interested or not?

Question

we have this 7 year history of friendship/dating, but wasnt serious. he says he WAS in love with me but i broke his heart. (i know i did too, but i was scared so i bailed on him w/no explination) so now, 4 years later, were talkin again. but hes different...
1) he tells me that he wants to take things slowly, i need to be patient w/him
2) he tells me that he has his guard up but hes slowly lettin it down (in two weeks we will have been talking for 2 months) but im not seein much of a diff
3) he came to see me but told me that the 1st nite he was nervous and the rest of the weekend he wasnt very affectionate, yet he liked for me to be affectionate to him (we dont live in the same state anymore)
4) the week after he left he began to question who i was talkin to or being with... he would say "are u with a girl or a guy?"
5) sometimes we talk anywhere from 1 time to 5 times a day.... but not always long chats.


why does he act this way?

am i being too impatient with him?

i asked him why he wants to pursue this when he can have someone in his state (where im from) and he said "because we have a history".

Answer 1

Jeez lady, of course he's different. You dumped his sorry as* when he was in love with you, that's not easy to forget. Way to treat a guy! Stop just thinking of yourself.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

He acts that way becasue he does not trust you which translates to your relationship not working and him being insecure. Trust is creates love. He doesn't trust you. Of course, he wants you because your there. Kind of like a commodity. And, Yes your being to patient.

Why don't you explore other options and when you find someone who doesn't have so much freakin Drama and just wants to have fun. You can no longer talk to the Drama guy only becasue it will hurt your new relationship which can develop into something great. Life is too short go find a fun guy with a decent job.

Answer 4

I believe so. In some cases ppl just cant pick up where they left off that easy. Some ppl cant handle rejection, some understand it and can forgive and forget.{well, forgive anyway}, forgetting is the biggest problem. U obviously hurt him pretty bad and u may just have 2 except the fact that things can never be the same again. If u truly love each other then i wish u the best.

Answer 5

You left him before he has to protect hiself how is he to know that you will not do this again give him time,build up some trust you can not expect for him to act like nothing ever happened before most men will not even take into consideration taking you back after that. he must really love you,he wants you to initiate the affection cause he needs to see that he is not the only one that wants this. The ball is in your court now. AreYOU gonna PLAYor what?? GOoD luck!

Answer 6

You're trying to recover trust that you lost. No, you're not being too impatient, but it may not even be possible. Let him go, he'll find someone new that hasn't hurt him yet. He loves you, but he doesn't trust you. The two of you will need to decide to either make a clean break and walk away, or jump in with both feet. For both your sakes. Love hurts, but can't be cautious. Good luck!

Answer 7

I mean, think about it, your broke his heart. He obviously still has feelings for you, but part of him does not want to get hurt again. It hard enough to get hurt and move on to someone new, but it is a whole different thing to get hurt and then go back to the same person that hurt you. Right now he is forcing himself to overlook what happened to follow his heart, but you will never completely have him, because everytime he looks in your eyes, or hears your voice, he will remember the pain. I say, just let him go. Let him move on, you had your chance and you ruined it. So now you have to let him go find someone who will treat him right. I know that is harsh, but it is what it is.

Answer 8

It all boils down to his lack of trust, you did him, wrong, and he is expecting you to do it again.
It's going to take a lot longer than six weeks, for you to change his feelings. It's not his head thats talking, it's his heart, and that will take much longer to repair.
If you aren't up to a long time relationship with him, and it sounds like you are tiring of it already. Then it now, for both your sakes. Be friends if you can, but as to romantic relationships, search your heart.
Can you wait as long as it will take?

Answer 9

Well he is trying to take it slow, but if you hurt him that bad he will never warm up to u. He is hanging around just wanting sex.I have been heartbroken by the same lady 3 times but the last time i finally had enough and she tries to talk to me all the time and i can't stand to even look at her. But good luck

Answer 10

Trust is harder earned but easily distroyed, you can blame him for being sketchy. If you 2 really care bout eachother it will take a lot or time and work to make this happen.
Patients is a virtue