Even today (I'm now 50), when we go to my older sister's house to use her swimming pool, its always swimsuit-optional. We all grew up very normal, except we didn't have half of the questions that I see being asked here - we all knew what the other gender looked like, and what the parts were to be used for. Family nudity, including bathing together, can be a very healthy thing. I would say, let your children tell you when they are ready to stop. Whenever one or the other is uncomfortable with it, don't do it. Thank you for trying to raise mentally healthy children.

Answer 6

10

Answer 7

I just don't see what the hangup is? Every one seems to think there is something wrong with young siblings taking a bath together. A) They are children!!! They aren't going to do the sick things the adults are afraid of, and B) You are supervising aren't you? Therefore, I say, save money on water - let them be. They are only 5 & 2!!! If they were 15 and 12 I would say worry - for now, you and they both should enjoy their innocent childhood.

But to answer your question, I would say 6 or 7.

Answer 8

I think it should be 4 years I have 4 kids and 2 boys and 2 girls I stopped letting the opposite sex bath at 4. By law it is considered child pornography at the age of 4. example: taking naked pics or letting them run around outside in just undies or pampers. Also long term memory starts at the age of 4.

Answer 9

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Answer 10

I WOULD SAY THEY SHOULD NEVER BATHE TOGETHER. I AM NOT JUDGING YOU BUT I HAVE 3 YEAR OLD AND 1 YEAR OLD DAUGHTERS AND THEY HAVE NEVER TAKEN A BATH TOGETHER NOR DO I BATHE THEM WITH ME. I HAVE ALWAYS SAID THE BATH TIME IS A PERSONAL TIME TO BE ALONE
I WAS BATHED WITH MY SISTER UNTIL I WAS OLD ENOUGH TO BATHE MYSELF AND WE ARE 13 MONTHS APART AND I HATED IT SO SINCE THEN I REFUSE TO BATHE WITH ANYONE I GIVE THE SAME RESPECT TO MY KIDS TO HELP THEM UNDERSTAND THAT IT IS A PERSONAL ALONE TIME FOR 1 PERSON TO ENJOY ALONE
PLUS 5 IS WAY TO OLD TO BE BATHING WITH ANOTHER CHILD ESPECIALLY A SISTER DUE TO THE FACT THAT HE IS NOTICING MORE AND SHOULD NOT BE SEEING THINGS OR ASKING QUESTIONS YET ABOUT THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THEM BESIDES YOU ARE A BOY AND SHE IS A GIRL BUT NOW YOU MUST HAVE TO GO INTO DETAIL AND EXPLAIN WHY HE WAS TOO OLD WHEN SHE WAS BORN SO TO ME YES YOU ARE WAY OVER DUE TO SET UP SEPARATE BATH TIMES