1. How does a parent confront a offspring (over 18) who has a huge collection of dirty magazines, videos, dvds hidden away in his room?
2. Does this mean he masturbates and will never be interested in getting a real girlfriend?
3. Should I seize the porn and burn it?
4. How normal is this in young people?
2006-08-07 04:10:21 · 17 answers · asked by puppet 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If it is hidden in his room then he's being respectful enough of you not to leave it out in the open where you would easily find it. You might return this courtesy by not looking around for it and going through his things. You are invading his privacy as well as his trust.
2006-08-07 04:23:24 · answer #1 · answered by Avid 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If he is over 18, it is none of your concern. Obviously you were snooping or you wouldn't know about said collection.
Even men with wives sometimes masterbate to porn, it doesn't mean they don't want a girlfriend or wife.
No, you shouldn't seize it. How would you feel if he did that to your stuff, say when you are OLD and he is taking care of you?
It is totally normal. Let him be. I am only 28, but DO have a son and once he hits a certain age, I fully expect him to do these things as well. As long as he keeps the door shut, why should I care? I think it is better for him to do that than sleep with tons of trampy girls and possibly get an STD, an unwanted pregnancy or HIV. Think about it!
2006-08-07 11:19:15 · answer #2 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If a boy masturbates that doesn't mean at all that he will never be interested in getting a real girlfriend. Lots and LOTS of young boys/college boys look at porn all of the time. I don't think you should do anything with the porn. You might confront him about it but that would make the situation even more awkward than it already is, considering that you just found tons of porn in your sons room and that is probably embarassing for both you and him. I think you should just talk to him and see if there are any girls he might be interested in to get him thinking about real girls and take his mind off porn stars for a while.
2006-08-07 11:21:11 · answer #3 · answered by bubabe_08 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. If he is over 18, what is his plan for moving out? If he is out of college, it is time to make him want to be on his own. Reguardless, you both need to have rules to respect each other. You should make it clear to him that you disaprove of such material and that if he decides to go against your wishes you better not see it. You should respect his privacy and not snoop around his room. If you do you may lose your sone forever.
2. Of course he masturbates. Every normal male between the ages of puburty and death enjoy the activity even if your married or dating. Masturbating doesn't take the place of a real girl unless he likes gay porn.
3. Hell no, he will resent you for it. If you make a rule that if you ever see it laying around, then it is OK.
4. This is normal.
2006-08-07 11:18:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Grab the porno collection and ask him how he had enough money to pay for it. If he has enough money to pay for porn he has enough money to pay for rent, and seeing that hes over 18 and living with you it's time for him to leave and live life.
2. Does your husband masterbate? Yes, he does. Does your son? Yes, he does. Does the president? Yes, he does. The only thing that will make a man loose a sexual drive for a real relationship with a woman is getting it chopped off.
3. Don't seize the porn, confront him and embaress him.
4. Most boys masterbate on the internet around 12 or 13.
2006-08-07 11:17:34 · answer #5 · answered by Poestalker 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There are alot of guys over 18 that have pornography, parents just don't know it because most kids over 18 are out of the house and out on there own. If you don't condone such material in your house then let them know and that they should get rid of it. And know it doesn't mean he wont be interested in getting a girlfriend but what he has is taking care of business for the time being. I wouldn't worry to much about that
2006-08-07 11:20:35 · answer #6 · answered by dmxdragon2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It perfectly normal! Just leave him too it. The only time it would be a problem is when he gets a girlfriend (he will) if she doesn't approve and if he hides it from her ( personally I don't have a prob with my partner having a porn collection it's something we share). It's not anything to worry about he's just a healthy 18 year old.
2006-08-07 11:20:03 · answer #7 · answered by Sarah Piggy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's over 18 and keeps it out of sight. Stop snooping around, lady!
Masturbation is normal. You do it and so does your old man so why shouldn't your son??
No, you should not seize it! If he left it lying around the house in plain sight, especially in front of younger siblings, then you'd be well within your rights to toss it. By your own admission he keeps it hidden in his room.
2006-08-07 12:41:25 · answer #8 · answered by Bostonian In MO 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want it in your home, let him know that it will not be tolerated. It's your house and your rules are law!!
Even guys who are married masterbate, not all but some.
As far as seizing the porn, that's what I did. However, this was after I told him that I didn't want it in my house.
Not normal. Not all teens/young adults look at porn. Even if 99% did it, that doesn't make it OK. Especially if you're not OK with it in your home.
2006-08-07 11:23:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all, masterbation is 100% normal...second of all, porn is normal as well.... third of all, if he's over 18 then you have no right to be taking away his porn or even worrying about him masterbating at some point you have to let go and just hope he goes in the right path... maybe he has girls that are friends but he just doesn't want to share it with you and just cause he uses por, doesn't mean he won't have a normal life later on...so quit worrying about it
2006-08-07 11:18:21 · answer #10 · answered by prmami4eva_17 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋