do you feel the same are we to blame??

Question

i am watching the children play in my area and some are good while some are just bold and violent i see there parents let them do what they want and hurt other kids and wondering what there going to be like when they grow up they back answer and shout i really feel sorry for them so is it us as parents that are to blame for all the thugs and bad people out there after all they are some ones son or daughter??

Answer 1

Good point. Unite, create a tribe, create awareness for parents.
see what food does, see what supportgroups do. You are very insigtfull and helpfull by putting this into vibration the field around you. Excellent.There's many ways to support and it's never enough.
But..
Excess is the path to wisdom....
Please know that the carelessness is a part of these parents patterns. Ancestral patterns. They have to live this in order to evolve. After all we are all here for lessons. No matter how dark or monstrous. No light without darkness.
You are beautiful and light that has become life.
Love Frans

Answer 2

Unfortunately, babies don't come into this world with instructions. A lot parents just don't know how to raise their children. It is a very sad situation for our world. When parents or family members laugh when their small child says something vulgar, they are hurting their child. But children learn what they hear, and quickly. Parents are not doing their children any favors by letting them get away with things they shouldn't or giving in to them because they pitch a little temper tantrum. Children have to be taught how to behave and what is and what is not acceptable. Some parents fall short by a long way. Whenever I see a small child having a temper tantrum in a store because they want something---then the parent buys it so the child will stop; although I am not a violent person, at times I have thought about just going up and smacking that parent on the side of the head and telling the parent it's them that's causing this behavior in their child. Children should be raised with a lot of love with discipline to go along with that love. Raising a child as a spoiled brat hurts the child later in life. They are used to having their own way all the time and don't know how to handle situations that require them to give in to someone else, be it a playmate, a teacher, a boss, or a spouse. Violence is usually the outcome. Sadly, this is happening more and more in our society. Parents need to learn to tell their children no and mean it, need to teach them manners, show them lots of loving care, discipline properly, and make sure that their children know right from wrong. The first 5 years are the most formative years in a child's life. That's when these things need to be taught. If parents wait too long they suddenly find their children out of control and at times even turning on their parents. By then it's too late.

Answer 3

Sometimes the parents are to blame. If they are in public and letting their children bully others or not follow rules. If my child acted like that and would not listen, I took them straight home. But at the same time there are parents with children who are just extremely difficult and don't listen, period. I would not take them out if they were mine, but when they get to school the parent may not be able to change or help the child's behavior try as they might. Some are very supportive of teachers, etc. but can only do their best and keep trying, others just don't seem to care what their kids do or they think that they are so wonderful that the child can do no wrong. It's hard to tell sometimes if you don't know the situation. I must say though now having raised two adopted children that I no longer believe in nurture over nature. Nature has the upper hand , but nurture does help some over all.

Answer 4

Some parents just don't care and their kids grow up to be thugs because they have had no direction in life. They are missing love and guidance and just do their own thing which is driven by retaliation. After a while they don't want guidance and take their anxieties out on other kids. Kids also see things in the home which can influence they way they deal with life. My son has gone through his parents getting a divorce but he is such a wonderful son, I think because of his upbringing. He is clever, well adjusted and sensible. He has his down points but everyone has. These thugs you talk about have a very bad home life. To an extent I feel sorry for them but when you see what they do generally, they are just low life and their parents need to be chastised for causing that.

Answer 5

I think for the most part it is the parents to blame. Of course, the bad parents can never admit or accept that they are bad parents, and probably they had bad parents themselves. You really can't expect someone who grew up in a dysfunctional family and never saw what good parenting was to be a good parent. Note that by "good", I certainly don't mean "loving". Even the most terrible parents still love their kids usually.

There are some kids that just turn out bad in spite of everything, but it is the exception rather than the rule.

You really see this when you go to some other countries where it is the culture for children to be meek and mild. You don't see the behavioral problems US kids have. It is all what the kids learn, and they learn from their parents first, and from other kids and TV.

Answer 6

I feel we are very much at fault. The way you raise you kids has a direct effect in what type of adult they turn out to be. Not just discipline, but what a lot of people fail to remember is that you CAN NOT tell a child 'do as I say not as I do' because they are sponges. They soak up everything they hear and/or see. I especially hate when I see a parent yelling at a child to not do or touch something at a store and they're using foul language. Behaving that way is telling them that it is okay to speak that way when your angry. Parents need to explain themselves to kids. Don't tell them to do or not do something without explaining why. People underestimate how intelligent kids are. The key is to watch everything you do and say in the presence of your children, because you can take them to church at 10 am then leave and start yelling and cursing at 10 pm and that is all they will remember. It's all in thru one ear out the other because children all visual creatures. What they see is what they learn. Ultimately they grow up and are exposed to all the bad stuff but that is why we need to instill all the good first so that they know that it's bad stuff and know that isn't the way to be a productive citizen and human. I am not just some person talking crap, I am a parent. My child is exposed to bad stuff but because she doesn't see or hear this from me and I've made it clear that it's wrong she doesn't mimic it. So in the end no matter what bridges they come across there is a foundation that is set for life.

Answer 7

I think of it as being on a boat.

You can be the best captain in the world. But boats float and they have a way of going wherever the waves take them. All you can do is try your best to steer them. You can be the best captain in the world, and still, when the weather's bad, or things come up out of your control, you have so little of that control over them. As a parent or guardian, you can't be there every second of every day. You can be the best captain in the world and still have something bad happen to your boat.

Someone else can be the worst captain in the world, and that boat can still turn out okay, especially if it's a really good boat. But it's a lot better to have a good boat and a good captain. Otherwise, it's just the luck of the draw and the waves take you wherever they will. You can wind up in Tahiti or you can wind up on the rocks, in any boat and with any captain. It doesn't hurt to ask God to help steer, either, and thank Him for the good days, don't just go running to Him on the bad ones. I'm sure He appreciates that.

Peace and love.

Answer 8

I see this sort of thing from time to time myself. The best answer is for the parents that "do" care to remove their children away from the ones that will not play nice. You are so right many parents are being very ignorant and they are not taking responsibilty for their children. It really is not up to other parents to be babysitter's. But in a positive light if another good parent bravely sheds some light on another child child then maybe there is hope?
And furthermore if you do not want the responsibilty, then do not have unprotected sex and punish the children.

Answer 9

I think it is because if parents don't no how to educate their kids and they let them do whatever they want they are only going to get worse as they grow. I dont no why it's so hard for parents to spank their kids if they ever do any thing bad. When i say spank i say it at a moderate level dont get all violent. other parents just dont no how to say no to thier children, parents really have to try to put their kids through the correct road rit now that they are still little because when they get older it'll be too late.

Answer 10

I think that parents are mostly but not completely to blame. A child has an inner self too and can choose it's own direction by drawing on the many examples it encounters through life, even against the parent's wishes. For example a kid that inherits stubborness from great great granpa won't listen to anything anyone tries to teach them but usually the parents are at fault. Any moron can make a child and raise it wrongly.