Sorry if you have answered this question, I just needed to ask again for more advice.
I am 28 years old. I met this girl, 23 year old, three months ago and have grown in love with her in time. I have invited her a couple of times to have some coffee or eat lunch on three ocassions, only the first time she accepted. We talked many times on the phone. After two times of having my invitation cancelled (she had accepted both times) I decided not to pursue and called her to wish her the best in life and good-bye, a week later she left me a message at work to call her back and so I did. She revealed to me she's been a widow for six months and was afraid of entering a relationship but she wanted to continue seeing me. I have not revealed my feelings for her but I think I need to before this goes forward and grow deeper that will hurt even more. Should I?
2006-08-07 12:27:50 · 4 answers · asked by scherzo_for_motorcycle_orchestra 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I wanted to add that I do not want to appear as if I'm taking advantage of her because that is not the case, but sometimes some people can perceive intentions that are not accurate.
Even though materialistic things are unimportant after such a hard loss, just as additional information she told me she had a house, car, everything everyone wants to begin a full life and begin a family. She lost everything when his family took it away. But I guess the loss that hurts the most is that you had everything you wanted for and you couldn't even begin it. I'm so sad when I think of it, which has been a lot in these last couple of days since she told me.
2006-08-07 12:28:13 · update #1
She had been married for a year and he died of cancer. He was 32 and she was 22 during their marriage.
2006-08-07 12:28:23 · update #2
Also for those who suggested I was falling in love because I felt sorry for her are just wrong, it was the little details like our talks and her smile, that kind of thing.
2006-08-07 12:29:47 · update #3
im 33 and a widow. things with his family were not pleasant after he died and they havernt even seen our kids in 5 years since he died. the loss is hard enough but if his family is bad its a hundred times worse. shes probably very scared of antything right now. dont tell her tyou love her. let her feel comfortable with you as a friend and things will grow from there. she will love you for the support without the pressure if you really want a long term relationship with her. good luck
2006-08-07 12:35:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO, not a good time to tell her about such a strong emotion. She is still emotionally in pain from the loss of her husband. Just make sure she knows you are there for her, that type thing. The love stuff would be bad timing.
2006-08-07 19:35:32 · answer #2 · answered by Kit Kat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No not yet, Her mental state is still mixed as to a relationship. She can use just a good friend at this point and maybe later on it will grow into more but at this point just be a friend
2006-08-07 19:35:23 · answer #3 · answered by floridakid 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should tell her to get your giult and bad feeling out of your head.
2006-08-07 19:33:30 · answer #4 · answered by Toocool585 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋